Less Alcohol- July 2018- One Day at a Time
Replies
-
Listening to Demi Lovato brought up a lot of thoughts and feelings and I wanted to share some perspective on my sobriety.
I started drinking when I was 18 1966 I was in the military and it seemed the two things we always had access to was smoking and drinking. I was stationed in many places and met many people but the constant was we drank I remember sitting down to play cards and the other 3 players produced a 5th and asked me where was my bottle, these guys weren't about to share so I went back to my rack and got a bottle for that night. The fact that we functioned sometimes was unexplainable. By the time I was discharged I was drinking pretty much every day.
Over the years this tainted a lot of my family relationships I seemed to feel if someone wanted to talk ( my parents were both alive back then) I pushed them away anticipating they would be lecturing me on my drinking or my health. I got up every morning worked 5 or 6 days a week so I didn't have a problem, they did. I was married and raised three great kids so on most levels I was a functioning alcoholic. I didn't find out until years later that they all knew that there were topics we just didn't discuss like dads drinking. I lived this way for over 40 years and the good news it didn't kill me but my daughter who is a physician told me if she had been in NY at the time I was getting ready to quit she would have hospitalized me. My mom never got to see me quit drinking she passed over 13 years before I quit, but my dad who lived to 95 did. I was able to open my arms and my heart without the paranoid feeling he was going to be pushing me to quit. I have relationships with my kids and grandkids because we are comfortable with each other and my drinking isn't that "taboo topic" that could set me off. I flew to LA and ran a 10K with my daughter in 2013 and all her friends, most of them are Drs as well and as I finished and they were jumping and screaming and cheering me on the tears were streaming down my face.
My sobriety represents good health physical fitness and good relationships with my family. I had always refused to admit or recognize what I was doing to them. They have all said "no need to apologize so long as we have gotten you back"
So I listen to her song and think about the times I should have said sorry but didn't and what it meant to all of us.
My profile picture was at the finish line of the Santa Monica 10K.15 -
@Key22yB those of us older folks on this thread have discussed our regrets when it comes to our children and families. Trust me, I have not been the best role model either, but it is never too late. I am being the very best Granny I can be now to my darling grand daughters.5
-
Hi all,I used to be an all day/everyday drinker for years,about 7 years ago I became more of a,"binge drinker" going weeks,months with nothing then going whole hog,my goal is to finally put drinking in the past,,I've been sober since July 519
-
@whitpauly congratulations on your decision and your AF days3
-
welcome @whitpauly. That's 20 days straight for you! Fantastic!3
-
Day 31 today.....January felt a lot better and lost a lot more weight back then...this time around not so much....but I feel better13
-
-
-
@Ke22yB I read your story and am so thankful you wrote it. Yes as we age, we may accumulate regrets, but thankfully your family stuck by you.
2 -
@eriknj It is funny how life can be messy. You are comfortable with how much you drink and I am uncomfortable because I stopped so abruptly without much resistance (at least on this leg of my journey). I know I should be happy but I am nagged by the old saying "if something seems to be too good to be true it usually is." My goal was never to accumulate AF days but I seem to be doing it. I think I am closing in on 80.
@NovusDies That hits the target for me. I found it really easy to quit on Jan 31, and have stuck to it ever since.
But ...
In the back of my mind, I have a fear that it's not always going to be easy. One reason why I don't try drinking on a special occasion is because I think I might go straight back to daily drinking.
Maybe it's only "easy" because of the fear. Hmmm.
6 -
Mind you, going back to what @erikNJ has been saying, it's definitely easier for me, because:
a) I don't watch TV, so I don't see advertisements for alcohol (or food); and
b) Our alcohol in Australia can't be sold anywhere except in bottle shops ("liquor stores") or licensed venues, which must be separate to supermarkets. For me, I only have to walk past the bottle shop door once and that's it for me at the supermarket. There's no alcohol inside the supermarket.
But I do have lots of friends on Facebook who post lots of pictures of themselves drinking! Haven't quite got to the point of not being a bit put out by that. Tending towards feeling superior to them though.
7 -
5
-
@eriknj It is funny how life can be messy. You are comfortable with how much you drink and I am uncomfortable because I stopped so abruptly without much resistance (at least on this leg of my journey). I know I should be happy but I am nagged by the old saying "if something seems to be too good to be true it usually is." My goal was never to accumulate AF days but I seem to be doing it. I think I am closing in on 80.
@NovusDies That hits the target for me. I found it really easy to quit on Jan 31, and have stuck to it ever since.
