Moved to America, now struggling to get under control

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Replies

  • Annie_01
    Annie_01 Posts: 3,096 Member
    lemurcat12 wrote: »
    Annie_01 wrote: »
    OP, as a European living in US I can understand what you are saying. Everything is bigger here. I can't imagine what portion size looks like in Texas. Lol. There has to be some truth behind the statistics that show that more than 50% of people in US are overweight. But there's overweight people everywhere.
    All that means is that it takes a little more work, but it's doable. You just have to adjust your portion size.

    I have relatives in TX and when we visit the thing that always surprises me is the big hair and high heels lol. We were there one year for a cousin's wedding and that was quite the culture shock-how they do weddings is much different than how we do weddings here in the midwest. Food wise I didn't notice anything different except the rehearsal dinner was at a very upscale steak house and the portions were grotesque in size. But, I just ate how much I'd normally eat and then left the rest. Still fit into my size 2 dress the next day for the wedding :)

    It is strange our perception of things. I live in Austin TX and I rarely see big hair and high heels. If you had of said cowboy boots I would agree!

    I think of TX as having much bigger hair than here, but not Austin (which I love, you are lucky), but more Dallas or Houston. I've never done anything especially formal in Austin (or San Antonio), but only in Dallas (and I went to a wedding in Houston years ago), so that all colors it, perhaps.

    When I first moved here I thought the same thing. Austin fortunately...is different to say the least. As a result we are one of the fastest growing cities in the US. It is often said to be the next San Francisco. I believe it based on how real estate is rising.

    Are you familiar with this show?

    http://abc.go.com/shows/gcb

    It was basically the stereotypical idea of Texas.

  • lemurcat12
    lemurcat12 Posts: 30,886 Member
    Yet another member genuinely asking for some help, who didn't word her OP perfectly and is now subject to the usual MFP style of bullying behaviour that 99% of us would vehemently object to if it happened to us in our real lives. "Let's all climb aboard the pedantic express and ride this noob till she crashes!". Sometimes I feel like I've accidentally fallen into a YouTube comment section.

    Love it.

    Yes, OP worded it a little too strong, but funny thing is how many people that never lived outside US pretend to have a fair view of what she is saying.

    You don't know to what extent we've lived in/purchased food outside the US, and as noted there are huge differences within the US. If OP had been writing from, I dunno, Little Rock (and I might be being unfair), I personally would have had a different reaction than claiming you can't get diet-friendly food in Denver. As I said upthread, I found it difficult when driving around MS for a couple of days. If I lived in MS for 2.5 years (where the options would be quite different from what I am used to in Chicago), I expect I would have figured it out and if not when writing a post I would say "hey, what do people who live here do for these specific needs?", not say that I was gaining weight because none of the right things were available in Mississippi.

    That said, I think people are quite willing to help if she's more specific about her concerns/what she's looking for and why what she finds is inadequate. It seems like OP wants more premade stuff than I normally buy, and of course brands are going to be different here and convenience stuff more different than ingredients, but to claim she cannot find reasonable options in Denver vs. the UK seems questionable. Denver is a reasonably health-conscious city. My guess is that the healthy options in Denver compare quite favorably to those in at least some parts of the UK.
  • wellthenwhat
    wellthenwhat Posts: 526 Member
    OP, as a European living in US I can understand what you are saying. Everything is bigger here. I can't imagine what portion size looks like in Texas. Lol. There has to be some truth behind the statistics that show that more than 50% of people in US are overweight. But there's overweight people everywhere.
    All that means is that it takes a little more work, but it's doable. You just have to adjust your portion size.

