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"Be Kind to Yourself" Success stories...what does it mean and how do you do it regularly? Pls. share

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  • NewLIFEstyle4MENewLIFEstyle4ME Posts: 3,577Member Member Posts: 3,577Member Member
    Being kind to yourself”, for me would be placing my mental health and inner needs above people pleasing and people chasing.

    Having an understanding and a plan intact, when placing myself into hard environments (family gatherings). Being kind to myself, is saying no. To not place myself around people who dimiss and invalidate who I am or why I am how I am. Being kind, would be not panicking over a day of bad eating choices or a missed workout. Being kind, is making that commitment of placing my mind at highest priority, dropping those who bring confusion.

    Wow...just W <3 W!!!! What you have written here is so VERY important to change, lifestyle change and invites so much hope, strength and power. You my dear ROCK, period. Cheering you on and thank you so much for contributing to this thread. YAY YOU!!!
  • NewLIFEstyle4MENewLIFEstyle4ME Posts: 3,577Member Member Posts: 3,577Member Member
    Another way of being kind to yourself is making being "clean and cute" a priority. When I was obese/overweight, these things were not only NOT a priority to me, but I "talked myself and bought" the idea that wearing ill-fitting and oversized clothes and sweats and quite frankly ugly stuff was okay, because who cares! Doing things for your body (besides eating and drinking stuff as some kind of "reward" or "treat") instead, taking long hot baths filled with all kinds a good smelling oils/bath bombs/scented epsom bath salts and skin softening stuff (instead of taking showers--taking baths more often, no matter how much you've convinced yourself you don't like to take baths--preferring showers), just making it a "spa-like" experience using facial scrubs and masques/skincare on the regular is such a terrific way to treat yourself more kind. Making sure your environment is clean and pretty on the regular makes being kind to oneself so "rewarding" and good.
  • NewLIFEstyle4MENewLIFEstyle4ME Posts: 3,577Member Member Posts: 3,577Member Member
    msf74 wrote: »
    It means accepting that I'm human and human beings make mistakes and let themselves down all the time - but that's ok.

    This sounds so simple...but for so so SO many people, it's mega not. It's taken me YEARS to get this thru my head and in my heart. I'm THRILLED that you "get this" YAY YOU and thanks so much for sharing!
  • NewLIFEstyle4MENewLIFEstyle4ME Posts: 3,577Member Member Posts: 3,577Member Member
    It's taking on a new meaning for me lately...

    I'm learning that I have to take care of myself. I've been a mother since 18 years old and now a grandmother and I always think in terms of taking care of everyone else first. I'm learning that being kind to myself means taking care of my body/mind. The way I think of myself, dress myself, feed and exersise it and how I treat others (important to me).

    Within the confines of taking care of myself by "being kind to myself" it means not over complicating things, not stressing about how many calories something has, not freaking out going over occasionally, not worrying about the scale and how often or how much it goes down or up. It also means continuing to have an open mind and listening to other folks who are successful on the same weight & strengh training path I'm trying to stay on:).

    It means focusing on making a habit out of logging food and exercising and enjoying my second half of life.

    How utterly tremendous--YAY YOU and thank you ever so much for posting...BOOM!
  • NewLIFEstyle4MENewLIFEstyle4ME Posts: 3,577Member Member Posts: 3,577Member Member
    lalabank wrote: »
    I’m adding in to all of these wonderful statements, setting realistic goals is a huge kindness I’ve learned to do for myself. Yes we’d all love to lose twenty lbs this month or fifty by Valentine’s Day but realistically my body’s speed is more like 5lbs a month or 15 in three.
    When I’m realistic with my goals I don’t get into that self hating cycle of constantly failing to reach unattainable goals. Lol my realistic goal for December is 2lbs and to get in all my workouts. I can do that!

    Love this..."being realistic with our goals" AND not allowing our "expectations" rule and reign over us too.

  • littlegreenparrot1littlegreenparrot1 Posts: 70Member Member Posts: 70Member Member
    I try to treat myself in the same way I would treat a small child.

    I require a nutritious variety of food, that includes chocolate and cake. I need fresh air, exercise, regular sleep and play.
    I also need the understanding that sometimes what I want isn't what I need, but that I'll do it anyway!

