Embarrassed to go jogging because of pervs.

BeachGingerOnTheRocks

Okay so I was out and about yesterday and this guy chased me down to hand me a flyer to sign up for a bikini contest next Friday night.

That was pretty cool.

Carry on.

RainHoward

Okay so I was out and about yesterday and this guy chased me down to hand me a flyer to sign up for a bikini contest next Friday night.

That was pretty cool.

Carry on.

how do we get tickets to that event????

InnerConflict

This may sound creepy, but I'm pretty sure no one will say anything. I see people running in the cemetary.

mommylifter

The simple fact that they now make running pants with built in gun holsters in the back waist band makes me refuse to go out for a run. Forget the pervs, I'm too scared of what else is out there....

InnerConflict

Okay so I was out and about yesterday and this guy chased me down to hand me a flyer to sign up for a bikini contest next Friday night.

That was pretty cool.

Carry on.

You certainly rock a bikini

BinaryPulsar

Okay so I was out and about yesterday and this guy chased me down to hand me a flyer to sign up for a bikini contest next Friday night.

That was pretty cool.

Carry on.

Woo Hoo!! :drinker:

CorvusCorax77

Wow what did I come back to?

The Smith College reunion thread

Cornell grad here.

CorvusCorax77

Here's some helpful information for those who are totally ignorant on the subject:

1 in 5 women have been raped according to the CDC. Of those, 12% were raped before age 11. 1in 4 women have been the victim of violence from a partner.

http://www.cdc.gov/violenceprevention/pdf/nisvs_factsheet-a.pdf

Here is a helpful graphic and information about the graphic. One important thing to note about this is that false rape reports are low (about 2%) and VERY VERY VERY RARELY does a false report of rape ever name the perp. Most false rapes reported are reports of stranger rapes.

http://theenlivenproject.com/the-truth-about-false-accusation/

And these are the ones that are REPORTED. Many women don't report being raped.
And children can't.

Do you have statistics on the number of unreported rapes? How were they derived?

You have access to google. Look it up. Generally tho, the term "reported" means reported to the police. The CDC study may actually include rapes not reported to the police, but reported in other ways (sociological studies, perhaps.... Or perhaps from rape crisis centers or from counselors).

I ask because the very nature of "unreported rapes" makes them all but impossible to compile statistically. I ask because I have had professors and "workplace harassment workshop leaders" throw numbers at the classes/workshop I was in that indicated that 7 out of every 5 women were rape victims. That's not a typo: they presented numbers indicating that more than 100% of women had been raped, *not* counting women who were attacked more than once. This was not an isolated incident of one person who didn't understand how to read statistics, because it was multiple people in multiple settings.

You do understand why I am somewhat skeptical of these numbers?

Yes of course I understand. It isn't more than 100%. I know at least one woman who wasn't raped, molested, or beaten. It does happen. And it doesn't help anyone to throw out numbers that are completely off- especially when something is already a very verifiable epidemic.

One thing I think is good to note- the average rapist racks up six victims. Just because a disturbingly large number of women have been sexually assaulted does not mean a disturbingly large number of men are rapists. I don't think anyone has been trying to say that (despit Davpaul's ignorant post here). What *is* common, and totally logical, is for women who have experienced sexual violence or sexually motivated violence to be a bit fearful. I don't think it's "rape mongering" (this is in response to dav not you) to talk about something that is a serious problem.

I agree this is a bit off topic from OP .... But not really if she is scared of sexual harassment. Harassment that is sexually motivated is part of a spectrum of sexually motivated antisocial behavior which includes rape and murder. No, it's not rape and of course people who engage in harassment may have a moral compass that would prevent them from physically harming someone. I think the point one poster here may be trying to make is that some who engage in sexual harassment may be ignorant of how it can e harmful even if they never touch the woman- perhaps their behavior isn't antisocial but just simply ignorance.

CorvusCorax77

this thread has taken a serious turn for the worse. for goodness sake even the OP wasn't concerned about being physically assaulted. by her own words she was made to feel uncomfortable by comments that passerby would make as she was running. I'm firmly in the "suck it up, buttercup" camp, but i can understand how people feel differently.

so someone PUHLEEEZE tell me how a thread that was basically "sticks and stones will break my bones but words can never hurt me" has turned into fear mongering rape thread? yes, rape is a serious and pervasive threat, but this wasn't a rape thread. "nice *kitten*!" yelled from a car window is neither rape nor a sign of impending assault.

