Less Alcohol - March 2018- One day at a Time

lporter229

@MaryBethHempel - Wow, Fantastic job!!!

I always love checking in on this page on Saturdays. Friday evening were always the night when I tended to drink the most, unwinding from the week and all. I have not had a hangover on a Saturday morning in months and it feels so darn good. An AF Friday night and I love it. Already met my group for an 11 mile run and ready to tackle some house work.

It is snowing and we are going to cook dinner together tonight. We will probably split a bottle of wine. I will make sure that my hubby gets the larger pours

kittybenn

@JulieAL1969 - so appreciate all the videos and other resources you share here. I've gotten a lot out of every one, so thanks. Speaking of resources, I've had this book recommended to me: A Happier Hour by Rebecca Weller. I read the free sample, and it's pretty interesting. About a young woman, a health coach no less, who had a serious drinking problem and had to give up alcohol. From the description: A Happier Hour is a memoir that moves beyond addiction, giving a behind-the-scenes look into what it takes to get (and stay) sober in a culture that celebrates alcohol.

I liked the part about a "culture that celebrates alcohol." SO true.

@Norminv - you've practiced your moderation muscles a bunch so have fun on your trip - sounds like a blast!
@erikNJ - my mind is blown by those steps - insane. But congrats - just amazing.

Friday's a moderate drinking day for me. We went out to dinner last night. I had one glass of really good Malbec. I enjoyed it, but had no trouble at all saying no to a second. I did have a headache this a.m. This is the second weekend in a row that's happened, and I'm beginning to think that that little amount of wine is the culprit. Crazy to think of the quantities I used to drink!

Hope everybody's having a good weekend. Enjoying catching up with your posts.

RubyRed427

kittybenn wrote: »

@JulieAL1969 - so appreciate all the videos and other resources you share here. I've gotten a lot out of every one, so thanks. Speaking of resources, I've had this book recommended to me: A Happier Hour by Rebecca Weller. I read the free sample, and it's pretty interesting. About a young woman, a health coach no less, who had a serious drinking problem and had to give up alcohol. From the description: A Happier Hour is a memoir that moves beyond addiction, giving a behind-the-scenes look into what it takes to get (and stay) sober in a culture that celebrates alcohol.

I liked the part about a "culture that celebrates alcohol." SO true.

@Norminv - you've practiced your moderation muscles a bunch so have fun on your trip - sounds like a blast!
@erikNJ - my mind is blown by those steps - insane. But congrats - just amazing.

Friday's a moderate drinking day for me. We went out to dinner last night. I had one glass of really good Malbec. I enjoyed it, but had no trouble at all saying no to a second. I did have a headache this a.m. This is the second weekend in a row that's happened, and I'm beginning to think that that little amount of wine is the culprit. Crazy to think of the quantities I used to drink!

Hope everybody's having a good weekend. Enjoying catching up with your posts.

Thanks for the book suggestion! I need a new one to read. I love your posts! And I'm happy you had a nice dinner and a good Malbec. Sorry about the headache. Maybe it's allergies.

Trinkwasser

Staying sober today! Glad I found this thread

salleewins

Keep going @Trinkwasser! We are behind you!

snoo61

To all the new people, let us know how you are dealing with your cut back or cut out of alcohol. Sharing ideas helps us all.
All of us that have been here a while should share what we've done in the past.
New people are joining, lets give them the book titles, alternative drinks, etc.!

I'll start: the 6 second rule. If you want a drink (or another one), find something to do for at least 6 seconds. It gives you time to think.

RubyRed427

Good morning or evening my friends! Had a delicious drink last night at a trendy restaurant. I was pleasantly suprised that they had a whole page of non alcoholic options. They had sodas of all kinds (homemade), tons of different coffee drinks and the best part was unique blends of tea hot or cold. So, I ordered a hibiscus tea; it came with a glass of ice and a little teapot with the leaves brewing. It made me feel special.

My other tablemates had beautiful old fashioned drinks and wine and beer, but I must say I did enjoy my AF drink Because of the presentation probably.

I can sense this thread is losing a little steam. January was a turning point for many; February had the positive January energy, and in March some friends started to fade in comments and urgency. But Like @snoo61 aptly said, it's time to rev it up again. Get that momentum going and motivation for the new friends who are joining. Let's stay strong and keep posting. We love hearing from you. Let's start with books reviews. Let us know your favorite ones... no need for a long post just keep the topic alive.

