I am happy to report that last week's hiccup did not toss me into a downward spiral. I have not had a repeat or even the desire to drink. I realize now how much I love the self control I have sober. I love remembering conversations. I love not waking up with a hangover....
I love the support of this group. I know I'm not a daily poster or even daily reader, but it helps knowing that yall are here and we are struggling thru this together. Struggling in our own, different ways.
I am happy to report that last week's hiccup did not toss me into a downward spiral. I have not had a repeat or even the desire to drink. I realize now how much I love the self control I have sober. I love remembering conversations. I love not waking up with a hangover....
I love the support of this group. I know I'm not a daily poster or even daily reader, but it helps knowing that yall are here and we are struggling thru this together. Struggling in our own, different ways.
I love you all!!!!
You have done absolutely amazing. You did a whole year SOBER !
Seven months sober today! I was reading some comments on Quora. I see that around this time, the brain is still trying to get back to the normal -before drinking altered the brain chemistry.
Makes sense to me. 30 years of drinking alcohol (not always to excess) has rewired my brain.
Also, I am finding that being sober means having to face reasons you drank in the first place. I'm working on myself- trying to stay positive and find happiness in small life events.
@RubyRed427
7 months is amazing ! Massive well done.
I am also working on myself as I do not want to have another recurrence. I am genuinely happier when I am 100% AF. I am determined to protect my sobriety.
I agree. I feel so much happier when I'm sober. I wake up happy to be sober and can't wait to plan my day and it doesn't involve alcohol. That obsessions is fading....
The best part is I've had no hangovers!! hooray! No vomiting, wasted days and hours on the couch, no self loathing, no sneaking and lying to myself about how much I drank, no wasted money on alcohol, so many benefits.
Only another 104 days until I am back at my personal best. Can't wait.
Tattoo parlours are open on 26th April in Scotland, so I will be phoning to book an appointment then.....my tattoo will represent my 100 days AF that I managed on prior streak and also be for my parents so it will be really special for me. Really special. ❤🦋🌹💯
Only another 104 days until I am back at my personal best. Can't wait.
Tattoo parlours are open on 26th April in Scotland, so I will be phoning to book an appointment then.....my tattoo will represent my 100 days AF that I managed on prior streak and also be for my parents so it will be really special for me. Really special. ❤🦋🌹💯
That is beautiful. I can't wait to see your tattoo if you want to share it with us. I love the double meaning. Congrats on day 30!!
Wow. I didn't realize until I logged in how long it's been since I read and posted. I've caught up with the reading. A belated kiss and hug to you, Ruby for the tragedy in your family. I was so sorry to read about that. Congratulations on your sober vacation. Jen, that was amazing to learn about your father! How well I remember his brave actions that day! @Up_n_Running, you are doing great! The "boys" are going to have to learn to respect your boundaries. Hopefully they will get there. You at least deserve your sleep!
I'm not doing very well on the drinking front. I just can't believe I was 6 months AF and then am still struggling after relapsing (or whatever term @RubyRed427 mentioned was better) on January 6. I've had 10-day AF streaks since then, but then bam! I've never experienced, ever, the kind of blackout drinking described by some, but my drinking was (and is at the moment) slow and steady and bad for me. I've never even had a deadly hangover, but I know I kind of live in a hungover state when I'm drinking--functional but feeling crappy. One issue is my terrible tinnitus. It seems alcohol is the only thing that calms it down. Another weird thing is that I never drink while out. On Easter, I joined my husband and mom and sister and friend for my very first restaurant outing since COVID started. It was a lovely Easter brunch, complete with mimosas. But I stuck to water. But THEN, when I got home, I drank. It's not because I'm "hiding" my drinking. I truly am not motivated to drink when I'm socializing. I know that's the opposite of many people's experience.
Anyway, yadda yadda yadda. I'm boring myself and I'm sure you guys. I really want my sobriety back. I believe I will get it back. But one thing I now know for SURE is that "just one" is deadly for me. I read Quit Like a Woman when I was not drinking and really liked it, along with a few other good, inspiring books. I guess I'll go back to those and also try to stay faithful to this group because it has been so helpful.
