10 Things A Goblin Wants to Know About You

TheGoblinRoad

I made this quiz for Facebook friends. Just changed #4 to fit MFP (instead of the question that was promoting my book) Just for your entertainment and to pass the time!
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Goblins are generally not very talkative and would rather you leave them alone. However, give them a gallon of warm goat milk and they'll relax a bit. In which case they've got a pretty predictable set of questions to ask you. Feel free to post your answers, and we can keep those goblins lurking online happy.

We must go backwards:

10) On All-Hallows Eve (otherwise known as Halloween) what was your favorite disguise to try and fool us Goblins? (You failed, by the way.)

9) what would you sautee earthworms in?

8) Given the choice of hanging out with a goblin, or a pixie, which would you choose and why?

7) Have you always been prejudiced against goblins?

6) If you were to choose one magical power for a day, what would it be and why? (Goblins' power, however, is not an option since you who are born human cannot handle it. Don't feel bad, you're just inferior.)

5) Is it wrong to kidnap goats? Why? (And a bonus- what if the goat insults you?)

4) What would burn more calories, tossing a pixie as far as possible, or racing those pesky egoistic stone fauns? (Bonus: And Why?)

3) If a pixie falls in the forest, and no one is there to hear it, can we eat it for dinner?

2) If a few of us Goblins formed a Stone Band (I think that's what it's called) then what should we name it?

And the number 1 question:

1) What's the grossest thing you ever ate or slurped?

Questions provided courtesy of J.Parrish Lewis, with some editing provided since the goblin's grammar and vocabulary is astoundingly awful, but don't tell them he said so.

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TheGoblinRoad

My answers:

10) My lovely wife and I once went to a party as salt and pepper shakers. I was pepper. No sneezing occurred in my presence.

9) butter and cardamom, with a hint of garlic, and a dollop of peanut butter.

8) The pixie, but I'd want a slingshot.

7) I'm not prejudiced. I just know I'm better than goblins.

6) The power to turn any liquid into a mocha frappuchino with just one touch.

5) Yes, because goats are fine entertainers. However if he insults you, it's your duty to kidnap him and force the goat to watch 100 hours of Fantasy Island.

4) Can't go wrong with Pixy-Tossing. Builds your biceps.

3) Absolutely, my friend.

2) Low Thunk and the Grump

And the number 1 question:

1) What I thought was garlic bread with slices of cheese but turned out to be garlic bread with slices of baked mayo. UGH.

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skywalker

I think for #6 I'd turn liquid into wine... or beer. :laugh: :drinker: :laugh:
Interesting quiz...:happy:

TheGoblinRoad

Criss Angel did that once on his show. Pretty odd, not sure how he managed the trick. Went up to someone at a restaurant and picked up their water, held the glad out in his hands, and shook it. It turned into beer. Freaked out the diners.

I get tired of standard quizzes. Need a little fun, you know?

skywalker

Yeah, Criss Angel does some freaky stuff. I used to watch his show once in a while.
I noticed in your profile that you're from Exeter, Ca. Did you know there's also an Exeter, Pa.? :happy:

TheGoblinRoad

No, I didn't I hope the weather's better there. 100 degrees plus daily lately.

skywalker

Low 90s here with 100% humidity. Entirely too hot! :grumble: Don't know if you're a fan of The Office (I prefer the British version), but Exeter is only about 15min. from Scranton. I'm in the Scranton area. :huh:

ilike2moveit

This reminds me of something that my husband would think up. :laugh:
10. never dressed up but always dress up our munchkins
9. garlic and butter
8. pixie
7. yes
6. eat as much as I want without gaining weight
5. No- I love goat cheese
4. Tossing a pixie
3. I'm always hungry and I'll eat anything
2. Stonehenge
1. calamarie,

BrendaLee

10) On All-Hallows Eve (otherwise known as Halloween) what was your favorite disguise to try and fool us Goblins? (You failed, by the way.) My friend and I, for some reason, liked dressing up as hookers on Halloween. Yah, I know.

9) what would you sautee earthworms in? Ew. Margarine.

8) Given the choice of hanging out with a goblin, or a pixie, which would you choose and why? A goblin, most definitely. I want to be enlightened on the post-death happenings. I figure a goblin would know. Wait, that's a ghoul. Actually, it's a ghost. Jeez.

7) Have you always been prejudiced against goblins? No, never. Well, there was that one time.

6) If you were to choose one magical power for a day, what would it be and why? (Goblins' power, however, is not an option since you who are born human cannot handle it. Don't feel bad, you're just inferior.) Invisibility without a doubt.

5) Is it wrong to kidnap goats? Why? (And a bonus- what if the goat insults you?) Well, it depends...what are you going to do to the goat?

4) What would burn more calories, tossing a pixie as far as possible, or racing those pesky egoistic stone fauns? (Bonus: And Why?) I have no idea what a stone faun is, but it sounds heavy, so it probably can't run very fast.

3) If a pixie falls in the forest, and no one is there to hear it, can we eat it for dinner? That's just wrong. We'd need a whole flock of pixies to feed us all.

2) If a few of us Goblins formed a Stone Band (I think that's what it's called) then what should we name it? Gob5

And the number 1 question:

1) What's the grossest thing you ever ate or slurped? In my adult years- nothing, but when I was a child my mother used to feed us all sorts of icky things. Salmon eggs (known amongst the elite as caviar, I believe, but fried. Ew. We called them Rosies). That, and partridge...or deer.

CasperO

10) On All-Hallows Eve (otherwise known as Halloween) what was your favorite disguise to try and fool us Goblins? (You failed, by the way.)
<<"Angry drifter" from an old slasher flick. I was already angry, and I had the clothes...>>

9) what would you sautee earthworms in?
<<A pan. Duh.>>

8) Given the choice of hanging out with a goblin, or a pixie, which would you choose and why?
<<I would hang with both, and try to get them involved, so I could shoot video, and post it on the web>>

7) Have you always been prejudiced against goblins?
<<I was an abused child.>>

6) If you were to choose one magical power for a day, what would it be and why? (Goblins' power, however, is not an option since you who are born human cannot handle it. Don't feel bad, you're just inferior.)
<<The power of instant sleep. Then I'd miss the whole day. Sleeping>>

5) Is it wrong to kidnap goats? Why? (And a bonus- what if the goat insults you?)
<<I'm a Baaaa-aaad boy>>

4) What would burn more calories, tossing a pixie as far as possible, or racing those pesky egoistic stone fauns? (Bonus: And Why?)
<<Pixie tossing is easy, cookie tossing is hard. The fauns are not as fast as they think they are>>
<<Why?, 'cause they're made of stone. Look at all the racing greats,,, Petty, Spitz, Tereshkova,,, none made of stone>>

3) If a pixie falls in the forest, and no one is there to hear it, can we eat it for dinner?
<<Only if you serve with a side of okra. Boiled not fried>>

2) If a few of us Goblins formed a Stone Band (I think that's what it's called) then what should we name it?
<<Tubular Luggage>>

And the number 1 question:

1) What's the grossest thing you ever ate or slurped?
<<Get your own ideas. Mine are mine,,, :drinker: >>

TheGoblinRoad

Gotta say it- I love the band names you've all come up with.

My favorite from Facebook friend:

Bang Smash.



If you're curious, I have a 2-chapter excerpt of my book on my site, free to read. Www.thegoblinroad.com.

Phoenix_Rising

bump for Halloween