    I have relatives in TX and when we visit the thing that always surprises me is the big hair and high heels lol. We were there one year for a cousin's wedding and that was quite the culture shock-how they do weddings is much different than how we do weddings here in the midwest. Food wise I didn't notice anything different except the rehearsal dinner was at a very upscale steak house and the portions were grotesque in size. But, I just ate how much I'd normally eat and then left the rest. Still fit into my size 2 dress the next day for the wedding :)

    I always ask for a takeout box when they bring me my meal, put the portion I don't plan to eat in there, and procede to eat my (now normal sized) meal off my plate. I never leave food behind as I am anti-waste to a fault.
  • 1AutumnDay
    1AutumnDay Posts: 17 Member
    edited May 2017
    I think everyone has give her fair advice and not been bullying.
    She's been here for 2 years and has had plenty of time to adjust and find ways to lose the excess weight, just as she was able to do in the U.K.
    If she was overweight in the U.K. at one time, why can't she do the same here? It's not the country she is living in that is the issue.
  • Annie_01
    Annie_01 Posts: 3,096 Member
    bubaluboo wrote: »
    Yet another member genuinely asking for some help, who didn't word her OP perfectly and is now subject to the usual MFP style of bullying behaviour that 99% of us would vehemently object to if it happened to us in our real lives. "Let's all climb aboard the pedantic express and ride this noob till she crashes!". Sometimes I feel like I've accidentally fallen into a YouTube comment section.

    Love it.

    Yes, OP worded it a little too strong, but funny thing is how many people that never lived outside US pretend to have a fair view of what she is saying.

    I was wondering how many people that are getting offended by the OP have tried living abroad (not just a holiday). There is so much to deal with and food is just one of many things that can be bewildering! It looks from some replies as though one should ask not advice on here, just suck it up and work it out for yourself otherwise you're just not putting in the effort. I hope that the OP sees past all those replies as there are a lot of helpful people on here.

    I have never lived outside the US...however...

    My son lived in Germany for a year. It is where he learned to shop and cook on his own. His complaint when he came back to the US was that there were too many options for him at the grocery store. Items were labelled differently...to many variables. Take for example milk...full fat, low fat, 1%, 2%, 0%, half & half...etc...etc. He gave up cooking for the most part and went back to take-away.

    I watch a lot of cooking shows out of the UK and Australia. Often they mention things that I have never heard of. I have to look it up to find out what it is. So if the OP did ask at the market for a specific item they might not know what she is talking about nor she might not have known what to ask for. It takes time and research to figure it all out.

    On a side note...I think that both sides have some valid points...both sides could have worded things a little differently.
  • 1AutumnDay
    1AutumnDay Posts: 17 Member
    lemurcat12 wrote: »
    Yet another member genuinely asking for some help, who didn't word her OP perfectly and is now subject to the usual MFP style of bullying behaviour that 99% of us would vehemently object to if it happened to us in our real lives. "Let's all climb aboard the pedantic express and ride this noob till she crashes!". Sometimes I feel like I've accidentally fallen into a YouTube comment section.

    Love it.

    Yes, OP worded it a little too strong, but funny thing is how many people that never lived outside US pretend to have a fair view of what she is saying.

    You don't know to what extent we've lived in/purchased food outside the US, and as noted there are huge differences within the US. If OP had been writing from, I dunno, Little Rock (and I might be being unfair), I personally would have had a different reaction than claiming you can't get diet-friendly food in Denver. As I said upthread, I found it difficult when driving around MS for a couple of days. If I lived in MS for 2.5 years (where the options would be quite different from what I am used to in Chicago), I expect I would have figured it out and if not when writing a post I would say "hey, what do people who live here do for these specific needs?", not say that I was gaining weight because none of the right things were available in Mississippi.

    That said, I think people are quite willing to help if she's more specific about her concerns/what she's looking for and why what she finds is inadequate. It seems like OP wants more premade stuff than I normally buy, and of course brands are going to be different here and convenience stuff more different than ingredients, but to claim she cannot find reasonable options in Denver vs. the UK seems questionable. Denver is a reasonably health-conscious city. My guess is that the healthy options in Denver compare quite favorably to those in at least some parts of the UK.

    I'm not going to split hairs with you. I agree with many points you are making.

    However, people spend a lot of energy judging others here, instead of trying to help.
    This is not a "win the internet" competition, nobody cares how smart someone is. Either offer advice or have a mature discussion without judgement and blame.
    I took the point of this post as "culture shock including nutrition ". Many took it as " OP is making excuses. I was fat once and I lost weight, so I'm gonna show her that she is making excuses".