Love you all! This thread has been a huge support for me in my AF goals. Also, to any beginners, moderation is also a beautiful goal. Determine how much you want to drink or not drink in a week, share with us your thoughts, and we will cheer you on. Xoxo

RubyRed427

Favorite books:
Alcohol Lied to me by Craig Beck - havent finished this yet, but I love this author's youtube channels. No-nonsense guy
Drinking: A love Story by Caroline Knapp - A narrative about a successful writer whose life is severely impacted by alcohol- you may see some of yourself in her, while you may also say to yourself that you aren't THAT bad.:)
This Naked Mind by Annie Grace- go online and sign up to get her newsletters. Watch her youtubes. She's like your best friend, encouraging and supportive.
Blackout: Remember the things I drank to forget

For those of you starting to reduce alcohol, please arm yourself with books, blogs and videos. You'll need them for motivation. Treat this like a college course; stay educated, learn more, journal and let us know what you're struggling with. Xo

MissMay

@Julie: That is such a moving video you posted. I especially like his comparison to taking a drink is like taking a step off a cliff...there is NO little step off a cliff.

@salleewins: that was a horrible situation your client put you in. I hope you gave her some strong advice.

@Norm: Fingers crossed on your ocean voyage goals.

@erik: that is some serious foot mileage. LOL great job.

* A helpful suggestion for new posters is ACCOUNTABILITY. It is OK to let other people know your redesigned drinking goals. The more people you tell the better and tell them why. Be honest with yourself, because that is where it all starts. Within ourselves.

RubyRed427

@MissMay Great suggestion. Accountability!
Thanks for sharing your ideas.
Yes, I agree, Craig Beck says you have to realized that alcohol does nothing for you. It lies to you. He's so great. And so are you! Xo

RubyRed427

@salleewins I am happy you also resisted that temptation to get something when you drove your friend. You are strong! Xo

ehseeker

Well, I blew it this week. Instead of 3 drinks I went through the better part of a bottle of wine over a 4 day period, then had some Irish whiskey on Friday night, woke up feeling not so great on Saturday and then went out for lunch and drinks yesterday. Felt like crap (only word for it) before I went to bed last night. Woke up ok but disappointed. I, and my body, deserve better. Planning on the next 5 days being AF. Small goals. It is an eye opener for me how easy it is to blow it.

RubyRed427

ehseeker wrote: »

Well, I blew it this week. Instead of 3 drinks I went through the better part of a bottle of wine over a 4 day period, then had some Irish whiskey on Friday night, woke up feeling not so great on Saturday and then went out for lunch and drinks yesterday. Felt like crap (only word for it) before I went to bed last night. Woke up ok but disappointed. I, and my body, deserve better. Planning on the next 5 days being AF. Small goals. It is an eye opener for me how easy it is to blow it.

Your honesty always makes me smile. You are so wonderful to be so candid. I would be doing the same thing as you. Once you drank that bottle, it was like a roller coaster ride. BUT you recognize it today that you deserve better. And this week will be great! You'll have those memories fresh in your mind. Maybe even write yourself a note like our other friend did, detailing how badly you feel and tuck it away. Sending you a hug!

WinoGelato

Great ideas to circle back and share what has worked, as well as our own successes and failures in the last few months. I totally agree with the suggestion about accountability - posting your goals, your plans, and your results.

I know a few are using an app to track the number of days AF, and then how many drinks on the days they do imbibe. I’m doing it the old fashioned way with a tally sheet next to my bed with three columns: AF, A, #. My Jan was an eye opener to me, I found this thread midway through the month and when I went back and tracked my intake I was embarrassed to post it at first. My Feb was purposeful and far more moderate with a couple of work related indulgences. March so far is about the same as Feb, but it’s about to go even higher as I leave tomorrow for an all inclusive trip to Mexico. What I still feel really good about is my goal to engage in Mindful Moderation. The days I drink, I’ve known ahead of time that I would, and I’ve had an idea of how much I would consume. Just this past week I ordered one extra glass of wine beyond my plan but I thought about it carefully before I did it and knew that it would stop there. An all inclusive will be a little tougher but I’m with my family, and my husband doesn’t drink, so I’m planning to space things out, try some of the virgin drinks that he and my kids will be enjoying, and not make it an all day and all night drink fest.

