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We Broke Up Because....... part 2 .....
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He spent all his time on craigslist and ebay searching for the rare RED hammer pants2
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He daydreamed and fantasized of another .. who wears gold hammer pants, I couldn't compete0
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Her fantasies frightened me.0
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Her breakfasts frightened me
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His teeth came out mid-chew.0
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Hated Andy Griffith 😡0
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Told lies 😮1
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We didn't,0
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We had entirely different schedules despite our shared passion for coffee and snuggles.0
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The private eye I hired came back with pics of her sharing coffee and snuggling with someone else 🕵️♀️0
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She spent all my money on hiring PIs. Those pictures showed me having coffee with my financial advisor and “snuggling” to her meant sitting 3ft apart at a crowded coffee shop.0
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Told me we could get freaky, but only from 3 feet away0
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told me we could get freaky, but only if whipped cream was involved0
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He wanted whip cream put in unusual places and just left it there. Didn’t wash it off for weeks. 🤢0
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Caught me eating the whipped cream. What?! It was still good. 😬0
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she was addicted to perineum sunning 🤣1
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He.. he.. omg 😭 what he did was awful. I just can't bring myself to say it.. I will never look at an eggbeater and rubber chicken the same again.0
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She did like the Three Stooges.0
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He kept calling me Moe when I was definitely a Larry.0
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PaperDoll_ wrote: »He kept calling me Moe when I was definitely a Larry.
Actually I thought you were more of a Shemp. 🤣🤣🤣0
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