Less Alcohol- May 2018- One Day at a Time
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Just found this thread today. I'm in for May and June!
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@erikNj, good to see you. I’ll bet there are extremely few here who can’t identify with you. I know I can. For myself the roller coaster of successfully going AF followed by a period of drinking more than I want to is disheartening until I realize that 6 months ago there were no “up” periods at all.
I once had a professor tell a very discouraged me that the C I received “validated” all my A’s. I think of this journey the same way. If it were all easy smooth sailing we wouldn’t be the heroes we are.
We can do this!!8 -
I need this group right now. I am spiraling back to my pre-January ways
Last week I had a bad weekend and I was determined to get on track, and Monday I did. Then I lost it again. I ate very unhealthy Tuesday through Sunday. Tue and Wed I had just two drinks each night, but that is two more than someone who is planning on only Saturday drinking should have. Thur, Fri and Sun I got completely trashed each night. Ironically Saturday is the only day I didnt drink ...
In the first four months this year I have handled not drinking at work events very well. But this weekend there were two events and I got really out of control.
I have become very uncharacteristic of the new me I’ve become so proud of. And honestly I feel like I’ve behaved even worse than I used to in my old ways ...
Here is to hoping all of your inspirational stories can get me back on the right path
Considering it has only been 2 weeks since I went off the rails and I have one victory under my belt I am not so sure how much you should listen to me. We are all just trying to figure this thing out as we go I think. I have thought quite a bit about it in the last 2 weeks though. I realize now that just like you I have proven I have the ability to moderate myself and that doesn't go away because I slipped and fell. I have more of a choice than the drinking part of me wanted to admit. Since realizing this the urge to drink has been mitigated (for now at least).6 -
I’m 2 months sober today! Feeling happy and proud. Hasn’t been easy, but worth it!14
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Working out and listening to AF videos -
This one is from a young woman - probably in her 20s.
https://youtu.be/VB5WyBeFc8U 4 -
Day 1 - Re-Boot!!! I am getting back into the AF lifestyle... want to feel good again, waking up without guilt... boy do I have a lot of reading to do, I have been away from this group for a bit, tons of posts to read. Hope you are all doing well.
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I watched a good youtube today and the guy said being AF is a solo journey. I think he may be right. Yes, we do have this thread as inspiration, but when we are home and behind close doors, it's just you and your thoughts.
Yes, we can go to therapy or AA or another support group, but when it comes down to it, I either put alcohol in my mouth or don't. It's not as simple as I am making it to be, I know.
One of the things that helped me abstain for a few months was declining several party invitations. I think you have to go underground for a little while. Fill your time up with non-alcohol things. Change your routines. Become more introspective.
Having said that, now that I decided to moderate once in awhile, that once in awhile is starting to become a little too often for my liking. Something I have to think about. Xo6 -
I agree that it is a solo journey. The fight is internal. Wouldn't it be great though if we could collectively pool our strength to help when someone is feeling vulnerable? I know I could have used a boost at times.
I really appreciate this thread and the people in it. It is nice to have a place to talk things out and support one another even if we still have to ultimately face ourselves alone in battle.7 -
Oh man! I hope this thread continues into June.
My husband and I are big craft beer drinkers and drink way too frequently. I believe this is the* major reason for my weight gain.
I have long wanted to abstain for longer periods to see how I feel. To have new habits and ways of relaxing and enjoying myself, but I've repeatedly fallen into these bad patterns over and over. This group seems perfect - just what I need.7 -
Oh man! I hope this thread continues into June.
My husband and I are big craft beer drinkers and drink way too frequently. I believe this is the* major reason for my weight gain.
I have long wanted to abstain for longer periods to see how I feel. To have new habits and ways of relaxing and enjoying myself, but I've repeatedly fallen into these bad patterns over and over. This group seems perfect - just what I need.
Welcome. I think it is safe to say this thread will be reborn again in June.
There are many shades of moderation and temporary to permanent abstinence in this group. Whatever "less" means to you initially we will support.4 -
I need this group right now. I am spiraling back to my pre-January ways
Last week I had a bad weekend and I was determined to get on track, and Monday I did. Then I lost it again. I ate very unhealthy Tuesday through Sunday. Tue and Wed I had just two drinks each night, but that is two more than someone who is planning on only Saturday drinking should have. Thur, Fri and Sun I got completely trashed each night. Ironically Saturday is the only day I didnt drink ...
In the first four months this year I have handled not drinking at work events very well. But this weekend there were two events and I got really out of control.
I have become very uncharacteristic of the new me I’ve become so proud of. And honestly I feel like I’ve behaved even worse than I used to in my old ways ...