36 days AF! I had my 30 day 'birthday' at my local meeting been kind of down lately though. I have been gardening and prepping my backyard/beds. I started some seeds, lettuce, lemon cucumber, watermelon, microgreens. My friends who have greenhouses will be giving me their heirloom tomato and other starts when they're ready. Gardening is my therapy. For years my exhusband wouldn't 'let/allow' me to garden and when I was drinking I would plant but it was a mess, would end up forgetting where I planted bulbs, would end up bailing on the project because I was so effed up, etc. I was able to sit in my garden last night (I worked in it until after dark) and just sat and took everything in. I thought how I am actually grateful for being AF. My exhusband is still being horrible, we had mediation last week and he went on a rant to the mediator about how I'm doing nothing to better myself, refuses to let kids come back home or anymore time for that matter. Also found out from my daughter he told my babies to start calling his new girlfriend "mom". COMPLETELY pissed me off and devastated me. I would have ordinarily went and got a bottle of the hard stuff but I am getting more tools in my toolbox to cope with better ways. I am hella proud of everyone on here, for taking the right steps to be healthy and taking care of themselves
@mtngrl3, Congratulations on 36 days! The gardening sounds like wonderful therapy. We had a community plot several years ago and it was really amazing to see things "magically" appear. We don't garden any more, but just yesterday we received our first CSA share, and prepping and figuring out what to do with the produce is therapeutic for me! Plus, I so admire our farmers who have bounced back after our epic Texas freeze. Last night I sauteed beet greens and they were delicious. Today I'm roasting the beets. Fresh produce makes me happy, and I'm sure growing it is a wonderful distraction from any temptation.
Bummer about your ex. That would be a real trigger, but you are coping beautifully. Brava!
P.S. to my 2 a.m. post above: I was up until 4:30 because of tinnitus. I did some research. Although alcohol kind of deadens the sensation of buzzing, it is actually a contributing factor to the symptom. As is salt. As is sugar. As is aspartame (I usually drink one Diet Coke a day). So now I have an extra motivation to quit the alcohol. It's "helpfulness" is just one more of its lies.
I took half a day off and got permission to work the other half from home, so I'm reflecting on my diet and my drinking, prepping veggies, and feeling optimistic.
@donimfp It will all work itself out. You had a long run AF for six months; you can use those tools you used before, once again.
I don't believe willpower works, so you may need to reread (like you said) books, focus on sobriety, meditate, etc.
I believe in you!!
Thanks for sharing; every time someone shares their experiences, it helps me sooo much.
I have a little voice that sometimes whispers, "sure you can go back to drinking and be normal." I can see for many of us, it's so hard to be a moderate drinker.
@mtngrl3 Sounds like your ex husband needs some parenting lessons- sorry to be blunt. He should be more respectful of you in regards to his girlfriend (having your kids call her mom). That is too confusing for children.
He should also be big enough to acknowledge your efforts!!! I'm so proud of you!!
I have failed, I keep trying not each day slip back, I do realise something is going to give sooner or later but not sure how to get out of the spiralling circle!
I can relate to so much Rubyred427 listed previously, I guess I need to try again and be more positive!
@donimfp you are NEVER boring ! I love to hear how your getting on. You can & will get back on track to where you want to be. As for 'the boys' maybe you can see now why I have gave them that nickname lol they are like a couple of teenagers once they crack the drink open....to be honest, after their last KILLER hangover, they are sworn off booze. We shall see. I'm definitely not being kept up all night, ever again! 😊
@mtngrl3 happy for you that you have been able to get back into your gardening. 😊 having that sober tool box is what it's all about since we are chosing not to use our old crutch, alcohol. Huge kudos to you for dipping into your tool kit and dealing with your ex in the way you did. Ultimately you and your kids will benefit from that. 💖
Replies
No, I find advice given here very useful!
You are a friend on here that's for sure! I really appreciate having your support 😊💖
I am happy to report that last week's hiccup did not toss me into a downward spiral. I have not had a repeat or even the desire to drink. I realize now how much I love the self control I have sober. I love remembering conversations. I love not waking up with a hangover....
