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Husband cheated on me here

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Replies

  • Tayykisses
    Tayykisses Posts: 265 Member
    Tayykisses wrote: »
    Tayykisses wrote: »
    STLBADGIRL wrote: »
    Should have been putting out more and giving him more booty, admire his dick and body and I bet he won't be out there fooling around with other chicks.
    It is so irrational to not give him what he wants and then be mad if he gets it elsewhere. Wake up Woman!

    You are playing right? But I do hate the ego of a man :angry: :grumble:

    not playing, it happens time and time again..she needs to grab on to her husband and fulfill his needs even if she doesn't feel like it at times. Just like the man is supposed to take care of her needs.

    You've got to be kidding me. Just because you aren't *kitten* 24/7 doesnt mean you should cheat. Everyone doesnt want or need sex ALL THE TIME.

    When did TannedTiger say 24/7? He is right... if there isn't sexual contact, the relationship isn't going to work, I don't care what you say. Sex IS REQUIRED in a functioning relationship.

    Didn't say it wasn't. I'm married. I get that. But, if we were to go a few weeks and not have sex...I wouldnt go *kitten* someone else just because I needed some. LOYALTY. And if it's that bad, LEAVE. Don't cheat.

    If you go a few weeks every month, that adds up to be quite a bit.
    Or you may find out soon if you keep that attitude.

    You don't know my life. We have sex regularly. But we are also fine spending time together. We understand there are things to do to please each other without staying in the bed all the time ;)
  • Tayykisses
    Tayykisses Posts: 265 Member
    GymRatSF wrote: »
    Tayykisses wrote: »
    STLBADGIRL wrote: »
    Should have been putting out more and giving him more booty, admire his dick and body and I bet he won't be out there fooling around with other chicks.
    It is so irrational to not give him what he wants and then be mad if he gets it elsewhere. Wake up Woman!

    You are playing right? But I do hate the ego of a man :angry: :grumble:

    not playing, it happens time and time again..she needs to grab on to her husband and fulfill his needs even if she doesn't feel like it at times. Just like the man is supposed to take care of her needs.

    You've got to be kidding me. Just because you aren't *kitten* 24/7 doesnt mean you should cheat. Everyone doesnt want or need sex ALL THE TIME.

    Are we assuming that he is referring only to sex as a man's "needs"? I spent way too many years bending over backwards to meet my ex's needs and I couldn't even get her sit by me on the couch when we watched TV. For me that was a need. And no I didn't cheat because of it as that still doesn't make cheating right.

    Yep. Needs and sexual needs aren't mutually exclusive. ^^^^
    Too often that's what gets emphasized when a man says his needs aren't getting met though.
    Damn shame people don't listen better.

    His first comment said "she should have put out more booty" so, its a DAMN shame you didn't read that ;)
  • LeGaCyGiAnT91
    LeGaCyGiAnT91 Posts: 405 Member
    Tayykisses wrote: »
    Tayykisses wrote: »
    Tayykisses wrote: »
    STLBADGIRL wrote: »
    Should have been putting out more and giving him more booty, admire his dick and body and I bet he won't be out there fooling around with other chicks.
    It is so irrational to not give him what he wants and then be mad if he gets it elsewhere. Wake up Woman!

    You are playing right? But I do hate the ego of a man :angry: :grumble:

    not playing, it happens time and time again..she needs to grab on to her husband and fulfill his needs even if she doesn't feel like it at times. Just like the man is supposed to take care of her needs.

    You've got to be kidding me. Just because you aren't *kitten* 24/7 doesnt mean you should cheat. Everyone doesnt want or need sex ALL THE TIME.

    When did TannedTiger say 24/7? He is right... if there isn't sexual contact, the relationship isn't going to work, I don't care what you say. Sex IS REQUIRED in a functioning relationship.

    Didn't say it wasn't. I'm married. I get that. But, if we were to go a few weeks and not have sex...I wouldnt go *kitten* someone else just because I needed some. LOYALTY. And if it's that bad, LEAVE. Don't cheat.

    Congratulations. No offense, but in today's society, marriage is nothing more than a piece of paper (as the OP found out). Another big thing is communication. I haven't read through the 14 pages of this page start to finish, but if the OP's husband brought it up more than once that they have needs and still wasn't getting any then there draws the problem. There is no real answer to this. I am not saying what the OP's husband did was right (there is always two sides to the story), I just know that if the relationship is one sided, a person can only try so much to get the other's attention. Getting turned down only works so many times before it's the last straw and the cheating happens...

    My marriage is NOT just a piece of paper just because of this screwed up society we live in. My marriage is a commitment. It's pathetic that people have these views and I will honestly hope and pray for all of you, that when you end up married, if you're not already, your partners don't share these views, because you will be in for a world of pain that apparently you "deserve" for not submitting to their every single want and desire. I'm done here because it doesn't concern me, I'm just blown away by the ignorance and selfishness of people. Have a good day!

    I wasn't speaking for the minority... just giving the truth in today's society. Marriage/relationships are a commitment... a big one if you care to make it work. Again, I am not directing this towards you in anyway, just stating the facts.