    How long should culture shock last?
    I've read many people here offering her advice as far as reading labels more carefully, weighing everything, move more ... I'm not seeing too much bullying ... just their perspectives.
  • Dnarules
    Dnarules Posts: 2,081 Member
    Yet another member genuinely asking for some help, who didn't word her OP perfectly and is now subject to the usual MFP style of bullying behaviour that 99% of us would vehemently object to if it happened to us in our real lives. "Let's all climb aboard the pedantic express and ride this noob till she crashes!". Sometimes I feel like I've accidentally fallen into a YouTube comment section.

    Love it.

    Yes, OP worded it a little too strong, but funny thing is how many people that never lived outside US pretend to have a fair view of what she is saying.

    Maybe. I also find it funny how many who really haven't lived in the US.seem to have a lot to say about what we have and don't have.
  • Ironandwine69
    Ironandwine69 Posts: 2,432 Member
    1AutumnDay wrote: »
    lemurcat12 wrote: »
    Yet another member genuinely asking for some help, who didn't word her OP perfectly and is now subject to the usual MFP style of bullying behaviour that 99% of us would vehemently object to if it happened to us in our real lives. "Let's all climb aboard the pedantic express and ride this noob till she crashes!". Sometimes I feel like I've accidentally fallen into a YouTube comment section.

    Love it.

    Yes, OP worded it a little too strong, but funny thing is how many people that never lived outside US pretend to have a fair view of what she is saying.

    You don't know to what extent we've lived in/purchased food outside the US, and as noted there are huge differences within the US. If OP had been writing from, I dunno, Little Rock (and I might be being unfair), I personally would have had a different reaction than claiming you can't get diet-friendly food in Denver. As I said upthread, I found it difficult when driving around MS for a couple of days. If I lived in MS for 2.5 years (where the options would be quite different from what I am used to in Chicago), I expect I would have figured it out and if not when writing a post I would say "hey, what do people who live here do for these specific needs?", not say that I was gaining weight because none of the right things were available in Mississippi.

    That said, I think people are quite willing to help if she's more specific about her concerns/what she's looking for and why what she finds is inadequate. It seems like OP wants more premade stuff than I normally buy, and of course brands are going to be different here and convenience stuff more different than ingredients, but to claim she cannot find reasonable options in Denver vs. the UK seems questionable. Denver is a reasonably health-conscious city. My guess is that the healthy options in Denver compare quite favorably to those in at least some parts of the UK.

    I'm not going to split hairs with you. I agree with many points you are making.

    However, people spend a lot of energy judging others here, instead of trying to help.
    This is not a "win the internet" competition, nobody cares how smart someone is. Either offer advice or have a mature discussion without judgement and blame.
    I took the point of this post as "culture shock including nutrition ". Many took it as " OP is making excuses. I was fat once and I lost weight, so I'm gonna show her that she is making excuses".

    How long should culture shock last?
    I've read many people here offering her advice as far as reading labels more carefully, weighing everything, move more ... I'm not seeing too much bullying ... just their perspectives.

    My parents have been living here for 6 years and are still in culture shock. People adapt differently.
  • Ironandwine69
    Ironandwine69 Posts: 2,432 Member
    Dnarules wrote: »
    Yet another member genuinely asking for some help, who didn't word her OP perfectly and is now subject to the usual MFP style of bullying behaviour that 99% of us would vehemently object to if it happened to us in our real lives. "Let's all climb aboard the pedantic express and ride this noob till she crashes!". Sometimes I feel like I've accidentally fallen into a YouTube comment section.

    Love it.

    Yes, OP worded it a little too strong, but funny thing is how many people that never lived outside US pretend to have a fair view of what she is saying.

    Maybe. I also find it funny how many who really haven't lived in the US.seem to have a lot to say about what we have and don't have.