I love the support of this group. I know I'm not a daily poster or even daily reader, but it helps knowing that yall are here and we are struggling thru this together. Struggling in our own, different ways.
I love you all!!!!
You have done absolutely amazing. You did a whole year SOBER !
You are an inspiration for me, for sure.
💖🤗
Remember my sister always says if you're 99 percent sober, then that is awesome!
Sometimes there is too much pressure for 100 percent perfection.
I like that!!! 99% sober is officially my new thing!!!!
Makes sense to me. 30 years of drinking alcohol (not always to excess) has rewired my brain.
Also, I am finding that being sober means having to face reasons you drank in the first place. I'm working on myself- trying to stay positive and find happiness in small life events.
7 months is amazing ! Massive well done.
I am also working on myself as I do not want to have another recurrence. I am genuinely happier when I am 100% AF. I am determined to protect my sobriety.
I agree. I feel so much happier when I'm sober. I wake up happy to be sober and can't wait to plan my day and it doesn't involve alcohol. That obsessions is fading....
The best part is I've had no hangovers!! hooray! No vomiting, wasted days and hours on the couch, no self loathing, no sneaking and lying to myself about how much I drank, no wasted money on alcohol, so many benefits.
Have a great day!
Only another 104 days until I am back at my personal best. Can't wait.
Tattoo parlours are open on 26th April in Scotland, so I will be phoning to book an appointment then.....my tattoo will represent my 100 days AF that I managed on prior streak and also be for my parents so it will be really special for me. Really special. ❤🦋🌹💯
That is beautiful. I can't wait to see your tattoo if you want to share it with us. I love the double meaning. Congrats on day 30!!
I'm not doing very well on the drinking front. I just can't believe I was 6 months AF and then am still struggling after relapsing (or whatever term @RubyRed427 mentioned was better) on January 6. I've had 10-day AF streaks since then, but then bam! I've never experienced, ever, the kind of blackout drinking described by some, but my drinking was (and is at the moment) slow and steady and bad for me. I've never even had a deadly hangover, but I know I kind of live in a hungover state when I'm drinking--functional but feeling crappy. One issue is my terrible tinnitus. It seems alcohol is the only thing that calms it down. Another weird thing is that I never drink while out. On Easter, I joined my husband and mom and sister and friend for my very first restaurant outing since COVID started. It was a lovely Easter brunch, complete with mimosas. But I stuck to water. But THEN, when I got home, I drank. It's not because I'm "hiding" my drinking. I truly am not motivated to drink when I'm socializing. I know that's the opposite of many people's experience.
Anyway, yadda yadda yadda. I'm boring myself and I'm sure you guys. I really want my sobriety back. I believe I will get it back. But one thing I now know for SURE is that "just one" is deadly for me. I read Quit Like a Woman when I was not drinking and really liked it, along with a few other good, inspiring books. I guess I'll go back to those and also try to stay faithful to this group because it has been so helpful.
Bummer about your ex. That would be a real trigger, but you are coping beautifully. Brava!
I took half a day off and got permission to work the other half from home, so I'm reflecting on my diet and my drinking, prepping veggies, and feeling optimistic.
I don't believe willpower works, so you may need to reread (like you said) books, focus on sobriety, meditate, etc.
I believe in you!!
Thanks for sharing; every time someone shares their experiences, it helps me sooo much.
I have a little voice that sometimes whispers, "sure you can go back to drinking and be normal." I can see for many of us, it's so hard to be a moderate drinker.
@mtngrl3 Sounds like your ex husband needs some parenting lessons- sorry to be blunt. He should be more respectful of you in regards to his girlfriend (having your kids call her mom). That is too confusing for children.
He should also be big enough to acknowledge your efforts!!! I'm so proud of you!!
Of course, when I read it, I thought 'wow maybe I can be California sober???".
Nope, won't work for me unfortunately.
Here's an article about it. It's about Demi Lovato and experts in alcohol use disorder.
https://www.usatoday.com/story/life/health-wellness/2021/04/06/demi-lovato-dancing-devil-explores-california-sober-concept/7089763002/
I find this so unfortunate and sad. Another great reason to stay sober.
I can relate to so much Rubyred427 listed previously, I guess I need to try again and be more positive!