Tell me if this is creepy, or if I am just overreacting....

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Replies

  • BAMA66
    BAMA66 Posts: 240
    Creepy for sure
  • rml_16
    rml_16 Posts: 16,414 Member
    So sorry they're doing this to her. I wish this were an easier situation.
  • Johnnyswife
    Johnnyswife Posts: 1,447 Member
    They are punishing her for this though. I can't even begin to explain how upset I am at this. I have to get her out of that house.
    Do me a favor, before they make her unfriend you and before they make her remove all his posts off her Facebook page. Hightlight and copy and paste everything you can or take screen shots of every comment he's made as proof..At any point in the future if you do try to get custody of her, you'll have proof of this creeper's actions.

    I'm not sure why it would be impossible to have her at your home more if not all the time, especially if you can prove her mom isn't taking care of her. she sounds like she puts her husband first over her daughter. Punishing her for speaking out over something that makes her feel unsafe makes me sick!
    It really makes me apperciate my husbands ex so much more. She mostly sounds like your ex's twin, except if my step daughter said something about one of her boyfriend's making her feel unsafe, she would kick them to the curb as soon as possible. She is a REALLY good mom!! Your ex, not so much...Sorry your daughter has to deal with this. :(
  • 3ball
    3ball Posts: 338
    I finally heard from her. Her school pictures are tomorrow so she was allowed to call to ask what I wanted for those. I asked her how she was doing, but her mom was right next to her so I just told her we could talk or text later and she said yeah.

    Good idea on getting screen shots. Thanks.
  • countrydarling1
    countrydarling1 Posts: 386 Member
    I'd say if your gut feels its creepy. its creepy. I dont have any teens yet, but believe me i would & will be all up in there business, knowing pw & things to their fb, but not fb stocking them!
  • countrydarling1
    countrydarling1 Posts: 386 Member
    What state are yall in? In Texas if the child is 12 or over & both houses are suitable for parenting. then the child gets to choose where she lives.
  • PegasusDeb
    PegasusDeb Posts: 665 Member
    If she don't like him commenting, he can be "unfriended". It sounds creepy, but maybe he's just trying to be "cool" . If he acts weird other then that, then I'd be concerned & talk to you daughter. I have removed "friends" cuz they got too weirded out.
  • NiciS72
    NiciS72 Posts: 1,043 Member
    Do you pay for her phone? I believe if you do the law is on your side. My little step sister in law had this happen to her and her narcissistic father got in BIG trouble with the cops because he took it away. I highly suggest speaking to a lawyer and coming prepared with specifics.

    FYI my SSIL is 15 and no longer has to visit the narcissistic B*****d per the judge and court appointed therapist.
  • Eric0388
    Eric0388 Posts: 20
    Creep! Enough said! Trust me. I've seen the unfortunate results at work first hand.
  • KendalBeee
    KendalBeee Posts: 2,269 Member
    Bad mouthing you is one thing (she's old enough to recognize it for what it is), unfriending both step parents on fb to "remove" the problem is stupid, but when those a-holes think they can cut off or monitor all communication with you, THAT crosses the line.

    It's time to get serious and talk to an attorney. I went through a divorce in the past year and was hoping not to have to get an attorney involved (did you know that they are really expensive?), but I was glad I did. You have more parental rights than this. And your daughter is at the age where her choices matter.

    Dude, if money is an issue, I will gladly donate a couple bucks. It might not be enough to do much good, but from the fact that there are so many people following your story on this thread, I have a feeling I wouldn't be the only one.

    How do you think this stress is affecting your daughter??? It has to be taking a big toll on her. :frown:
  • 3ball
    3ball Posts: 338
    Thanks so much everyone. :-)


    How her mom and step-dad handled the situation last night kind of raises the red flag even more that there is more going on that I know. I mean, she asks her step-dad to stop creeping on her FB so much and the reaction is to remove him and my wife as friends on FB and take away her cell phone. WTF? And that's just the things that I know.

    My timing was horrible. I don't have her again until next Wednesday. That's a long time to have to wait to find out what really happened.
  • penrbrown
    penrbrown Posts: 2,685 Member
    What a sad situation. ):

    Hopefully everything turns out. Good for you for trying so hard to take care of her.
  • PlanetVelma
    PlanetVelma Posts: 1,223 Member
    Bad mouthing you is one thing (she's old enough to recognize it for what it is), unfriending both step parents on fb to "remove" the problem is stupid, but when those a-holes think they can cut off or monitor all communication with you, THAT crosses the line.

    It's time to get serious and talk to an attorney. I went through a divorce in the past year and was hoping not to have to get an attorney involved (did you know that they are really expensive?), but I was glad I did. You have more parental rights than this. And your daughter is at the age where her choices matter.

    Dude, if money is an issue, I will gladly donate a couple bucks. It might not be enough to do much good, but from the fact that there are so many people following your story on this thread, I have a feeling I wouldn't be the only one.

    How do you think this stress is affecting your daughter??? It has to be taking a big toll on her. :frown:

    Attorney costs aren't always super expensive, if you have an "Employee Assistance Program" (EAP) at your work (or your spouse's job), many times that program will refer to you to an attorney. My mom did that for me and I received 1 hour of free legal advice. The attorney I ended up hiring allowed me to make payments and gave me a discount (it was like 10-15% off) due to the EAP referral.

    There are great attorneys out there, it's just a matter of finding one that will work with you.

    I don't agree with your ex punishing your daughter, honestly, I would be consulting an attorney and at the bare minimum asking that the court mandate co-parenting classes for EVERYONE involved, therapy for your daughter and have the court evaulate the current custody/visitation arrangements. (Make sure you take in screen shots of the FB posts, start keeping a detailed journal w/ dates/times of these types of incidents and have all your ducks in a row before you visit with an attorney).

    It does sound like there's more going on...my dad used to tell me there are 3 sides to every story - your side, their side and the truth. It's all about perception.

    So who knows how the conversation went with your ex, it sounded like it was a total meltdown and your ex and her husband handled it poorly by allowing their emotions to dictate their response (instead of acting like rational beings). Unfortunately they probably just proved to your daughter that she cannot be honest and open with them...

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