    Overall, something the OP's husband wasn't getting was why he was seeking elsewhere. Whether he brought it up to the OP, we don't know, but I am just stating the obvious. Communication was the downfall here IMO.
  • LiftingRiot
    LiftingRiot Posts: 6,952 Member
    newmeadow wrote: »
    newmeadow wrote: »
    ericatoday wrote: »
    Yeah social media is one of the leading causes of divorce now. There's so many temptations and people are weak. I don't believe we were suppose to be made monogamous but someone along the way said its what we should do. I'm sorry he hurt you and I hope you stand strong.

    Someone also along the way said we should: eat food with utensils rather than with our hands, use a toilet for urine and defecation and flush it, wear clothes when in public, refrain from gratuitously striking people when we feel angry, develop written languages and become literate in them, and not have sex openly in public places.

    None of this comes naturally to humans per se, but it's learned in the course of the civilizing process. As is monogamy for the religions, cultures, and individuals that recognize value in it.

    Obviously, we didnt learn to well then did we. Even with them religions, cultures, and individuals you speak of. It was learned so people wouldnt kill each other because peeps get jealous and are controlling.

    These religions you speak of, what kind of rights do women have in these religions typically??? Any??

    I'm not taking the religious bait, but feel free to research which religion(s) are responsible for the creation and development of Western culture, and the legal system(s) enjoyed in modern Western culture. The fruits thereof which have done more to free women of the shackles of indentured servitude and gender based enslavement (of all varieties) than any other. Feel free to compare Western culture, and the predominant religion(s) associated with it, to non Western cultures and the predominant religions associated with them.

    Also, Western culture allows for people to live freely with no religious affiliation whatsoever, and, as in your case, allows for the free expression of anti religious sentiment without cultural backlash.

    So none. Read you loud and clear.
  • Tayykisses
    Tayykisses Posts: 265 Member
    captbklee wrote: »
    Tayykisses wrote: »
    Tayykisses wrote: »
    Motorsheen wrote: »
    Tayykisses wrote: »
    STLBADGIRL wrote: »
    Should have been putting out more and giving him more booty, admire his dick and body and I bet he won't be out there fooling around with other chicks.
    It is so irrational to not give him what he wants and then be mad if he gets it elsewhere. Wake up Woman!

    You are playing right? But I do hate the ego of a man :angry: :grumble:

    not playing, it happens time and time again..she needs to grab on to her husband and fulfill his needs even if she doesn't feel like it at times. Just like the man is supposed to take care of her needs.

    You've got to be kidding me. Just because you aren't *kitten* 24/7 doesnt mean you should cheat. Everyone doesnt want or need sex ALL THE TIME.

    Begs the question:
    How much is too much?

    And...

    Not enough?

    Or...

    The right amount?

    That's beside the point. If your partner isn't in the mood, they shouldnt feel like they NEED to satisfy you because they're afraid you're gonna go screw someone else. The problem with people is commitment. Apparently people don't understand their vows.

    Not making an effort to make your partner happy is a good enough reason for him/her to seek other options. Whether it is in form of sex, attention or romance.

    That's *kitten*! Once you are married, and you took those vows, I don't give a damn what happens, you DO NOT CHEAT ON THEM. Leave them, but don't cheat. That is one of the lowest things a person can do to someone. And you don't know this lady, she could have been doing all of this, and for some men (and women) it is NEVER enough and they'll ALWAYS use that *kitten* line of "I didn't feel loved". Grow the hell up.

    How is leaving better than cheating? That's just pride "messing" with you.

    Because if someone doesn't love you enough to make you their ONLY you're stupid for staying. Not pride.
  • Ben_there_done_that
    Ben_there_done_that Posts: 732 Member
    Does anyone else kind of wish she would come back like Willy Wonka? "I said Good Day!"
  • Motorsheen
    Motorsheen Posts: 20,233 Member
    ChrisNels1 wrote: »
    Should have been putting out more and giving him more booty, admire his dick and body and I bet he won't be out there fooling around with other chicks.
    It is so irrational to not give him what he wants and then be mad if he gets it elsewhere. Wake up Woman!

    And right here is the real problem.

    don't poke him...he's a tiger.

    Actually, he might be okay with a poke or two.
  • Ben_there_done_that
    Ben_there_done_that Posts: 732 Member
    lstrat115 wrote: »
    captbklee wrote: »
    Tayykisses wrote: »
    Tayykisses wrote: »
    Motorsheen wrote: »
    Tayykisses wrote: »
    STLBADGIRL wrote: »
    Should have been putting out more and giving him more booty, admire his dick and body and I bet he won't be out there fooling around with other chicks.
    It is so irrational to not give him what he wants and then be mad if he gets it elsewhere. Wake up Woman!

    You are playing right? But I do hate the ego of a man :angry: :grumble:

    not playing, it happens time and time again..she needs to grab on to her husband and fulfill his needs even if she doesn't feel like it at times. Just like the man is supposed to take care of her needs.

