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We Broke Up Because....... part 2 .....
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She ate all my cookies0
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She never had any cookies.0
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She tried to give me a FYI hair cut0
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She brushed my hair while I slept. Oh wait, I like that. Come back!!!0
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didnt want to play footsie on the first date. Such a prude0
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Wouldn’t keep his feet to himself. Played footsie with the valet, maître d’, and the waitress 🙄0
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Caught him feeding the dog peanut butter off his toes and giggling0
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I think he has a secret life. Always gone 8am-6pm every single day! I got so lonely.0
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Put gps tracking....on my underwear. If I so much as pulled them down in the bathroom I got a call.0
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He mistook care for clingy.1
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He was always talking to his underwear. And not just a "hi there" but long drawn out conversations.0
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Secretly taped the "Underwear Dialogues". Turning it into a book and has a movie deal.0
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I got rich and famous and left him behind.0
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Her behind got rich and famous after appearing in The Underwear Monologues Couldn't go anywhere without her *kitten* being recognized0
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She said I was no longer worthy to be in her mere presence because she was famous and I was “just Cat”1
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He got injections to try and make his *kitten* look as good as mine. It went so overboard that he could no longer squeeze it inside my door to visit.0
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Ah, Hey now girl
Thats twice in two days I got to use that
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He said I went a little crazy with the spankings and he couldn't handle it. Apparently he likes to sit down sometimes.0
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Spanking wasnt hard enough1
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