Here is to hoping all of your inspirational stories can get me back on the right path
I suggest u need a holiday. Somewhere u can get away and refocus for a few days until u can get string again .. just a suggestion.. hope u feel better soon..!(=2 -
@erikNJ - very sorry you're struggling. Many hugs to you. I cannot do any better than the great thoughts @JulieAL1969 has passed on, but thinking of you. I think we have all gone through these dark, out-of-control periods and it's no fun. You've gotten control of this before and you will do it again.1
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Someone asked how I managed to stay sober for 2 months now, and I thought I’d share my answer here: @ There have been a lot of changes in my body and mind as it is adapting and went through detoxification; it’s truly been a roller coaster. And I wasn’t expecting that to last as long as it has-happy, to sad, to excited, to anxious, to tears, to finding patience and strength I didn’t think I had. Overall it’s absolutely, 100%, worth it. I feel healthier, more energetic, alive.
I get through the hard parts by knowing that the only way out is through. I’ve had to learn to sit with bad feelings until they pass. I’ve had to change my whole life-friends I used to drink with I don’t hang out with anymore, I try to go to bed early and put the focus on the next day, I’m getting more involved in other interests...basically you have to want to change, you have to want it bad, and be willing to do what it takes. I’m pulling out all the stops-I’m on anti craving medication Naltrexone (Revia) which is brilliant. I see a psychotherapist. I go to Alcoholics Anonymous even though it’s not perfect, and I have support there. I take supplements, I journal...I could go on and on8 -
Also I agree with all the comments here, it’s a complicated journey. We need to reach out for support, whether it be this community or individual therapy and groups-but yes sometimes You just have to hibernate for a while in the beginning to get through the initial tough part. And ultimately the relationship we have with ourselves will be our strength or our downfall. I have been such a home body, I went out for the first time in almost 2 months a few days ago. I was terrified, but it went well. I will slowly ease back into social interactions I feel are safe for me. I want to invite anyone on here to friend me and message me any time, even if you’re not sober, or you feel like you failed in some way..I’m here to talk to. It helps me as well. Sending strength and hugs to all of you today!
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JulieAL1969 wrote: »Went to the therapist yesterday just for a mental tune up. What is amazing about seeing a therapist is she never gives your advice or answers. But as you talk , you start to formulate your own solutions to problems. I also told her how proud I am about my AF lifestyle. I said if I was talking to you six months ago, I would have saying how much of a problem I have moderating. Fast forward to today, i was able to tell her about this wonderful thread and how we are all people working together and learning from each other.
If any of you have thought about going to therapy, I recommend it. But you may have to look around for the right one.
My last therapist scared me; she was like my mother. And so I decided to stop going to her, because I was nervous everytime I went.
This new one was a younger lady and she seem non-judgemental and calm.
Bottom line: it's so nice to be able to speak your deepest thoughts to someone impartial. This thread is like that. We dont judge. And I find it so liberating to hear your stories and grow from your experiences.JulieAL1969 wrote: »Went to the therapist yesterday just for a mental tune up. What is amazing about seeing a therapist is she never gives your advice or answers. But as you talk , you start to formulate your own solutions to problems. I also told her how proud I am about my AF lifestyle. I said if I was talking to you six months ago, I would have saying how much of a problem I have moderating. Fast forward to today, i was able to tell her about this wonderful thread and how we are all people working together and learning from each other.
If any of you have thought about going to therapy, I recommend it. But you may have to look around for the right one.
My last therapist scared me; she was like my mother. And so I decided to stop going to her, because I was nervous everytime I went.
This new one was a younger lady and she seem non-judgemental and calm.
Bottom line: it's so nice to be able to speak your deepest thoughts to someone impartial. This thread is like that. We dont judge. And I find it so liberating to hear your stories and grow from your experiences.JulieAL1969 wrote: »Went to the therapist yesterday just for a mental tune up. What is amazing about seeing a therapist is she never gives your advice or answers. But as you talk , you start to formulate your own solutions to problems. I also told her how proud I am about my AF lifestyle. I said if I was talking to you six months ago, I would have saying how much of a problem I have moderating. Fast forward to today, i was able to tell her about this wonderful thread and how we are all people working together and learning from each other.
If any of you have thought about going to therapy, I recommend it. But you may have to look around for the right one.
My last therapist scared me; she was like my mother. And so I decided to stop going to her, because I was nervous everytime I went.
This new one was a younger lady and she seem non-judgemental and calm.
Bottom line: it's so nice to be able to speak your deepest thoughts to someone impartial. This thread is like that. We dont judge. And I find it so liberating to hear your stories and grow from your experiences.
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@JulieAL1969 I can totally relate to this! I actually look forward to seeing my psychotherapist. It’s the best.1
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Hi all! California went well, getting the youngest daughter off to London. She does not drink at all so it was easy to abstain while with her but once we were back in our hotel we did go to the bar for 2 drinks each. Still better than we would have been if she was a drinker. Now on to selling my house and welcoming granddaughter #2 next Tuesday, courtesy of other daughter and son in law. I feel less overwhelmed now. Thank you all for you good wishes from before.6
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@Sophieanna17 - welcome! I think you'll find this group absolutely nonjudgmental and supportive. The first couple of weeks can be tough, so just put one foot in front of the other. Hugs!
Thank you! I feel so welcome, and so far so good! I have learned a great deal just by lurking here, and now am putting these tools into action! I appreciate your kind message.5 -
Thanks friends for all the kind words!
Hope everyone is off to great starts this week!6
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