The gym that causes me marriage stress!!

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  • IpuffyheartHeelsinthegym
    IpuffyheartHeelsinthegym Posts: 5,573 Member
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    Well this story didn't end up having the happiest of endings. By that I mean Zumba went under at the gym for not enough people :-D

    I bet that made you real sad... :laugh: :laugh: :laugh:
  • AdrianasMombieED
    AdrianasMombieED Posts: 117 Member
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    lol, sorry, but that is hilarious.
    But being distracted while lifting is so dangerous. Hopefully you work something out.
    I think I'd feel the same exact way as you.
    I'm actually trying to convince my fiance to do insanity with me since neither of us would be caught dead doing zumba either lol.
  • bethfartman
    bethfartman Posts: 363 Member
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    I don't find this story funny at all. Your wife sounds, at the least, annoying and quite possibly needs some serious counseling. She shouldn't be crying because you don't want to do something and she should really know that you wouldn't do that in the first place; you guys are married, right? I know what brand and style of peanut butter my bf likes, I certainly know he would not do Zumba with me.
    I find it kind of offensive people just chalk this up to being a crazy emotional woman, most women aren't like that at all.
  • EirePetal
    EirePetal Posts: 54 Member
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    My husband and I lift together. We both end up challenging each other to go harder. It's pretty cool because we are able to watch eachother's form and make sure our spouse stays safe. It is also nice to have a bit of a rest between sets as we take turns.
  • d2footballJRC
    d2footballJRC Posts: 2,684 Member
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    I don't find this story funny at all. Your wife sounds, at the least, annoying and quite possibly needs some serious counseling. She shouldn't be crying because you don't want to do something and she should really know that you wouldn't do that in the first place; you guys are married, right? I know what brand and style of peanut butter my bf likes, I certainly know he would not do Zumba with me.
    I find it kind of offensive people just chalk this up to being a crazy emotional woman, most women aren't like that at all.

    Just for the record this happened back in April 2012..

    I actually went to a zumba class and died out laughing and ended up really pissing her off. I couldn't stop laughing at the super bright dayglo outfits.. WHO WEARS THAT STUFF.
  • fannyfrost
    fannyfrost Posts: 756 Member
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    Well can't really blame it on the gym. Just thought I'd share a fun (not really) experience I've had lately and a bit of a rant. My wife, god bless her soul, decided she wants to work out with me. I'm all cool with that and I said okay we can go to the gym the same time. So we go, and I notice right away she apparently thinks this is going to be like a date. She hops on the elliptical and starts chatting as I rack weights to get ready to start my program. I put on my headphones and I start lifting, next thing I know as I'm doing my dumbbell bench press she is standing over me angry. I finish my rep sit up and pull my head phones off. She told me I was ignoring her, and she asked me a question. I told her, look, sweetie, I'm glad you came to the gym with me but you can't be talking to me. I'm trying to lift and I don't like people talking to me while I lift. This is why I've never gone to the gym with you before. I just can't lift, talk, and concentrate at the same time. She got all huffy and decided to play mad at me.

    Regardless next couple of days I go by myself and all is well. Then she comes home all excited and tells me, hey I'm going to the gym with you today.. I know right away this is going to be some combo of hell, a heavy dose of scorned woman, and that my workout is going to be absolute crap. We get there and as I'm racking weights she tells me.. YOU DON"T HAVE TO DO THAT. I signed us up for ZUMBA! They said you can work on your strength that way... .Well to put it mildly I flipped sh**. I will not...EVER..be caught doing ZUMBA. Not because I think it doesn't work, but because A. I don't want to B. I can't dance, and C. I like to pick things up and put them down. I tell her to go ahead I'm not doing it.

    She instead goes and cries in the locker room, so I had to quit my workout to go and talk to her. (Totally awesome to have to explain to a chick, "My wife is crying, can you go get her to bring to me") She tells me, I just want to work out with you. I explained to her this is my thing, I don't mind doing some cardio together on off days but when I lift I don't want anyone or anything to be bothering me. I also told her that I lift to help with stress and this has caused me a lot more stress. She then explains to me, how fitness has always been her thing, and now that I've gotten into it she wants to make it our thing. (I held back all urge to explain to her I'd rather cut off my hand, be fat, and die young than having to workout with her or do Zumba.)

    Now this may sound like I'm a horrible man, and who knows I might be! I don't mind do most things with my wife. I'll subject myself to shopping with her, I'll go see chick flicks, I love going to nice places to eat, I don't mind walks or going to the lake. Etc. Etc. I just do not under any circumstance want to workout with her. She doesn't seem to understand this and has been absolutely impossible to deal with the last week over this. At this point the saw and cutting my hands off is looking like a viable option!

    Anyone else have to deal with this? Besides using hypnosis, heavy drugs, sneaking out to the gym, hiring someone to be a workout buddy for your wife so she'll leave you alone... any resolutions/ideas/suggestions?

    I will tell you, honestly, I want my hubby to go to the gym, I will show him stuff, teach him the machines and lifting, but next time, go away this is my workout and this is my time. I really don't understand what her issue was, like you can't like different things at the gym? I would never ask my husband to come to Zumba. My daughter goes to Zumba with me and if we do other stuff too, she doesn't talk to me, we go our own way.

    Hope things have improved for you.
  • casmithis
    casmithis Posts: 216 Member
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    My husband and I are on totally opposite fitness pages. I admire the couples that could work out together and I'm a bit jealous. Like someone said, it's an extra hour together. BUT we do walk a lot together. We try to get out about 3 times a week. sometimes it's only 20 minutes if that's all we have. This is not so much for fitness (but I do log it) but to discuss our kids issues going on. It's a great time to chat about things you otherwise don't find the time to do.