    I also don't fail, I am always learning. Anything that doesn't work is in some way a learning experience, so you adapt and move on. No point stressing over what is past.
  • EvamuttEvamutt Posts: 1,483Member Member Posts: 1,483Member Member
    for me, there are several ways, first when I get random negative thoughts about myself(for no apparent reason) like
    you're no good", I counter act them with what God says, like I'm loved(I'm a believer) or get depressing thoughts, I work on renewing my mind. when I do something selfish, or just plain wrong, I do ask for forgiveness & apologize, on a practical level, I was a mom with 4 kids & now a grandma so I'm used to putting myself last, but I have learned to be kind to myself by, saying "no" when I'm tired or just need time to myself. Not wearing myself out by doing too much in one day or even not going out with a friend when i don't feel up to it. not doing things I really don't want to do just to please someone else. I've learned to value myself more & not put myself down & realize that being human, I'm never going to be perfect
  • NewLIFEstyle4MENewLIFEstyle4ME Posts: 3,577Member Member Posts: 3,577Member Member
    Evamutt wrote: »
    for me, there are several ways, first when I get random negative thoughts about myself(for no apparent reason) like you're no good", I counter act them with what God says, like I'm loved(I'm a believer) or get depressing thoughts, I work on renewing my mind. when I do something selfish, or just plain wrong, I do ask for forgiveness & apologize, on a practical level, I was a mom with 4 kids & now a grandma so I'm used to putting myself last, but I have learned to be kind to myself by, saying "no" when I'm tired or just need time to myself. Not wearing myself out by doing too much in one day or even not going out with a friend when i don't feel up to it. not doing things I really don't want to do just to please someone else. I've learned to value myself more & not put myself down & realize that being human, I'm never going to be perfect

    {{{{{{{{{{ <3 EVAMUTT <3 }}}}}}}}}}}}}} Thank you beloved, ever so VERY much for posting this...it means more to me, what you've shared here, than you will ever know (and to a LOT of others that may not post/reply here too). I would highlight/bold some of the important things you've shared, but I'd wind up highlighting/bolding everything you've said b/c everything you've said means so VERY much to me. Thank you once more sister girl for contributing so VERY much to this thread--WOW!
  • NewLIFEstyle4MENewLIFEstyle4ME Posts: 3,577Member Member Posts: 3,577Member Member
    I try to treat myself in the same way I would treat a small child.

    I require a nutritious variety of food, that includes chocolate and cake. I need fresh air, exercise, regular sleep and play.
    I also need the understanding that sometimes what I want isn't what I need, but that I'll do it anyway!

    I also don't fail, I am always learning. Anything that doesn't work is in some way a learning experience, so you adapt and move on. No point stressing over what is past.

    This is just so excellent and doable littlegreenparrot--so very inspirational. Thank you ever so much for contributing to this thread! <3 o:) <3
  • NewLIFEstyle4MENewLIFEstyle4ME Posts: 3,577Member Member Posts: 3,577Member Member
    Forsaking anger and wrath, period. I know it's HARD to do, but not impossible. Just MAKE yourself "get-it" that we simply can not change people, only ourselves and that in itself is a HUGE mountain to conquer, let alone climb. Anger and wrath simply does not work when "trying" to get people to do stuff or even understand us. It is being so KIND to y/ourselves replacing anger and wrath with patience and kindness...no matter how impossible it may seem to do/be. IF we do CHOOSE to be kind(er) to ourselves and "catch" ourselves (when not if) we're being wrathful about stuff, the more we practice this the more "self-control", stress free(er) and power over ourselves and the situation will be. Here's some stuff that may help:


    demotivation.us_Speak-when-you-are-angry-And-you-will-make-the-best-speech-you-will-ever-regret_141085455844.jpg



    22-6aug15-channelise-your-anger.jpg



    anger-quotes-17.jpg



    Anger-Quotes-002.jpg



    confucius1.jpg
    edited January 15
  • Copper_BoomCopper_Boom Posts: 73Member Member Posts: 73Member Member
    Forsaking anger and wrath, period. I know it's HARD to do, but not impossible. Just MAKE yourself "get-it" that we simply can not change people, only ourselves and that in itself is a HUGE mountain to conquer, let alone climb.

    Love this sentiment! Another quote I’ve found helpful is “Holding on to anger is like drinking poison and expecting the other person to die.”
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