    Since you quoted me, I'm going to assume it's directed to me. Having lived in Europe for 22 years and US for 13 years I can make a comparison.
  • Dnarules
    Dnarules Posts: 2,081 Member
    Dnarules wrote: »
    Yet another member genuinely asking for some help, who didn't word her OP perfectly and is now subject to the usual MFP style of bullying behaviour that 99% of us would vehemently object to if it happened to us in our real lives. "Let's all climb aboard the pedantic express and ride this noob till she crashes!". Sometimes I feel like I've accidentally fallen into a YouTube comment section.

    Love it.

    Yes, OP worded it a little too strong, but funny thing is how many people that never lived outside US pretend to have a fair view of what she is saying.

    Maybe. I also find it funny how many who really haven't lived in the US.seem to have a lot to say about what we have and don't have.

    Since you quoted me, I'm going to assume it's directed to me. Having lived in Europe for 22 years and US for 13 years I can make a comparison.

    I actually find the comparisons interesting. But some have been way off (not saying it was you).
  • Ironandwine69
    Ironandwine69 Posts: 2,432 Member
    Dnarules wrote: »
    Dnarules wrote: »
    Yet another member genuinely asking for some help, who didn't word her OP perfectly and is now subject to the usual MFP style of bullying behaviour that 99% of us would vehemently object to if it happened to us in our real lives. "Let's all climb aboard the pedantic express and ride this noob till she crashes!". Sometimes I feel like I've accidentally fallen into a YouTube comment section.

    Love it.

    Yes, OP worded it a little too strong, but funny thing is how many people that never lived outside US pretend to have a fair view of what she is saying.

    Maybe. I also find it funny how many who really haven't lived in the US.seem to have a lot to say about what we have and don't have.

    Since you quoted me, I'm going to assume it's directed to me. Having lived in Europe for 22 years and US for 13 years I can make a comparison.

    I actually find the comparisons interesting. But some have been way off (not saying it was you).

    Well here's what I think a good example. I'm from Greece, I came here and it took me some time to get used to the food etc. I don't cook much Greek food at all. I go to my mom's every Saturday, and she cooks Greek food. I see those dinners as "messing" with my cutting cycle now. When I go back home I panick a little, and am much heavier when I come back. Change is not easy, takes work and adjustment
  • 1AutumnDay
    1AutumnDay Posts: 17 Member
    Dnarules wrote: »
    Dnarules wrote: »
    Yet another member genuinely asking for some help, who didn't word her OP perfectly and is now subject to the usual MFP style of bullying behaviour that 99% of us would vehemently object to if it happened to us in our real lives. "Let's all climb aboard the pedantic express and ride this noob till she crashes!". Sometimes I feel like I've accidentally fallen into a YouTube comment section.

    Love it.

    Yes, OP worded it a little too strong, but funny thing is how many people that never lived outside US pretend to have a fair view of what she is saying.

    Maybe. I also find it funny how many who really haven't lived in the US.seem to have a lot to say about what we have and don't have.

    Since you quoted me, I'm going to assume it's directed to me. Having lived in Europe for 22 years and US for 13 years I can make a comparison.

    I actually find the comparisons interesting. But some have been way off (not saying it was you).

    Well here's what I think a good example. I'm from Greece, I came here and it took me some time to get used to the food etc. I don't cook much Greek food at all. I go to my mom's every Saturday, and she cooks Greek food. I see those dinners as "messing" with my cutting cycle now. When I go back home I panick a little, and am much heavier when I come back. Change is not easy, takes work and adjustment

    But you are not blaming Greece for your panicking ... it's the food you choose to eat
  • lemurcat12
    lemurcat12 Posts: 30,886 Member
    edited May 2017
    Dnarules wrote: »
    Yet another member genuinely asking for some help, who didn't word her OP perfectly and is now subject to the usual MFP style of bullying behaviour that 99% of us would vehemently object to if it happened to us in our real lives. "Let's all climb aboard the pedantic express and ride this noob till she crashes!". Sometimes I feel like I've accidentally fallen into a YouTube comment section.

    Love it.

    Yes, OP worded it a little too strong, but funny thing is how many people that never lived outside US pretend to have a fair view of what she is saying.