    You've got to be kidding me. Just because you aren't *kitten* 24/7 doesnt mean you should cheat. Everyone doesnt want or need sex ALL THE TIME.

    Begs the question:
    How much is too much?

    And...

    Not enough?

    Or...

    The right amount?

    That's beside the point. If your partner isn't in the mood, they shouldnt feel like they NEED to satisfy you because they're afraid you're gonna go screw someone else. The problem with people is commitment. Apparently people don't understand their vows.

    Not making an effort to make your partner happy is a good enough reason for him/her to seek other options. Whether it is in form of sex, attention or romance.

    That's *kitten*! Once you are married, and you took those vows, I don't give a damn what happens, you DO NOT CHEAT ON THEM. Leave them, but don't cheat. That is one of the lowest things a person can do to someone. And you don't know this lady, she could have been doing all of this, and for some men (and women) it is NEVER enough and they'll ALWAYS use that *kitten* line of "I didn't feel loved". Grow the hell up.

    How is leaving better than cheating? That's just pride "messing" with you.

    Really? Leaving allows both people to move on and find someone they want to be with and that makes them happy. Cheating leaves one person in a tangled web and the other believing that everything is fine until they find out their SO has been screwing someone else for months or years.

    Duh, my bad. I assumed that cheating would inevitably either lead to leaving or marriage counseling. I don't know why I didn't consider the ongoing cheating being a secret. Things never stay hidden forever, anyway.
  • browneyedgirl749
    browneyedgirl749 Posts: 4,984 Member
    Not that anyone asked, but here is my $.02.

    Marriage should never be entered into lightly. The intention is to have that be your life partner, thru thick and thin, good and bad. The intention of monogamy should be there. If it strays from that, it should be something you both agree on.

    A relationship should not revolve around sex, but it is an important part. Everyone has physical needs. If your spouse goes months saying they aren't in the mood, there is something wrong with the situation. That is when changing things up is imperative. If your partner is physically unsatisfied, stepping out is almost a given.
  • MommysLittleMeatball
    MommysLittleMeatball Posts: 2,067 Member
    Tayykisses wrote: »
    Tayykisses wrote: »
    Tayykisses wrote: »
    STLBADGIRL wrote: »
    Should have been putting out more and giving him more booty, admire his dick and body and I bet he won't be out there fooling around with other chicks.
    It is so irrational to not give him what he wants and then be mad if he gets it elsewhere. Wake up Woman!

    You are playing right? But I do hate the ego of a man :angry: :grumble:

    not playing, it happens time and time again..she needs to grab on to her husband and fulfill his needs even if she doesn't feel like it at times. Just like the man is supposed to take care of her needs.

    You've got to be kidding me. Just because you aren't *kitten* 24/7 doesnt mean you should cheat. Everyone doesnt want or need sex ALL THE TIME.

    When did TannedTiger say 24/7? He is right... if there isn't sexual contact, the relationship isn't going to work, I don't care what you say. Sex IS REQUIRED in a functioning relationship.

    Didn't say it wasn't. I'm married. I get that. But, if we were to go a few weeks and not have sex...I wouldnt go *kitten* someone else just because I needed some. LOYALTY. And if it's that bad, LEAVE. Don't cheat.

    Congratulations. No offense, but in today's society, marriage is nothing more than a piece of paper (as the OP found out). Another big thing is communication. I haven't read through the 14 pages of this page start to finish, but if the OP's husband brought it up more than once that they have needs and still wasn't getting any then there draws the problem. There is no real answer to this. I am not saying what the OP's husband did was right (there is always two sides to the story), I just know that if the relationship is one sided, a person can only try so much to get the other's attention. Getting turned down only works so many times before it's the last straw and the cheating happens...

    My marriage is NOT just a piece of paper just because of this screwed up society we live in. My marriage is a commitment. It's pathetic that people have these views and I will honestly hope and pray for all of you, that when you end up married, if you're not already, your partners don't share these views, because you will be in for a world of pain that apparently you "deserve" for not submitting to their every single want and desire. I'm done here because it doesn't concern me, I'm just blown away by the ignorance and selfishness of people. Have a good day!

    I wasn't speaking for the minority... just giving the truth in today's society. Marriage/relationships are a commitment... a big one if you care to make it work. Again, I am not directing this towards you in anyway, just stating the facts.

    Overall, something the OP's husband wasn't getting was why he was seeking elsewhere. Whether he brought it up to the OP, we don't know, but I am just stating the obvious. Communication was the downfall here IMO.

    You actually don't know that at all. There are plenty of people that get everything they need and want more or they have self-esteem issues (not at the fault of their SO) that make them crave constant attention or they have a fetish or they are just a shitsandwich. There are plenty of explanations or possibilities, none of which any of us know for sure.
  • Nova
    Nova Posts: 7,888 MFP Staff
    Dear posters,

    I wanted to offer a brief explanation for closing this topic. The original poster has received a significant amount of feedback and the conversations can continue via personal messaging or within a group.

    Thank you for your understanding and help in keeping MyFitnessPal a supportive, friendly community.

    Respectfully,
    Nova
    MFP Community Staff
This discussion has been closed.