What nobody tells you about losing weight
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CryingBlue wrote: »MistressSara wrote: »Stay in a deficit long enough and your erotic dreams might be all about food.
Yes ugh, I hate the food dreams.
Omg I have had food dreams this past week, I'm in a pretty big deficit so maybe that's it lmao4 -
I don't say a word about other people's food, but I find them defending or explaining the things they eat to me, probably without realizing it. Like, "I'm sorry, but I'm ordering the steak," or "would you mind if I get a dessert?" I still don't have a great response to this to help ease the tension. Any ideas?11
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Oh, and I'm always cold! In California!4
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CaliVeggieGal wrote: »I don't say a word about other people's food, but I find them defending or explaining the things they eat to me, probably without realizing it. Like, "I'm sorry, but I'm ordering the steak," or "would you mind if I get a dessert?" I still don't have a great response to this to help ease the tension. Any ideas?
"Oh go ahead" and move on to a different conversation. If they continue to explain their choice just do a happy "I don't mind" and try to move on again. I feel the more you linger on the topic or try to explain your choices the more they'll read it as a comparison to theirs and the more they'll feel awkward about it. The only time I'll explain a food choice is if explicitly asked why I'm not ordering something, and even then it's brief like "I don't like steak", "I've already had dessert", or "I don't feel like X today".10 -
What I’ve learned, that I never expected is that I never really REALIZED how big I was until I lost the weight. I mean I knew I was fat, but never really saw HOW FAT until I was able to compare before and after photos...53
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MistressSara wrote: »CryingBlue wrote: »MistressSara wrote: »Stay in a deficit long enough and your erotic dreams might be all about food.
Yes ugh, I hate the food dreams.
I like the dreams; it's the waking that stinks.
I was at a carnival last night and ate beautiful things I'm not sure even exist irl. Popcorn with colored sparkly sugar that exploded like pop rocks in my mouth. A burger with caramelized onions and eight kinds of cheese and as big as my head - my two hands could barely hold it. Then I woke up.
WOW that sounds like one of the best dreams ever LOL.6 -
CaliVeggieGal wrote: »I don't say a word about other people's food, but I find them defending or explaining the things they eat to me, probably without realizing it. Like, "I'm sorry, but I'm ordering the steak," or "would you mind if I get a dessert?" I still don't have a great response to this to help ease the tension. Any ideas?
I don't try to bring much attention to it - it's usually a combination of a person being respectful of the fact you're counting calories and self-criticism that they should do that, but aren't. So I go in with a mindset of being nice and
reassuring.
I respond to such statements with:
"Thanks for thinking about the fact that I'm on a diet. That's really nice. But you order what you want to order. I've got a plan."
"I'm ordering the steak too." (A small steak and a green salad is often one of the better choices on the menu anyway).
"Not at all! Waitress, can I get a coffee please?"11 -
Sober_Is_Sexy wrote: »What I’ve learned, that I never expected is that I never really REALIZED how big I was until I lost the weight. I mean I knew I was fat, but never really saw HOW FAT until I was able to compare before and after photos...
I had the same realization. Also I knew how to hide my large size well. I've been big my entire adult life. I was in denial with very high self confidence. I actually thought it was impossible for me to be smaller. After losing weight I realized how fat I really was browsing though old pictures. Some family members think something is wrong with me now that I'm smaller. My mom doesn't even know what I look like with a normal weight for my height so she is worried I'm losing too much. I have to remind her I'm still overweight for my height.
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CaliVeggieGal wrote: »I don't say a word about other people's food, but I find them defending or explaining the things they eat to me, probably without realizing it. Like, "I'm sorry, but I'm ordering the steak," or "would you mind if I get a dessert?" I still don't have a great response to this to help ease the tension. Any ideas?
I get this a LOT at work. Coworkers are constantly trying to defend their "bad" choices to me (I typically have a tiny lunch so I can have a HUGE dinner, so their normal-sized lunches often look like a large portion comparatively). I usually try to compliment what they're having ("That smells amazing, did you make it yourself?" or "I haven't had meatloaf in so long and that looks great. I'm going to have to make it one of these days"). It tends to deflect attention away from my lunch and lets them know that I'm not judging them for it.10 -
Having lost over 100 pounds there's a TON of stuff that changed that I didn't realize would happen:
1. Being able to walk for miles without feeling winded. I thought I would never get rid of that heavy feeling in my chest.
2. Riding roller coasters - I knew this would happen but I didn't realize how emotional and proud it would make me feel to be able to strap in with no issues or fear that I wouldn't fit.
3. Mirror - Catching a glimpse of myself in a mirror and not recognizing myself right away. This took months to get over.
4. "Fat Girl Syndrome" - I thought I would always be the biggest girl in the room that everyone stared at. I am still overweight but much closer to "normal" than before and I'm almost never the biggest girl in the room anymore.
5. Dress Shopping - I thought I would always hate trying on dresses. Now I love it! I have so many more options as a size 14 than I did as a size 26.
There's a bunch more but these are the ones that immediately come to mind.37 -
CaliVeggieGal wrote: »I don't say a word about other people's food, but I find them defending or explaining the things they eat to me, probably without realizing it. Like, "I'm sorry, but I'm ordering the steak," or "would you mind if I get a dessert?" I still don't have a great response to this to help ease the tension. Any ideas?
