Corniest Jokes/Puns

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  • beastier
    beastier Posts: 1,908 Member
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    It’s been raining for hours & My wife’s mother has been staring through the window for ages - if it keeps on much longer I’ll have to let her into the house
  • beastier
    beastier Posts: 1,908 Member
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    My town just had its annual incest competition...

    I entered my sister!
  • Beaster_Bunny
    Beaster_Bunny Posts: 501 Member
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    A skunk walks into the courtroom.
    The judge says "odor in the court"
  • beastier
    beastier Posts: 1,908 Member
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    I’m fed up with my mates, Three times now they have agreed to go to a Whitesnake gig with me and then not showed up.

    Here I go again on my own.
  • PangPangPrincess109
    PangPangPrincess109 Posts: 63 Member
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    Why did the cook go to jail? Because he beat the eggs and whipped the cream.
  • cee134
    cee134 Posts: 33,711 Member
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    I don't really understand the function of a coin press...
    But I guess it makes cents.
  • beastier
    beastier Posts: 1,908 Member
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    "What do we want!?"

    "HEARING AIDS!!!"

    "When do we want them!?"

    "HEARING AIDS!!!"
  • beastier
    beastier Posts: 1,908 Member
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    Went to the sperm clinic earlier.
    The lady asked if I'd like to *kitten* in the cup?

    I said 'I'm good but not ready for competition yet'
  • AmberGlitterSparkles
    AmberGlitterSparkles Posts: 699 Member
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    Guy: I was gonna tell you a joke about my *kitten* but it’s too long!

    Girl :that’s funny because I was going to tell you a joke about my *kitten* but you’ll never get it.
  • BrSpiritus
    BrSpiritus Posts: 190 Member
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    I totally understand how batteries feel because I’m rarely ever included in things either.
  • LosinIt54
    LosinIt54 Posts: 37 Member
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    How do you catch a squirrel.....climb up a tree and act like a nut.
  • DoubleUbea
    DoubleUbea Posts: 1,115 Member
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    How do you know Abraham Lincoln was Jewish?

    He was shot in the temple.
  • DoubleUbea
    DoubleUbea Posts: 1,115 Member
    edited July 2018
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    My avatar is an actual picture of me, I have big ears, a big smile, and... gray hare.

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