    Maybe. I also find it funny how many who really haven't lived in the US.seem to have a lot to say about what we have and don't have.

    Since you quoted me, I'm going to assume it's directed to me. Having lived in Europe for 22 years and US for 13 years I can make a comparison.

    My view is that "Europe" and "the US" are both far too broad categories to compare.

    I'd also say that being stuck with what mom cooks is different from being stuck with everything that one can buy in Denver. Staying with family can be awkward, not having control of what you are given can be difficult, but I don't think that's what the thread is about.
  • Ironandwine69
    Ironandwine69 Posts: 2,432 Member
    1AutumnDay wrote: »
    Dnarules wrote: »
    Dnarules wrote: »
    Yet another member genuinely asking for some help, who didn't word her OP perfectly and is now subject to the usual MFP style of bullying behaviour that 99% of us would vehemently object to if it happened to us in our real lives. "Let's all climb aboard the pedantic express and ride this noob till she crashes!". Sometimes I feel like I've accidentally fallen into a YouTube comment section.

    Love it.

    Yes, OP worded it a little too strong, but funny thing is how many people that never lived outside US pretend to have a fair view of what she is saying.

    Maybe. I also find it funny how many who really haven't lived in the US.seem to have a lot to say about what we have and don't have.

    Since you quoted me, I'm going to assume it's directed to me. Having lived in Europe for 22 years and US for 13 years I can make a comparison.

    I actually find the comparisons interesting. But some have been way off (not saying it was you).

    Well here's what I think a good example. I'm from Greece, I came here and it took me some time to get used to the food etc. I don't cook much Greek food at all. I go to my mom's every Saturday, and she cooks Greek food. I see those dinners as "messing" with my cutting cycle now. When I go back home I panick a little, and am much heavier when I come back. Change is not easy, takes work and adjustment

    But you are not blaming Greece for your panicking ... it's the food you choose to eat

    Agree. The word choices were not the best.
    And I got heavier when to China too, because I changed my routine and I didn't know how much or what I was eating. At some point you have to start paying attention to what you are feeding yourself and adapt. I think OP has not met that point yet, or is working on it.
  • 1AutumnDay
    1AutumnDay Posts: 17 Member
    1AutumnDay wrote: »
    Dnarules wrote: »
    Dnarules wrote: »
    Yet another member genuinely asking for some help, who didn't word her OP perfectly and is now subject to the usual MFP style of bullying behaviour that 99% of us would vehemently object to if it happened to us in our real lives. "Let's all climb aboard the pedantic express and ride this noob till she crashes!". Sometimes I feel like I've accidentally fallen into a YouTube comment section.

    Love it.

    Yes, OP worded it a little too strong, but funny thing is how many people that never lived outside US pretend to have a fair view of what she is saying.

    Maybe. I also find it funny how many who really haven't lived in the US.seem to have a lot to say about what we have and don't have.

    Since you quoted me, I'm going to assume it's directed to me. Having lived in Europe for 22 years and US for 13 years I can make a comparison.

    I actually find the comparisons interesting. But some have been way off (not saying it was you).

    Well here's what I think a good example. I'm from Greece, I came here and it took me some time to get used to the food etc. I don't cook much Greek food at all. I go to my mom's every Saturday, and she cooks Greek food. I see those dinners as "messing" with my cutting cycle now. When I go back home I panick a little, and am much heavier when I come back. Change is not easy, takes work and adjustment

    But you are not blaming Greece for your panicking ... it's the food you choose to eat

    Agree. The word choices were not the best.
    And I got heavier when to China too, because I changed my routine and I didn't know how much or what I was eating. At some point you have to start paying attention to what you are feeding yourself and adapt. I think OP has not met that point yet, or is working on it.

    Also, agreed.

    Same situation for me .... I visit my grandma and it is all German cooking. I always bring a side dish that I love and will not be tempted to eat the yummy taters. But, oh my ... all the meat :-))
  • lemurcat12
    lemurcat12 Posts: 30,886 Member
    lemurcat12 wrote: »
    Yet another member genuinely asking for some help, who didn't word her OP perfectly and is now subject to the usual MFP style of bullying behaviour that 99% of us would vehemently object to if it happened to us in our real lives. "Let's all climb aboard the pedantic express and ride this noob till she crashes!". Sometimes I feel like I've accidentally fallen into a YouTube comment section.