RubyRed427

Cringeworthy memory: Last Easter Sunday, I celebrated with Jesus and my family way too much. At our Easter dinner, I drank a whole bottle of wine, ate very little, had a vodka or two, and guess what? I was worshipping at the porcelain alter by 8 p.m. That's how bad I was with alcohol. Even my husband was disgusted with me, and he tends to be quite patient. I felt like such a fool. After the guests left, I laid on that bathroom floor begging God to kill me. I was so upset that I couldnt handle my alcohol, but everyone else seems to be able to. It is a miserable feeling to be sick from alcohol. Just being honest with all of you. Xo

This Easter, I will be sure to make a delicious AF cocktail for myself a few other family members who do not drink. I will be enjoying the celebration sober. Imagine how far we can come in a year. I know the alcohol demon is always looking for me, but this year I am way ahead of him.

ehseeker

JulieAL1969 wrote: »

ehseeker wrote: »

Well, I blew it this week. Instead of 3 drinks I went through the better part of a bottle of wine over a 4 day period, then had some Irish whiskey on Friday night, woke up feeling not so great on Saturday and then went out for lunch and drinks yesterday. Felt like crap (only word for it) before I went to bed last night. Woke up ok but disappointed. I, and my body, deserve better. Planning on the next 5 days being AF. Small goals. It is an eye opener for me how easy it is to blow it.

Your honesty always makes me smile. You are so wonderful to be so candid. I would be doing the same thing as you. Once you drank that bottle, it was like a roller coaster ride. BUT you recognize it today that you deserve better. And this week will be great! You'll have those memories fresh in your mind. Maybe even write yourself a note like our other friend did, detailing how badly you feel and tuck it away. Sending you a hug!

Yes! The idea of the note is genius. I'm going to do it. Thanks for the reminder.

ehseeker

JulieAL1969 wrote: »

Cringeworthy memory: Last Easter Sunday, I celebrated with Jesus and my family way too much. At our Easter dinner, I drank a whole bottle of wine, ate very little, had a vodka or two, and guess what? I was worshipping at the porcelain alter by 8 p.m. That's how bad I was with alcohol. Even my husband was disgusted with me, and he tends to be quite patient. I felt like such a fool. After the guests left, I laid on that bathroom floor begging God to kill me. I was so upset that I couldnt handle my alcohol, but everyone else seems to be able to. It is a miserable feeling to be sick from alcohol. Just being honest with all of you. Xo

This Easter, I will be sure to make a delicious AF cocktail for myself a few other family members who do not drink. I will be enjoying the celebration sober. Imagine how far we can come in a year. I know the alcohol demon is always looking for me, but this year I am way ahead of him.

I'm wondering how many people would opt for something af if it were available. Maybe something to drink after having some booze. I decided I wanted inspiration so here are some recipes. If anyone tries them please post about it. https://www.tablespoon.com/posts/20-non-alcoholic-party-drinks-everyone-will-love

I like the spritzer with the frozen grapes. Think I'll try that.

MissMay

JulieAL1969 wrote: »

Cringeworthy memory

Excellent use of words.
Can I just comment that I have been on that floor "with you" more times than I care to recall. Not the way I had planned to grow up and adult by being passed out beside a toilet. I totally ruined my 1st year Anniversay celebration 4 years ago by having to much fun that day/night, that ran over me like a freight train.

You will be the rock star this Easter and you will make everyone proud. Hugs

@ehseeker: this was me this past week completely. One led to another and before it was all over I was toast. Keep positive with this new day.

RubyRed427

@ehseeker Totally agree with you. I think because I had a plethora of AF choices, I felt special and "Like an adult". It didn't make me feel like I was ordering a Shirley Temple. LOL xo

kittybenn

Wow, @JulieAL1969, if only more restaurants were like that. I keep saying that I need to start some kind of sober bar - not the (to me) somewhat somber kind where people have AA meetings, but the fun kind with a party atmosphere that feels like a bar, with amazing AF drinks (tea, cool sodas, sparkling waters, juices, smoothies, coffee, kombucha - you name it), games, music -- the whole bit. Of course, I'm the type of person who thinks that because I'm into something the whole world must be, right? LOL.

@ehseeker - oh, you are so right, it's easy to blow it. But the most important thing is that you're here and you have a new plan. It takes so much mental and emotional energy to beat yourself up over something that's in the past and that you can't change. I'm hoping you can turn all that energy toward your own future health and wellbeing. Thinking about you.

@snoo61 - love that idea. What's helping me is saying to myself or to friends/family a version of "I don't do X anymore." Or perhaps a more positive version, which might be what you DO do ("I'm AF free now.") The more I say it the more I believe it, I guess. It sort of redefines me - to myself, most importantly. I remember once, about six months, ago my husband wanted to go to a donut place. I was shocked to hear this coming out of my mouth: "I don't eat donuts anymore, but I'd love to go with you and have a cup of coffee." So . . . I'm a person who doesn't eat donuts now. I'm also a person who doesn't drink Mon-Thurs. and drinks no more than two glasses of wine Fri-Sun. May be too airy, but wanted to throw that out.