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Been Judged By Your Appearance?

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  • LofterenLofteren Posts: 961Member Member Posts: 961Member Member
    Patients ask me at work when they're going to see the neurophysiologist. Only, I am the neurophysiologist.... apparently neurophysiologists aren't supposed to be big or have tattoos.
  • blueeyesgraceblueeyesgrace Posts: 409Member Member Posts: 409Member Member
    Lofteren wrote: »
    Patients ask me at work when they're going to see the neurophysiologist. Only, I am the neurophysiologist.... apparently neurophysiologists aren't supposed to be big or have tattoos.

    I get mistaken for the doctor all the time by patients, sometimes I get mistaken for a nurse. I am neither - I am an allied health professional, but I am not a doctor or a nurse. Funny how people judge based on appearance in these situations, too!
  • jgnatcajgnatca Posts: 14,495Member Member Posts: 14,495Member Member
    There's a Ted talk about this.
    http://www.ted.com/talks/verna_myers_how_to_overcome_our_biases_walk_boldly_toward_them
    Overcome biases by gazing at faces we would normally shy away from.
  • lessismoreohiolessismoreohio Posts: 923Member Member Posts: 923Member Member
    We're all judged by our appearance each and every day; either consciously or subconsciously by the person doing the judging.
  • Holly_Roman_EmpireHolly_Roman_Empire Posts: 4,461Member Member Posts: 4,461Member Member
    I've never been more judged than when I have been pregnant.
  • seltzermint555seltzermint555 Posts: 9,551Member Member Posts: 9,551Member Member
    My favorite is men assuming because I am a women, that I don't know anything about cars. Especially when I was car shopping. It was great to see them try and explain things to me,a and more often than not they were wrong- I would then turn around and tell them they were wrong, and list the actual specs on the car I was looking at. The look on their faces= priceless.

    Yes! I get this quite often! Just because I'm a gal doesn't mean that I don't still know a thing or two about cars, home renovations, etc. I can hold my own. Although I will admit that I can't hold my own when it comes to baking. I can cook, but I'm not the Betty Crocker type. I do own an apron, but I'm pretty sure it hangs in the kitchen for aesthetics...


    So, I've gotta admit that I am a little tiny bit that Betty Crocker type and I don't know anything about guns, reptiles, and very little about cars beyond what my husband tells me in anecdotes (he does a lot of writing for the new auto industry and is into old cars as well).

    But I have still experienced a bit of this stuff too! Especially with my ex husband. When we went to get a loan, buy a home, etc...the bankers would always talk to him, instead of me, and then within a short time they would learn their mistake. I hate the way that goes! Still happens sometimes...for example I've been on my own for 17 years and my husband has been on his own for less than a decade. So I just have more experience in certain things. I am not a woman who feels she must wear the pants in my household but I'm definitely independent and knowledgeable. Because I'm smiley and feminine acting it's assumed that I leave everything up to the mister. Ugh.
    edited January 2015
  • JackKopChJackKopCh Posts: 8,055Member Member Posts: 8,055Member Member
    I get the whole 'nerd' thing and everyone assuming I can fix any device they throw at me, but yeah, other than that, just the odd occasion of being called fat back when I was at my heaviest :\
  • Calliope610Calliope610 Posts: 3,912Member Member Posts: 3,912Member Member
    I don't know if I've been "judged based on appearance", but I can sure-as-hell tell you that I judge based on appearance.

    ETA: Now that I think about it, I would say I judge more based on an individual's actions/behaviors than their appearance. But, without any other information, how else does one decide whether to interact with another or not??
  • 47Jacqueline47Jacqueline Posts: 7,076Member Member Posts: 7,076Member Member
    Oh, yes. And it's usually the other person's issue.
  • yourradimradletshugyourradimradletshug Posts: 965Member Member Posts: 965Member Member
    Quite a bit. Guys don't expect a 5 foot blond to know how to fire a gun or fish. They laugh until I start hitting the red of the target or catch 10 pound catfish on a first cast. I also get people who question my intelligence because I am very bubbly and silly at times but in all actuality I am very smart.

