Reasons to get fit... Girlfriend someday
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I dont to discourage anyone here but i really don't think girls care if a guys swole or not, i'm pretty sure it's the last thing they care about, plus if a girl wants to jump on you because you're jacked.... she's probably the kind you want to avoid anyway haha.
Disagree somewhat.
@Tomm88 you have 10/10 facial aesthetics. Something you have no control over. I'm positive girls want to jump you because of your handsome face, how is that any different from girls throwing themselves at jacked bros?
If your face (as a guy) isn't a 7/10 or better, being jacked help makes up for it.
At the OP, you don't have to be jacked at all to get a girl, but being jacked expands your opportunities by 100x
i disagree... a lot of women go deeper than just looks and physical , certain features in someones personality is more attractive to a woman.. men are more like monkey see and like then monkey do her.
Double disagree. Women have preferences as much as men (probably more)
You don't walk into a room and immediately say that guy has a great personality. He is sincere and true
You walk in and judge on aesthetics.
If face is good >then personality matters
if face is not good >then body matters >then personality
totally agree
face > physique (including height) > social status > personality
80/20 rule
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I'm a personality girl myself.... honestly, I can tell if I'm going to have a good time with someone or not.
Personality >Face>Physique.0 -
I know this sounds superficial, but I have to agree with @wishesonthestar and @strozman
Physical attraction may not be the ONLY thing, but it's generally the FIRST way we decide who to date or not date. Obviously, a person needs to have a good/compatible personality...but more often than not, the less attractive person (be it by face or body) is going to have less of a shot than the more attractive person, unless there's a way to meet someone's personality without seeing face/body. Most people are not interested in doing this. And in most situations, people aren't blindfolded....so they base their judgments on appearances.
Even on here, for the date thread (even though it's all in fun), people will say "I don't know. can't see their face" sometimes before actually answering whether they would date a person.
Also, keep in mind that physical attraction is subjective. People are attracted to different aspects, be it blondes, big boobs, 6-pack abs, lean frames, blue eyes, tanned skin. It doesn't make the person less attractive, just not right for that person...
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First impressions are always going to be superficial. Unless the first time you catch a glimpse of someone they are giving a TED talk, you're probably not going to immediately have a grasp of their wit, intellect, or kindhearted nature. You're going to spot them and think, oh they have nice hair, or great legs, or beautiful eyes...I'd like to get to know them better...to see if what's on the inside is as appealing as what I can see.
Most of us are looking for the same things beneath the surface. People who share our values, who can carry on a meaningful conversation, who make us feel good about ourselves. And if this stuff isn't there, it's going to be hard to build a lasting relationship.
It's great that you want to get in shape. And if being fitter improves your confidence (it's not a guarantee...sometimes it has the opposite effect, as you find yourself wondering how you compare to everyone else around, and worrying there's always going to be someone in better shape than you are)...that's great...because confidence is always sexy. And of course it's also good for your health.
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Confidence, body language and personality are key. You might get eye candy looks but if you can't keep the girl engaged in a conversation, you aren't gonna move forward. ONS on the other hand is easy.0
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Well said ilfaith i think in past when I liked a girl I'd have a small crush on them before hand and then after conversation is when I would fall for them. Maybe that's why ive ever been able to build long last relation due to not being able to share similar values, or they aren't laughing enough. I'm not quite sure so trying to be a gentleman, workout, be stylish and see if this changes things. I know when I'm confidence that's when life is the most fun so I just need to get back to getting out of comfort zone doing things in a group0
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FatFreeFrolicking wrote: »sweetdixie92 wrote: »FatFreeFrolicking wrote: »You're only 23. Why do you even want a girlfriend? Focus on you.
Why not? I know people who were married by then.
And you don't have to get fit to get a girl. Sure, you'll attract more girls in general, but there's no reason you can't right now either. I see super skinny, and super chunky, guys (and girls) who have a SO all the time.
I want to get fit for myself, mainly. At the same time, I want to have a boyfriend who wants to be active and fit as well, so I do understand where you're coming from.
Feel free to read my post to @gertudejekyl.
Personally, I don't know why anyone would want to be married at 23. Every single person I know who was married in their early 20s is either 1) terribly unhappy, 2) divorced, or 3) cheating on their SO. Most 20-23 year olds are in college and having flings with multiple people. Marriage is the last thing on their mind.
In my opinion and from what I have seen, men who get married in their early 20s are more likely to cheat because they begin to realize what a mistake it was to commit to one woman at such a young age. They begin to feel as though their SO took away their "freedom" years. I would never ever want to be the woman a man regrets because he feels as though I held him back from experiencing life and new people.
I believe a persons 20s are their 'selfish' years. It is a time to learn about yourself, travel, meet new people, experience new things, etc.
I believe that's the big problem. I guess maybe these days it's becoming more socially acceptable to act like a big baby in your 20s instead of growing up. I see no reason that someone can learn to actually be mature and care about people other than themselves by that age.
I guess maybe I'm one of the few who (anymore) has been taught that life doesn't revolve around me. No, there's no reason to get in a relationship if you really are NOT ready for it. And maybe he isn't. But if you find the right person, why not? Honestly, if I could take it all back, I'd be happier having saved myself for the guy I marry.0 -
FatFreeFrolicking wrote: »You're only 23. Why do you even want a girlfriend? Focus on you.
Consistent sex maybe?0 -
Capt_Apollo wrote: »I know plenty of guys and girls of all shapes and sizes that have had significant others. maybe it's not your weight... maybe its just you.