    Love it.

    Yes, OP worded it a little too strong, but funny thing is how many people that never lived outside US pretend to have a fair view of what she is saying.

    You don't know to what extent we've lived in/purchased food outside the US, and as noted there are huge differences within the US. If OP had been writing from, I dunno, Little Rock (and I might be being unfair), I personally would have had a different reaction than claiming you can't get diet-friendly food in Denver. As I said upthread, I found it difficult when driving around MS for a couple of days. If I lived in MS for 2.5 years (where the options would be quite different from what I am used to in Chicago), I expect I would have figured it out and if not when writing a post I would say "hey, what do people who live here do for these specific needs?", not say that I was gaining weight because none of the right things were available in Mississippi.

    That said, I think people are quite willing to help if she's more specific about her concerns/what she's looking for and why what she finds is inadequate. It seems like OP wants more premade stuff than I normally buy, and of course brands are going to be different here and convenience stuff more different than ingredients, but to claim she cannot find reasonable options in Denver vs. the UK seems questionable. Denver is a reasonably health-conscious city. My guess is that the healthy options in Denver compare quite favorably to those in at least some parts of the UK.

    I'm not going to split hairs with you. I agree with many points you are making.

    However, people spend a lot of energy judging others here, instead of trying to help.
    This is not a "win the internet" competition, nobody cares how smart someone is. Either offer advice or have a mature discussion without judgement and blame.
    I took the point of this post as "culture shock including nutrition ". Many took it as " OP is making excuses. I was fat once and I lost weight, so I'm gonna show her that she is making excuses".

    I'd say (1) we need more information to help. (Information I'd expect would have been provided if OP was asking for real help vs. just complaining about how hard it is in the US, which is why I read her post the way I did, but I have already apologized if I misread it and asked follow up questions with the intent of helping.)

    And (2), people had a variety of responses, so grouping them all under one broad umbrella (being judgy or whatever) for not being exactly like you (or others, since Johnny Penso's post is the one that got under my skin, not really yours) is usually not going to further the discussion.

    What I noted from the OP was not culture shock (I've never found not having the exact foods I eat at home a reason for culture shock when traveling, and the food differences US to UK are not going to be so incredibly huge, I bet you'd get more differences within the US than between two cities in the US and UK). Instead, I saw that she'd been quite heavy in the UK, lost weight, found it easy for a time and was finding that it was getting harder -- all things that are common -- but blaming a difficulty in finding lower cal food in Denver, where I think there is a lot of quite healthy, low cal food. I also noticed that she seemed to be limiting what she was looking for and where she was looking and that's totally fine but explains any difficulties and we could respond better if we understood what she saw as her requirements (buying food of a certain price point, premade, no leftovers, certain tastes, whatever).
  • Annie_01
    Annie_01 Posts: 3,096 Member
    To those that have moved to the US...

    If I understand correctly most European countries report calories is 100g amounts. Did it make it difficult to transition to portion sizes that are used in the US?
  • 1AutumnDay
    1AutumnDay Posts: 17 Member
    Annie_01 wrote: »
    To those that have moved to the US...

    If I understand correctly most European countries report calories is 100g amounts. Did it make it difficult to transition to portion sizes that are used in the US?

    100g = 100g

    Hence the need for weighing everything :-)
  • lemurcat12
    lemurcat12 Posts: 30,886 Member
    Random aside, but one of my best friends is Greek (born here, but her parents came here in the '60s) and other friends and I always love hearing about all the differences between what we ate as kids -- typically US midwestern -- and what she did. It's always amazing to learn that she never had peanut butter growing up or was never faced with the horrors of a typical midwestern casserole or jello salad. But she will slam the things her mom cooked too (and speak of culture shock when being brought back to the more rural place they came from as a kid, from her normal residence in the Chicago 'burbs).