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Fair to Request “No Junk Food” at HOME?

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  • LolinloggenLolinloggen Posts: 279Member Member Posts: 279Member Member
    I think it is fair, We try to avoid to have nuts in the house and a specific brand of penut butter My husband has een how I can't abstain from them. So we don't have them or only if we have agreement before hand that we need it
  • vanityy99vanityy99 Posts: 745Member Member Posts: 745Member Member
    vanityy99 wrote: »
    I don't think it's fair to ask at all. I don't know about a relationship type situation but I live with 3 roommates and a request to not keep a certain food in the house would be met with a resounding " or you could keep your hands off my *kitten* pizza".

    I'm an adult. What I do or don't shove in my face is my choice, it being in the house isn't to blame.

    I'm trying to cut back on drinking...doesn't mean I told my roommate to not keep beer in the fridge because that's not his problem.

    as mentioned upthread, housemates is a different scenario to people in a relationship.

    Usually in a relationship you are more invested in the other person and more willing to make compromises for them - and their problem is, in a way, your problem too.



    It's still one adult asking another adult to go out of their way for something that person shouldn't have to. If someone offers me food, is it thier fault if I eat it, or mine?

    Well, in my long relationship experience, adults often ask each other to go out of their way for each other even though they shouldnt have to.

    I gave examples upthread - I walk to work, it isnt my husbands fault it then starts raining,maybe it is mine I didnt read the weather forecast, he shouldnt have to pick me up - but if i ring and ask him, he does.

    He is going out somewhere, it isnt my fault he hates ironing, I shouldnt have to do it for him - but I dont mind ironing and he does other things for me so I do.

    You know, compromise and negotiation and goodwill

    I’m a different breed then. if my man told me he doesn’t want to iron because he hates ironing I’d tell him to suck it up.

    He’s not handicapped.



    Things like that make me cringe. The raining example is kind of understanding.

    My husband is not handicapped either - but he has preferences and things he likes and hates doing and I have things I like and hate doing and each have things we dont like but don't really mind doing.

    so we can compromise/negotiate/ assist each other

    as long as it works both ways, not sure why that is a problem or cringe worthy.

    (ironing was just a random example that applies to us - other couples will have other examples)

    Assisting each other and compromise is fine to a certain extent as long as it’s reasonable. Like, I don’t mind rubbing cream on his back because he cannot reach. But I’m not ironing his clothes because he simply hates it, I don’t exactly find it amusing either he can get over it and do it himself. And I’m not hiding food because he has no self control, he’s grown. If he had a bad relationship with food, then I wouldn’t mind hiding food if he asked.

    Some things I can compromise with other things he can fend for himself. I don’t coddle grown people and I don’t enjoy being asked for petty favours.



    edited September 29
  • Niki_FitzNiki_Fitz Posts: 932Member, Premium Member Posts: 932Member, Premium Member
    If your hubs thinks it’s fair and he’s not upset at your request, you’re very lucky! Take advantage of this extra support. I never had that help, and we had some good arguments in the beginning, when I first started tackling my binge eating and night eating. But I’m the only one responsible for what I put in my body. You can totally succeed with the stuff around. It may be a slower road but two years into this, learning to say no to snacks and deserts, and then learning to moderate them, has probably been the best for long-term success. (Fingers crossed!).
  • paperpuddingpaperpudding Posts: 5,118Member Member Posts: 5,118Member Member
    vanityy99 wrote: »
    vanityy99 wrote: »
    I don't think it's fair to ask at all. I don't know about a relationship type situation but I live with 3 roommates and a request to not keep a certain food in the house would be met with a resounding " or you could keep your hands off my *kitten* pizza".

    I'm an adult. What I do or don't shove in my face is my choice, it being in the house isn't to blame.

    I'm trying to cut back on drinking...doesn't mean I told my roommate to not keep beer in the fridge because that's not his problem.

    as mentioned upthread, housemates is a different scenario to people in a relationship.

    Usually in a relationship you are more invested in the other person and more willing to make compromises for them - and their problem is, in a way, your problem too.



    It's still one adult asking another adult to go out of their way for something that person shouldn't have to. If someone offers me food, is it thier fault if I eat it, or mine?

    Well, in my long relationship experience, adults often ask each other to go out of their way for each other even though they shouldnt have to.

    I gave examples upthread - I walk to work, it isnt my husbands fault it then starts raining,maybe it is mine I didnt read the weather forecast, he shouldnt have to pick me up - but if i ring and ask him, he does.

    He is going out somewhere, it isnt my fault he hates ironing, I shouldnt have to do it for him - but I dont mind ironing and he does other things for me so I do.

    You know, compromise and negotiation and goodwill

    I’m a different breed then. if my man told me he doesn’t want to iron because he hates ironing I’d tell him to suck it up.

    He’s not handicapped.



    Things like that make me cringe. The raining example is kind of understanding.

    My husband is not handicapped either - but he has preferences and things he likes and hates doing and I have things I like and hate doing and each have things we dont like but don't really mind doing.

    so we can compromise/negotiate/ assist each other

    as long as it works both ways, not sure why that is a problem or cringe worthy.

    (ironing was just a random example that applies to us - other couples will have other examples)

    Assisting each other and compromise is fine to a certain extent as long as it’s reasonable. Like, I don’t mind rubbing cream on his back because he cannot reach. But I’m not ironing his clothes because he simply hates it, I don’t exactly find it amusing either he can get over it and do it himself. And I’m not hiding food because he has no self control, he’s grown. If he had a bad relationship with food, then I wouldn’t mind hiding food if he asked.

    Some things I can compromise with other things he can fend for himself. I don’t coddle grown people and I don’t enjoy being asked for petty favours.




    Ah, well, my husband and I do each other petty favours all the time and coddle each other as grown adults.

    Your definition of reasonable may be different but we've been married for over 30 years so this works for us.

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