@CaliVeggieGal I can’t help with what to say about the steak, but I have a standard desert line: I’m so glad you are getting desert because I wanted a coffee/cappuccino/tea but didn’t want to order it if you would just be sitting there waiting for me to finish ... That seems to counter the other person’s guilt or whatever and makes them order what they want for desert with ease.
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elisa123gal wrote: »This is very true... Eating out made me fat. Now that i eat whole foods and lost the weight, i know the food is fake and filled with chemicals and preservatives that make you fat. i much rather eat my own cooking...and dread having to go out tomorrow night. i'm not tempted...it is just work trying to figure out something decent to eat.There may come a point where eating out is a chore. Most days, I'd so much rather cook at home than go out.
But that's just me. YMMV.
That's not exactly what I meant.
Eating out didn't make me fat. Over eating made me fat. I just pre-log my whole day but often get asked out to dinner at the last minute, so I have to put in more effort to make it fit into my calories. At home, my dinners are heavily veggie based and fairly light, so I front load my day, and by the time dinner rolls around, I don't have a ton of calories to play with. Going out means going for a walk or to the gym to make room. That's the "chore" part.
I prefer to be given notice before going out so that I can figure out what to eat and how to make It fit my calories. A late notice ramen run is definitely not as easy to fit into my calories as zoodles21 -
elisa123gal wrote: »This is very true... Eating out made me fat. Now that i eat whole foods and lost the weight, i know the food is fake and filled with chemicals and preservatives that make you fat. i much rather eat my own cooking...and dread having to go out tomorrow night. i'm not tempted...it is just work trying to figure out something decent to eat.There may come a point where eating out is a chore. Most days, I'd so much rather cook at home than go out.
But that's just me. YMMV.
That's not exactly what I meant.
Eating out didn't make me fat. Over eating made me fat. I just pre-log my whole day but often get asked out to dinner at the last minute, so I have to put in more effort to make it fit into my calories. At home, my dinners are heavily veggie based and fairly light, so I front load my day, and by the time dinner rolls around, I don't have a ton of calories to play with. Going out means going for a walk or to the gym to make room. That's the "chore" part.
I prefer to be given notice before going out so that I can figure out what to eat and how to make It fit my calories. A late notice ramen run is definitely not as easy to fit into my calories as zoodles
It is more work to eat out, but I really do enjoy it, I just like to plan for it. I have been limiting myself to 2 meals out a week. Last night was an unplanned one and the bartender was laughing at me because I couldn't decide what I wanted(not a ton of healthy options, but they know me and know how I order, lol)....I wanted a burger and fries, but I didn't plan for a burger and fries, so I got a salad and started with envy at the guy's plate that was sitting next to me. Had it been a planned meal out, I would have eaten differently during the day and had the burger.13 -
That I would actually, truly CHERISH the fact that I CAN run. A real run. 10-12 minute mile pace. Slow for some, but I don't think I ever ran this fast when I was a kid. I know I didn't in high school.34
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Sober_Is_Sexy wrote: »What I’ve learned, that I never expected is that I never really REALIZED how big I was until I lost the weight. I mean I knew I was fat, but never really saw HOW FAT until I was able to compare before and after photos...
100%
When I was obese I would look at pictures of myself when I was "thinner" and get so sad. Now 90lbs later I look at my "thinner" pictures and I look huge in them.
I really had no idea how big I was getting. I thought I hid it well but there is no way no one noticed LOL
My boyfriend had the same realization the other day. He didn't see me as that fat but now that I'm A LOT thinner he's amazed.29 -
When I was sooo much heavier, I got my work to buy me an expensive chair so that I had more room and was more solidly built. Now I float in that chair and it feels like a throne. A lovely feeling.
I live in a large metropolitan city and I no longer get that sour look from other passengers on the underground/subway/metro/bus that says, 'I don't want you squashing in next to me.' After all this time, that still surprises me. In fact, before on public transport both of my sides used to touch the arm-rests, now there is plenty of room--and I am one of those people who sit cross-legged. I used to be so envious of that. And what is more, I really do not mind standing now.
On another note, I am so much more confident and bold. I engage with strangers and ask questions so much more easily. I would not have predicted that being a more normal weight would give me a better sense of self-confidence.32 -
What has surprised me is I still see myself as big guy even though people say different and had some friends that haven't seen me not even recognize me. What I love though now is can flex and have something to show and love that my arms are tight in my shirts because of muscle and not fat.19
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I've had this weird thing happen:
My waist has gotten smaller faster than my hips, so when I lay on my side, I kind of collapse a little in the middle. The left side has been especially affected, so I now get muscle spasms/cramps if I lay on the opposite side for too long (scrunching the left side, if you can picture it). The other side is mostly fine *for now* but it's made the sleeping situation much more complicated.
I had a similar strange occurrence. I was having very odd stomach cramps. I went to the doctor to get myself all checked out and I am in excellent health and I have never felt better. However, according to my doctor, it turns out that it is not uncommon for people who lose vast amounts of weight (in my case over 50kg/100lbs) to experience a period where the organs and stomach need to settle back into place. Visceral fat and muscle changes can cause some disruption. I have also been switching to a mostly meat-free so that will have also had a bearing.23
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