going dutch on a first date

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Replies

  • sizzle74
    sizzle74 Posts: 858 Member
    Sorry for quoting it wrong up there, but I can't fix it. Oh no. lol
  • Heitor71
    Heitor71 Posts: 224
    A true gentleman will be more than happy to pay.
  • RllyGudTweetr
    RllyGudTweetr Posts: 2,019 Member
    If a guy has asked ME out for dinner then he should pay. You don't invite someone for dinner and not pay, it's bad manners.

    I have never gone dutch with a guy - ever. Either he pays the whole bill or I do. I think going dutch is a bigger thing in the US than in the UK.
    If a female friend of yours asked you out to dinner, should she pay?
  • susheetush
    susheetush Posts: 621 Member
    I love being a woman too. I love men. I also don't expect for a man to do things for me. I like it when he does (as my guy does) but he likes it that I don't expect it. I am a feminist in that I believe in women having a right to make decisions for themselves, but I appreciate chivalrous gestures and appreciate the differences between men and women either, be it physical, financial or emotional.

    Today a man carried my tiny little suitcase up the stairs for me. It was a lovely gesture, and I was appropriately thankful, but I would have been just as happy to do it myself and not think less of him for not having done it.
  • 1nr15
    1nr15 Posts: 155
    NO NO NO
  • smilingdaisies
    smilingdaisies Posts: 76 Member
    @ JohnMessner: Loved your post and agree with you. When I began dating, after leaving a 20 year marriage, I struggled with this. I do believe that it is an issue of respect but truthfully, I just started feeling odd with the men always paying and it not developing into anything serious. I started requested coffee dates for the first date...not a lot of money is spent and we would quickly know if a second date was wanted.

    Luckily, I'm out of the dating scene and ladies, chivalry is not dead BUT if you expect chivalry on his part, then you should embrace the qualities of women those chivalrous men are looking for too.
  • scarlettsky7
    scarlettsky7 Posts: 128 Member
    apologies for offending any dutch folks out there (didnt even think about that!!) so many wonderful suggestions and interesting viewpoints on this subject!! :)

    i love a man who can write sensitive poetry and shoot a shotgun. a man who takes care of me and completely "spoils" me even though i dont need any of it simply because he adores me. in conjunction i like to set a standard so high that no woman can compare to me. i want to be able to swear like a sailor and work towards my doctorate w/out being seen as too independent or intimidating. i dont want children or to be questioned time and time again why not. in my attempt to liberate myself, i do not want to emasculate a man as a result.

    *steps off the soap box*
  • scarlettsky7
    scarlettsky7 Posts: 128 Member
    http://i.justrealized.com/media/2008/06/for-every-girl-there-is-a-boy.png

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