Avidkeo wrote: »
Thanks guys. I feel like a huge weight off me today, knowing I wasn't going to be seeing him again. I didn't realise how much anxiety I was feeling.
I kinda blew up at DH this morning because he made a comment to me: he "couldn't understand why I would get myself into that position". Well as someone who had been abused as a 13yr old where the same manipulation tactics were used, that was the worst thing he could say to me. And this morning my fear, embarrassment, anxiety and shock boiled into a throw down angry yelling session about how offensive and hurtful what he said was. He still didn't get it. A lovely lady at work reminded me that men don't get it, and they arent raises the same as women. Well he got pizza for dinner because he thought I would like it. So I think he feels bad. Not bad enough to apologise (sigh) but it's something. And I'm letting it go. I guess it's nice he doesn't get it?
RunsOnEspresso wrote: »
Sadly, most men won't get it. The thing is women are raised to be kind and polite to everyone. We are raised to obey our elders etc. It's what's expected of girls and women in patriarchal society. To be docile. To be agreeable. To be there for men to look at, have, possess.
To quote my favorite murder, *kitten* politeness.
To quote the viral tiktok to the tune of if you're happy and you know it
Don't be polite to men who creep you out 👏🏻👏🏻
And sometimes when *kitten* happens it shocks us that we don't know how to react so we don't. Or we revert to that be polite to everyone. And that's ok too. It's a trauma response.
You did nothing wrong. The old man did. He knew exactly what he was doing. He was a creepy old man trying to manipulate you and getting what he wanted at your expense.
And your husband is being a butt. 😉
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