But ...
In the back of my mind, I have a fear that it's not always going to be easy. One reason why I don't try drinking on a special occasion is because I think I might go straight back to daily drinking.
Maybe it's only "easy" because of the fear. Hmmm.
Your comments resonated something within me...Initially when I joined this thread I wasn't THAT confident that I'd go beyond the end of June AF. BUT I needed the month of June to test the waters & & clear my head. Then once I began reading everyone's stuff & watching Craig Beck & Annie Grace and really doing some self examination and a lot of prayer ( I have a spiritual motive for changing my behavior & that is a HUGE part of my lifestyle change, and no worries, I won't go into that end of my life LOL because this is NOT the platform for discussing spirituality, but for ME it was a definite factor).
Anyway, I'm 55 days in & really feeling the benefits of being AF on all levels. NOW, having said all THAT, I have yet to be REALLY tempted...but I'm certain it is coming at some point...I'm just hoping to get enough AF days under my belt & to have developed enough coping strategies that I will be able to resist. At present I avoid situations where I feel vulnerable...and I may always do that but the real test will be the unexpected & unavoidable.
I actually really LOVE being sober & it's interesting that a couple short months ago I NEVER ever would have thought I'd EVER say that!! 55 "one days" and today is one more "one day!!" That's all I need to focus on.
9 -
But I do have lots of friends on Facebook who post lots of pictures of themselves drinking! Haven't quite got to the point of not being a bit put out by that. Tending towards feeling superior to them though.
I read somewhere that, ironically, posting a lot of pictures of alchohol (pretty picturesque drinks, pictures of yourself drinking, etc.) to social media can be a sign of alcoholism. And with the three people I can think of who do that/used to do that, it's true. (One has been sober for five years.)
3 -
I was just looking at the culinary events offered at a local farm. I’ve always wanted to go to one of their events in such lovely surroundings. I found a lot.... There’s apple dinner in October- a five course meal along with thoughtful wine pairings. There’s an event called Cards against Brewmanity. Rose dinner- dedicating a whole dinner to Rose.
Well, you get the point. I started to feel a little left out and I didnt even sign up for any events. Of course, I could go to one of these events and enjoy myself without drinking. But the immature part of my thinking made me feel like a child left out of a birthday party.
Other than that, I’m on my fifth day AF and it feels terrific. I plan on spending the next month, eating healthy, joining an exercise program and doing creative crafts. I also will get back to the work thing and start my new job. I have a lot to look forward to! I will try to stay positive.
@lorrainequiche59 So happy to hear your reflections. Xo
@Cleosweetie Happy to see your message. Always insightful. I have a picture of me onFacebook with all my friends from a few years ago on my birthday. That year, every single friend gave me either a bottle of fancy vodka or wine. Now, that spoke volumes.10 -
JulieAL1969 wrote: »
Other than that, I’m on my fifth day AF and it feels terrific. I plan on spending the next month, eating healthy, joining an exercise program and doing creative crafts. I also will get back to the work thing and start my new job. I have a lot to look forward to! I will try to stay positive.
Wow, 5 days, that passed quickly
Well done you
Keep going girl, you’re doing great6 -
Well day15 for me
I can’t believe it
Day 1, was very hard
Days 11 & 12 were the worst days I can ever recall
Then suddenly it’s day 15 and I’m here, free of alcohol,
I’m soooooooooooooooo pleased14 -
I know I'm late to the thread for the month, but I'm here! I'm on day 4 without a drink, and looking forward to crushing the weekend. My previous m.o. was to drink vodka 4 nights a week, minimum 2 drinks per night...but I work so hard otherwise on my physical And mental health that I decided to say screw that!10
Categories
- All Categories
- 1.4M Health, Wellness and Goals
- 391.3K Introduce Yourself
- 43.4K Getting Started
- 259.7K Health and Weight Loss
- 175.6K Food and Nutrition
- 47.3K Recipes
- 232.3K Fitness and Exercise
- 387 Sleep, Mindfulness and Overall Wellness
- 6.4K Goal: Maintaining Weight
- 8.5K Goal: Gaining Weight and Body Building
- 152.7K Motivation and Support
- 7.8K Challenges
- 1.3K Debate Club
- 96.4K Chit-Chat
- 2.5K Fun and Games
- 3.2K MyFitnessPal Information
- 22 News and Announcements
- 901 Feature Suggestions and Ideas
- 2.2K MyFitnessPal Tech Support Questions