    I can't say I am totally innocent because I have judged people based on looks but I am trying to get better about that.
  • ShibaEarsShibaEars Posts: 4,109Member Member Posts: 4,109Member Member
    Nothing too bad, but I look young, so a lot of times people assume I don't know anything, usually when I'm at work. It drives me crazy - I've been here for 9 years, I have a good idea of what I'm doing!

    However, it does make me feel better when I get ID'd at the liquor store :)
  • fedup30fedup30 Posts: 142Member Member Posts: 142Member Member
    I have "resting [email protected]#h face". People have told me I come off as angry or [email protected]#hy because I don't smile like a goon all the time... Oh well. The people who know me know that is not the case :smiley:
  • TheVirgoddessTheVirgoddess Posts: 4,588Member Member Posts: 4,588Member Member
    indycoltz wrote: »
    oh yes. One day I was on the highway, a small highway. I was driving home, & a lady, about 75 years old, had a stalled vehicle and was simply standing on the side of the road trying to wave down some help. I got out of my car, walked up to her, the fear in her eyes said it all. She said, & I quote, "oh, I was waiting for someone else".
    I get it though.

    This is terrible. I'm so sorry.
  • TheVirgoddessTheVirgoddess Posts: 4,588Member Member Posts: 4,588Member Member
    fedup30 wrote: »
    I have "resting [email protected]#h face". People have told me I come off as angry or [email protected]#hy because I don't smile like a goon all the time... Oh well. The people who know me know that is not the case :smiley:

    Oh I have this, too! Even when I try to smile, it looks like I'm holding in a big poop.
  • jcriscuolojcriscuolo Posts: 320Member Posts: 320Member
    It is in our nature to evaluate the person approaching. You present yourself in the way you wish to be perceived. Like the rich guy wearing old clothes. Or a shaved head with a beard. From there you have no control over the pre-judging that happens. It can be based on their personal experiences or based on the TV shows or movies they watch. You have no control over that.
    When I was new in the corporate world, I chose the have long hair and a beard. They kept me on night shift. When I shaved and cut my hair (sold out), I was promoted and moved to day shift. It was a lesson I learned early on. Present yourself in the way you wish to be perceived.
    An exception is when you are judged by race. That prejudice still exists and unfortunately there is nothing that one can do to change those prejudiced people.
  • sklarboddssklarbodds Posts: 611Member Member Posts: 611Member Member
    I'm sure I'm judged, but I'm not sure how it has affected me. I can plainly remember one day when I judged someone else completely wrong.

    It was my first week at a new job and these two beautiful tall girls were talking to each other, giggling, talking about make-up and shoes. I knew one of them and she wasn't particularly bright, so I assumed (based on their appearance and the 'airhead' type conversation) that the other was the same.

    Turns out (after I got to know her, and we're still friends 10 years later) she's brilliant and a PhD now (she was in school then working part time at the place I worked at). And I mean seriously brilliant. She also knows more than most guys about baseball (which is very attractive to me).

    I try not to make snap judgments anymore.
  • _Tink__Tink_ Posts: 3,877Member Member Posts: 3,877Member Member
    Yes. I picked up a second job a few months ago - just a simple retail position to help with bills. At work there, I wear jeans and the store t-shirt. I can't tell you how many customers talk down to me like I'm an idiot because I'm working in a low-paying retail position. Little do they know I have a masters degree and a former career with DoD.
  • EZDUZIT68EZDUZIT68 Posts: 1,171Member Member Posts: 1,171Member Member
    It's funny - having been on both sides of the spectrum, the very same people (some I've known for over 20 years) treat you so differently depending on how you look. Now, I'm getting invitations to go out for drinks; people come up and talk to me that never have before (especially women) and I feel like I'm viewed as being "smarter" all of a sudden - apparently I wasn't as smart when I was so out of shape.

    I try to give people the benefit of the doubt, though... while it's easy to blame it on their prejudices, I'm 100% sure that I was putting out a negative vibe when I was was heavy and less energetic - that "leave me alone, I'm not interested" sort of vibe, and that has a lot to do with how approachable someone is.
  • DavPulDavPul Posts: 61,895Member Member Posts: 61,895Member Member
    Who hasn't been judged by appearance? And who hasn't judged someone by the appearance? That's why Mother Nature saw fit to give us eyes.

    What's even the point of this thread? For us to pretend we don't have eyes? Or to wish other people didn't? We have five senses. It's fair to use them all.
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