Yup Truth hurts.
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mumblemagic wrote: »
Agreed. People need snuggles and *snuggles*gertudejekyl wrote: »
ridiculousFatFreeFrolicking wrote: »You're only 23. Why do you even want a girlfriend? Focus on you.
. Girls can be fun!
ETA: OP, you probably don't need to work out stupid amounts to get a girlfriend. Esp. if you look like your profile pic. Just go talk to them. Join a sports club or hobby group or something to meet people you have something in common with. And go out with the lads and get drunk in bars with slutty girls, just in case you can do the one-night-stand-to-girlfriend conversion. But use protection. Don't get STDs.
LOL.
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I dont to discourage anyone here but i really don't think girls care if a guys swole or not, i'm pretty sure it's the last thing they care about, plus if a girl wants to jump on you because you're jacked.... she's probably the kind you want to avoid anyway haha.
Disagree somewhat.
@Tomm88 you have 10/10 facial aesthetics. Something you have no control over. I'm positive girls want to jump you because of your handsome face, how is that any different from girls throwing themselves at jacked bros?
If your face (as a guy) isn't a 7/10 or better, being jacked help makes up for it.
At the OP, you don't have to be jacked at all to get a girl, but being jacked expands your opportunities by 100x
i disagree... a lot of women go deeper than just looks and physical , certain features in someones personality is more attractive to a woman.. men are more like monkey see and like then monkey do her.
Double disagree. Women have preferences as much as men (probably more)
You don't walk into a room and immediately say that guy has a great personality. He is sincere and true
You walk in and judge on aesthetics.
If face is good >then personality matters
if face is not good >then body matters >then personality
People don't understand that usually about themselves too. Lets go talk to that girl at the college bar to find out her major. Like maybe but I 99% doubt it.
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sweetdixie92 wrote: »FatFreeFrolicking wrote: »sweetdixie92 wrote: »FatFreeFrolicking wrote: »You're only 23. Why do you even want a girlfriend? Focus on you.
Why not? I know people who were married by then.
And you don't have to get fit to get a girl. Sure, you'll attract more girls in general, but there's no reason you can't right now either. I see super skinny, and super chunky, guys (and girls) who have a SO all the time.
I want to get fit for myself, mainly. At the same time, I want to have a boyfriend who wants to be active and fit as well, so I do understand where you're coming from.
Feel free to read my post to @gertudejekyl.
Personally, I don't know why anyone would want to be married at 23. Every single person I know who was married in their early 20s is either 1) terribly unhappy, 2) divorced, or 3) cheating on their SO. Most 20-23 year olds are in college and having flings with multiple people. Marriage is the last thing on their mind.
In my opinion and from what I have seen, men who get married in their early 20s are more likely to cheat because they begin to realize what a mistake it was to commit to one woman at such a young age. They begin to feel as though their SO took away their "freedom" years. I would never ever want to be the woman a man regrets because he feels as though I held him back from experiencing life and new people.
I believe a persons 20s are their 'selfish' years. It is a time to learn about yourself, travel, meet new people, experience new things, etc.
I believe that's the big problem. I guess maybe these days it's becoming more socially acceptable to act like a big baby in your 20s instead of growing up. I see no reason that someone can learn to actually be mature and care about people other than themselves by that age.
I guess maybe I'm one of the few who (anymore) has been taught that life doesn't revolve around me. No, there's no reason to get in a relationship if you really are NOT ready for it. And maybe he isn't. But if you find the right person, why not? Honestly, if I could take it all back, I'd be happier having saved myself for the guy I marry.
@sweetdixie92 So focusing on things (education, career, traveling, volunteer work, etc) besides a relationship in your 20s means you are a big baby and immature? I disagree and think the exact opposite.
FYI, focusing on those things doesn't make a person egocentric. It means they have different priorities.0 -
yopeeps025 wrote: »FatFreeFrolicking wrote: »You're only 23. Why do you even want a girlfriend? Focus on you.
Consistent sex maybe?
I'm pretty sure you can have consistent sex without a relationship!0 -
Right on!leonidas_and_spartacus wrote: »Confidence, body language and personality are key. You might get eye candy looks but if you can't keep the girl engaged in a conversation, you aren't gonna move forward. ONS on the other hand is easy.
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FatFreeFrolicking wrote: »yopeeps025 wrote: »FatFreeFrolicking wrote: »You're only 23. Why do you even want a girlfriend? Focus on you.
Consistent sex maybe?
I'm pretty sure you can have consistent sex without a relationship!
Not with the same person usually. Emotions always develop between someone. Especially since OP is lacking somewhere that is not in the looks department.
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bump to see how OP doing.0
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Spoiler alert, us girlfriends aren't all we are cracked up to be. If you don't believe me look at your bank account then divide that in half, take a trip to your local shopping mall to observe the female species in action preferably near a makeup store and a Starbucks, then finish your day by leaving bobby pins and long strands of hair all over your house and cutting your closet size down by more than half and you have yourself a girlfriend.0
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Yo. Don't look for people who like you just because of your body. You'll do nothing but blame yourself if you slip up at some point. It's not worth it.
Do it so you can be in a healthy place regardless of relationship status.0 -
Losing weight to get a boyfriend/girlfriend is not the best reason in the world to do this. So many things change in addition to your body if you make the changes necessary to keep the weight off. It's important to remember that around 90% of people who diet to lose weight, end up gaining it back within a year.
Goodbye girlfriend/boyfriend.0
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