Stop the "I wish" body envying

AmerTunsi

I understand the underlining meaning of the message ; stop wishing to essentially be someone else, and to own your body for what it is. I think it is a great message. However (you knew that was coming), 'wishing' or envying another persons attributes can serve as a motivator for others. Hopefully, they'll take the steps to work towards that attribute, and in many cases when they're 'done' they'll find that they love their version of whatever they were seeking. People are going to be more body positive about their own bodies when they've worked hard to accomplish something that they wanted. There are plenty of studies that show the power of visualization or even the placebo response.

I will say that some things I thought weren't possible because I was built a certain way proved to be absolutely inaccurate. For example, I always hated having larger feet and after losing weight my feet shrunk and I was thrilled to be in the smaller size shoe.

I say as long as people aren't wishing and going after these body parts like Ed Gein - let them.

j6o4

Cant' believe people are standing up for envy. Let's defend greed and jealousy to... if anything, these things are self destructive and hurts you more than anyone else. I agree with the op. No one can attain perfection (or someone else's genetic attributes) , but everyone can attain greatness.

ninerbuff

sunglasses_and_ocean_waves wrote: »

ninerbuff wrote: »

sunglasses_and_ocean_waves wrote: »

Honestly, do you really think someone who says, "I wish I had her calves" just sits there wishing and not doing anything about it?

I wish for a lot of things in my life. Each step brings me closer to my goals. I wish for calves I may not be genetically predisposed to ever have, but I sure as heck am going to try.

One of my good friends has high insertion points on his calves. They look like Shawn Crawford's here in the middle:


He was doing every calf exercise 2 times a week for over a year to see if he could change their look. Well they did get stronger and slightly more defined, but it didn't change the shape at all. Now he just trains them on leg day and accepts them. Shawn Crawford will NEVER have the calves of the fellow runners with him, but he did train to beat them in races. Point is, one works with what they have to get the best out of what they have and not try to achieve a look that they aren't genetically predisposed to attaining.

A.C.E. Certified Personal and Group Fitness Trainer
IDEA Fitness member
Kickboxing Certified Instructor
Been in fitness for 30 years and have studied kinesiology and nutrition

So what?

The point is there. Can't explain it any more clearly if you don't see it.

A.C.E. Certified Personal and Group Fitness Trainer
IDEA Fitness member
Kickboxing Certified Instructor
Been in fitness for 30 years and have studied kinesiology and nutrition

ninerbuff

zyxst wrote: »

Oh well, I better stop doing what I'm doing because ninerbuff said so.

You're trying to look like Ace Ventura?

A.C.E. Certified Personal and Group Fitness Trainer
IDEA Fitness member
Kickboxing Certified Instructor
Been in fitness for 30 years and have studied kinesiology and nutrition

ninerbuff

SteampunkSongbird wrote: »

herrspoons wrote: »

SteampunkSongbird wrote: »

Me wishing I had another person's figure has zero effect on you or anyone else, so I'll go right on wistfully wishing. It's in most people's nature to compare ourselves to others who are perceived to be better, and wanting people to basically 'get over it' is about as easily done for them as trying to push a boiled egg through a keyhole intact, and the suggestion is about as useful. It's great that you're so accepting of yourself that you don't feel the need to wish for a change, I envy you that, but you can't seriously think that saying 'stop it, it's pointless' actually makes a difference to the way the majority of people think.

Yeah.... think you missed the point.

I really didn't. I'm very aware that there isn't much point wishing for something that genetically you won't ever have, you can't change your genes, and it's not very productive to wish that you could. It's a simple idea and I understand it. My point was only that it's human nature to want things that we don't have, and that the OP telling people that it's pointless to want a body you genetically can't achieve, is also pointless, as it's not going to change how anyone thinks. Most of us will probably never achieve a bank account with a billion quid in it, and we're all aware of that, doesn't mean we can't dream; and it doesn't hurt anyone else if we do, so some random person who has mastered self-acceptance has no right to tell those of us who haven't to basically 'buck up, it'll never happen anyway'. We KNOW it won't. These types of posts always just come across as condescending, to suggest that none of us know that our longings are often unachievable.

If you happen to search on threads on the forums, there are lots and lots of inquiries asking "how can I get thigh gap?", "how do I make my calves smaller?", "how do I get rid of my wide broad shoulders?" and so on looking for exercises or training regimens to convert their shape to another. Yes, there are people that actually believe that exercising a certain way can make that happen.
I'm not "imposing" my will on anyone, I'm informing them that what they are asking for isn't possible if their genetics don't allow for it. If it saves people some time and effort (especially if they are investing money into it, IE. corsets) from trying to do it, then that's not a bad thing.

A.C.E. Certified Personal and Group Fitness Trainer
IDEA Fitness member
Kickboxing Certified Instructor
Been in fitness for 30 years and have studied kinesiology and nutrition

999tigger

Tbf niner perspective and a sense of realism doesnt run strong in some people. Thats my non mean version.

When I started going to the gym I though oooh it would be nice to be a little less fat... move your *kitten* then and work harder...ok.