He's/She's Just Not That Into You

1171819202123»

Replies

  • slessofme
    slessofme Posts: 7,737 Member
    Ghosting can hurt, but I truly believe that there are times when it's the right thing to do. It sucks not knowing why, but let's be honest, do we really want everyone telling us our flaws and why they don't want to be in relationship with us? Sometimes I really think it's better not to know.

    I think with a short interaction, it's really easy to end things without ghosting. A reason isn't necessary, but it's courteous to simply say "I don't think we're a good fit after all.".

    If it's a longer interaction then maybe a reason is preferred, but not always required. I was married for 12.5 years. When we seriously discussed ending things it was simply said that we didn't have a viable romantic relationship anymore. I'm trying to be a better person in general, but I don't plan on molding myself into what any specific person wants me to be based on feedback and I wouldn't respect anyone that tried to mold themselves into exactly what I want rather than being the best version of themselves. If we aren't compatible, we aren't - whether we want to be or not.
  • jennifer_417
    jennifer_417 Posts: 12,344 Member
    slessofme wrote: »
    Ghosting can hurt, but I truly believe that there are times when it's the right thing to do. It sucks not knowing why, but let's be honest, do we really want everyone telling us our flaws and why they don't want to be in relationship with us? Sometimes I really think it's better not to know.

    I think with a short interaction, it's really easy to end things without ghosting. A reason isn't necessary, but it's courteous to simply say "I don't think we're a good fit after all.".

    If it's a longer interaction then maybe a reason is preferred, but not always required. I was married for 12.5 years. When we seriously discussed ending things it was simply said that we didn't have a viable romantic relationship anymore. I'm trying to be a better person in general, but I don't plan on molding myself into what any specific person wants me to be based on feedback and I wouldn't respect anyone that tried to mold themselves into exactly what I want rather than being the best version of themselves. If we aren't compatible, we aren't - whether we want to be or not.

    Certainly, most of time, the right thing to do is to be honest. But there are times when it's simply not emotionally (or physically) safe to do so. If I know that a person is just going to lash out, or lacks the ability to understand, or will refuse to understand, then it's not usually helpful to try to hash it out.
  • thegunnut26
    thegunnut26 Posts: 15 Member
    Smoking
  • Chele_Belle_
    Chele_Belle_ Posts: 65 Member
    Spitting/horking in front of me. Gag!

    Bad kisser

    If they can’t show affection through touch, like holding hands etc. It doesn’t have to be a smooch fest in public but a little subtle contact is important to me.



  • denny_mac wrote: »
    If she won't EVER let there be silence. Even if it's awkward. Sometimes I need silence.

    Especially when they won't let you get a word in edgewise, nothing more obnoxious than trying to have a conversation with someone who is only interested in hearing the sound of their own voice.... I'd put this in the deal breakers thread.
  • tinak33
    tinak33 Posts: 9,883 Member
    denny_mac wrote: »
    If she won't EVER let there be silence. Even if it's awkward. Sometimes I need silence.

    Especially when they won't let you get a word in edgewise, nothing more obnoxious than trying to have a conversation with someone who is only interested in hearing the sound of their own voice.... I'd put this in the deal breakers thread.

    Same.
    Or even if you do talk, they don't acknowledge a word you said and completely change the subject. Or interrupt you to change the subject because they have something else on their mind they want to talk about. Nope.
  • RhiAnLewis17
    RhiAnLewis17 Posts: 2,299 Member
    SwannySez wrote: »
    Not breathing.
    No heartbeat.
    Advanced levels of decomposition.

    This is fantastic.
  • Keep_on_cardio
    Keep_on_cardio Posts: 4,166 Member
    Gloating

    Arrogant

    Dry sense of humor

    Bad hygiene

  • Mr_Healthy_Habits
    Mr_Healthy_Habits Posts: 12,588 Member
    Thou shalt have no other DC's before Meee
  • Its_Haleeyyy
    Its_Haleeyyy Posts: 39 Member
    No job
    No license
    Doesn't respect his family or others
    Clingy/Controlling in any way, shape, or form
    Smoking weed
    Mama's boy (To an excessive level)
    Won't go out with me ever
    Won't introduce me to friends/family and won't meet mine