    Would she power walk with you?
  • So_Much_Fab
    So_Much_Fab Posts: 1,146 Member
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    I know this is a zombie thread and all - but I suggest Prancersice for you two crazy kids to get your cardio on. :heart:

    happy-prancing.gif
  • zanne54
    zanne54 Posts: 336 Member
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    I don't find this story funny at all. Your wife sounds, at the least, annoying and quite possibly needs some serious counseling. She shouldn't be crying because you don't want to do something and she should really know that you wouldn't do that in the first place; you guys are married, right? I know what brand and style of peanut butter my bf likes, I certainly know he would not do Zumba with me.
    I find it kind of offensive people just chalk this up to being a crazy emotional woman, most women aren't like that at all.

    Just for the record this happened back in April 2012..

    I actually went to a zumba class and died out laughing and ended up really pissing her off. I couldn't stop laughing at the super bright dayglo outfits.. WHO WEARS THAT STUFF.
    I would have been right there, laughing too. I fail at being a girl sometimes. :D

    I hope you & your wife are getting along better now. It sounds like her expectations of "working out together" are/were completely whacked.
  • KatManx
    KatManx Posts: 168 Member
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    I go to the gym with my husband! BUT he does his thing, i do mine as we have different goals etc.

    Maybe you could workout a plan for her to follow and explain that you may have different goals to her but if you want to go to gym together, she needs to chill out and just get stuck into her own thing?? I dunno give it a try?
  • megalin9
    megalin9 Posts: 771 Member
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    I know this is a zombie thread and all - but I suggest Prancersice for you two crazy kids to get your cardio on. :heart:

    happy-prancing.gif

    Oh wow. She really DOES have a camel toe thing going on. Heh.
  • ms_erica
    ms_erica Posts: 173 Member
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    Dont think your a bad guy. She just wants to spend quality time with you thats all. Maybe talk to her when all is calm and agree on a day or two that you guys can workout together...or just go for a simple walk so you guys have downtime to talk.
  • Brutmar
    Brutmar Posts: 85
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    No, you are not an awful guy....you sound like a very sweet husband who cares about his wife's feelings. Seriously, I think your wife needs to get a grip....I totally understand wanting to spend time together, but couples also need time to do their own thing....and your own thing is lifting. And I really think she needs to respect that, I don't think she is being fair to you. Like others have suggested, I would stand your ground on your time alone to lift, but suggest work outs you could do together on your off days, or doing something together after the work out (go to the gym together, separate to do your individual work outs, and then come back together at the end and go out for coffee, smoothie, whatever). Good luck!

    I think you nailed it...couldn't have said it better myself!!
  • fit4lifeUcan2
    fit4lifeUcan2 Posts: 1,458 Member
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    When my husband and I were just dating he went with me to the gym and did his thing while I did mine. I couldn't imagine working out side by side together let alone zumba??? ugh!! NEVER!! The only exercise we do together is walking. And forget zumba! We do the horizontal mambo!

    Your wife seriously wants to work out "with" you? Really???? I just can't picture doing that.
  • Granada88
    Granada88 Posts: 40 Member
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    This is my situation. Only, with me it's my running program. My wife wants to make working out a family affair. I take our son to the playground and I run and play on the equipment and make it a obsticle course, or a game. But, she wants me to substitute my runs for family walks and things like that.

    I told her that I'd do whatever she wants to do...but, when we get home, I'm lacing up my shoes and go for my run...I don't care if it's 10 at night. She don't understand that we have two different mindsets as far as working out goes. She trains one way... I train another. Besides, I've been doing this L O N G before we ever got married. 14 years in, you'd think she'd have gotten used to it by now. lol...
  • laural007
    laural007 Posts: 251 Member
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    This made my day! LOL
  • DymonNdaRgh40
    DymonNdaRgh40 Posts: 661 Member
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    Aww! She just wants to work out with you. But at the same time I get your side. I too don't want to be bothered when I'm lifting and consider time spent in the gym as my time to release some stress and get it done. Her workouts must be totally different for her not to be understanding of this, however you may have to comprise a little. Found out what she wants to work on as far as toning or strength training and perhaps you can help her get started with lifting weights. Maybe you can have one day where you guys lift together. Of course if cardio is her thing you can do that together on different days.

    Hopefully, she'll come around.
  • Bigjuicyhog
    Bigjuicyhog Posts: 61 Member
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    Here is what you do. Go to the Zumba class. Proceed to do nothing but Chuck Norris roundhouse kicks the entire time. Make everyone around you uncomfortable. After you are done, tell your wife that is what it feels like when people bother you while lifting.
  • TiaXL
    TiaXL Posts: 31 Member
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    To funny! I felt the same way when I went with my husband. He was to busy wondering what I was doing and it drove him crazy that I could do dips and he couldn't.

    My suggestion: On your off days have her lift weights with you and continuously tell her to focus. Ultimately, she will get it as the weights get heavier.

    Good luck and thanks for the good story.
  • d2footballJRC
    d2footballJRC Posts: 2,684 Member
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    Here is what you do. Go to the Zumba class. Proceed to do nothing but Chuck Norris roundhouse kicks the entire time. Make everyone around you uncomfortable. After you are done, tell your wife that is what it feels like when people bother you while lifting.

    Can I pick the smallest and meekest person and stare at them the whole time that I'm doing the roundhouse kicks?

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