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Unwanted advice at gym

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  • Carlos_421Carlos_421 Posts: 4,998Member Member Posts: 4,998Member Member
    Cherimoose wrote: »
    Dolly989 wrote: »
    When I walked past he asked could he make a phone call on my phone because his went dead and he needed to call his sister. I stupidly gave him my phone.

    Block the number. He may have called his phone, to get your number. :+1:

    Exactly what I was gonna say.
  • vanityy99vanityy99 Posts: 891Member Member Posts: 891Member Member
    Next time don’t lend strangers your phone, they can be some drug addict, dealer, criminal- you don’t want anything tied to you. I was just being nice once and let some random dude use my phone, and this security guard came up to me and gave me that same advice that stuck with me forever, no more nice girl since. There’s some crazies out there.

    edited October 17
  • Gisel2015Gisel2015 Posts: 2,907Member Member Posts: 2,907Member Member
    One time this girl with a rat face and the body of a praying mantis told me I was going to “hurt myself” doing tricep dips off of a bench. I laughed and said mind ya business. There’s a reason that even at my most out of shape, I am more built than you :D

    Discussing way to judge and refer to another person.
  • NovusDiesNovusDies Posts: 5,995Member, Premium Member Posts: 5,995Member, Premium Member
    Dolly989 wrote: »
    AnnPT77 wrote: »
    Dolly989 wrote: »
    Hey guys so just an update incase anybody is interested. I've seen this guy a couple of times since and he always chooses the workout station facing me. It makes me uncomfortable but i just try to avoid eye contact and get on with it. Today when I finished training and was about to leave i saw him hang around at the entrance he was leaving to. I saw him standing there and didnt want to bump into him so i tried to mess with my phone for a bit and put my coat on to give him a chance to leave but he was still standing there and i had to leave for work so i decided to just go. When I walked past he asked could he make a phone call on my phone because his went dead and he needed to call his sister. I stupidly gave him my phone. I know that wasnt the smartest move but I just felt so akward and put on the spot. Then he started asking how was training and asking me my name.

    This may all turn out just to be a guy who's a little too aggressive, yet harmless . . . but:

    Some people with predatory intent test potential targets by pushing them to do things that make that person just a little uncomfortable. If the target complies "to be nice" or "because they didn't know what to do", then the predator knows they have someone they can manipulate.

    You do not want to be that person.

    Especially if a situation like that makes you feel awkward or uncomfortable, I'd encourage you not to cooperate or be nice. Walk away. You don't have to be super-rude or anything. Just tell him you're in a rush, don't have time, if he tries something like the "use your phone" gambit. If he acts inclined to follow you, go back into the gym, talk to a manager or trainer in a separate private area if possible, and have them escort you to your car (maybe ask them to pretend you're getting something from the car to give or show them, if you're worried about escalating). If you sense that he's going to be pushy, move to make sure you're standing where the gym personnel can overhear the whole conversation.

    It's OK to be brusque or "not nice" or to not have time to interact with someone who is making you uncomfortable. It's OK to assert yourself. Please be careful.


    Yeah I guess I have to work on being more assertive. If I could go back I wouldve told him I don't have time but it was just one of those moments where I was caught off guard. My phone was in my hand and I couldn't think of an excuse. I know I don't owe him anything. In the gym he always seems to be where I am. If im at the weights so is he, if im doing cardio so is he.... I havent reported it to anyone because it could be a coincidence and I'd hate to excuse somebody in the wrong. I'll keep an eye on it an observe the situation.

    In other posts you have discussed your fiancé, is there any way you could get him to go with you to the gym once or twice? At this point, this guy would be making me nervous, and having someone there with you might be the easiest way to convince him you aren’t available. Not to mention, you were hoping to get your fiancé into a more healthful lifestyle so it would kill two birds with one stone.

    If you can’t swing that, I agree that having gym staff walk you to your car when he’s loitering outside sounds like a good plan.


    A conspicuously loud lovey-dovey conversation with the fiancé via phone might also work too.
  • timetolosethatweighttimetolosethatweight Posts: 15Member Member Posts: 15Member Member
    If that's you in your profile pic, he was hitting on you. Not very effectively, obviously.

    This pretty much sums up the situation.
  • JB1775JB1775 Posts: 134Member, Premium Member Posts: 134Member, Premium Member
    psychod787 wrote: »
    You know, this thread has just strengthened my resolve to be a sociable person. Not every man who talks to a lady wants to kill, skin, and wear her head as a hat. Conversely, not every woman who speaks to a man wants to sleep with him or is after something. Might make me a pariah, but kitten it...

    This is one of the more refreshing comments I've read. Cheers!
  • steveko89steveko89 Posts: 1,439Member Member Posts: 1,439Member Member
    PTA4LYF wrote: »
    ok heres the deal. ive been a physical therapist for 28 years every time i go to the gym i see at least 6 people using improper form for exercise, cardio or weight lifting some to the point that they can hurt their back or injure muscles. i want to approach them and help them because id hate to see them get hurt but i dont because as very well mentioned here in all the posts people will get offended. so my resolve is i say to myself ok i guess i will see them in a month in my clinic when they are recovering from some musculoskeletal injury.

    Is it not better for business that way?
  • aokoyeaokoye Posts: 3,255Member Member Posts: 3,255Member Member
    steveko89 wrote: »
    PTA4LYF wrote: »
    ok heres the deal. ive been a physical therapist for 28 years every time i go to the gym i see at least 6 people using improper form for exercise, cardio or weight lifting some to the point that they can hurt their back or injure muscles. i want to approach them and help them because id hate to see them get hurt but i dont because as very well mentioned here in all the posts people will get offended. so my resolve is i say to myself ok i guess i will see them in a month in my clinic when they are recovering from some musculoskeletal injury.

    Is it not better for business that way?

    Sure it may be, but I don't think most medical professionals are continuously hoping that people hurt themselves or end up with XYZ illness/disorder.
  • PTA4LYFPTA4LYF Posts: 60Member Member Posts: 60Member Member
    steveko89 wrote: »
    PTA4LYF wrote: »
    ok heres the deal. ive been a physical therapist for 28 years every time i go to the gym i see at least 6 people using improper form for exercise, cardio or weight lifting some to the point that they can hurt their back or injure muscles. i want to approach them and help them because id hate to see them get hurt but i dont because as very well mentioned here in all the posts people will get offended. so my resolve is i say to myself ok i guess i will see them in a month in my clinic when they are recovering from some musculoskeletal injury.

    Is it not better for business that way?

    im not saying i want them to get injured i want to prevent that from happening that is why i want so badly to advise people of the risks. but everyone on this thread is saying to leave them alone and not approach them which it makes it hard for me since im in the business of helping people.
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