But here's the thing: the woman you are yelling "nice *kitten*!" at does not KNOW you. She doesn't KNOW your intention. She doesn't KNOW your history. The assault statistics reported above are not inflated. They are real. Most women (most people, actually, if they bothered to ask) know several other women who have been raped or assaulted or at least had an attempt made, so we have to be on our guard.

Whether or not your intention is just to make a catcall or to escalate that into something more, the person you are directing this at has no way of knowing. On a more basic level, it all still stems from the same cultural attitude where men feel they have a RIGHT to sexualize a complete stranger. Would you say "nice *kitten*!" to your college professor, or to your child's teacher, or to your doctor? No. Because it's disrespectful. I'm out here running because I'm running. Not because I have any interest in being your eye candy. If you want to be complimentary and supportive, and you feel you need to inflict yourself on to a complete stranger, support their EFFORT ("keep it up!" "you're doing great!") instead of diminishing everything about that person to their sexual attractiveness.

you're right. all women should assume all men are going to rape them all the time. and every conversation about anything should turn to a conversation about rape, because rape is all that happens in the world, ever. it's not a question of have you been raped, it's have you been raped YET. so yes, you're jogging down a public street in broad daylight and there are dozens of witnesses, but you damn well be protecting yourself because if someone yells "Nice rack!" they are probably going to rape you right there in the middle of Main Street at 4pm.

because rape rape rape rape rape rape rape rape rape rape rape rape rape rape rape rape rape rape rape rape rape rape rape rape rape rape rape rape rape rape rape rape rape rape rape rape rape rape rape rape rape rape rape rape rape rape rape rape






and rape

It is called PTSD. You may have heard it mentioned in the news at some point in the last 40 years since Vietnam???

You also totally ignored her other point about not sexualizing a perfect stranger.

But yeah sure. Obviously some women in this thread have experienced rape so you want to be a gentleman and say rape a bunch of times because *kitten*

*kitten* *kitten* *kitten* *kitten* *kitten*....

DavPul

sorry, didn't hear you. i was in the middle of empowering my two daughters to have the courage to walk outside.

BeachIron

Wow what did I come back to?

The Smith College reunion thread

Cornell grad here.

My point was that a thread about jogging outside has been turned into a thread about rape. I have a wife and 2 daughters, it's not like the issue hasn't crossed my mind. Then again, my wife is a strong woman and knows how to protect herself pretty well, and we're raising our daughters to also be strong. It's better than staying inside frightened of the world. And no, I am not minimizing the impact of rape on a woman's life, but this thread wasn't about that until it took this turn.

Like I said to the OP previously, learn to be aware, not frightened of the world, and I frankly agree with DavPul on this. Raise your daughters to be strong.

CorvusCorax77

sorry, didn't hear you. i was in the middle of empowering my two daughters to have the courage to walk outside.

I just saw ur post on beachiron's page. I really wish you had spoken like this here instead of saying what you did. I do not think women are doomed to be raped. I do not think men who shout "nice *kitten*" are rapists. I don't think women should not live life to the fullest because rape happens.

I do think the woman's point was totally taken wrong by you- her point was about trauma and living in a culture where rape is unfortunately very common- and simply wanting people to understand why a woman may be scared.

Please raise your daughters to be strong and empowered. And I will raise my son to respect women and men.

But also please understand that rape happens. It happens to women you know and love and it's scary and it hurts and comments like the one you said is kinda, well, ****ty.

CorvusCorax77

Wow what did I come back to?

The Smith College reunion thread

Cornell grad here.

My point was that a thread about jogging outside has been turned into a thread about rape. I have a wife and 2 daughters, it's not like the issue hasn't crossed my mind. Then again, my wife is a strong woman and knows how to protect herself pretty well, and we're raising our daughters to also be strong. It's better than staying inside frightened of the world. And no, I am not minimizing the impact of rape on a woman's life, but this thread wasn't about that until it took this turn.

Like I said to the OP previously, learn to be aware, not frightened of the world, and I frankly agree with DavPul on this. Raise your daughters to be strong.

When I came into the thread, people were saying **** like rape doesn't happen that much and women cry rape when he didn't call the next day.

I can't not say something... And it sucks to be confronted with comments like yours because I won't remain silent when people say things like that

stephaniemejia1671

I found a park that has a trail with gravel and is well populated during the day. I can run in a circle for miles without a care as to oncoming traffic and that makes me happy. The people who are there are also doing the same thing I am, being that everyone is in the same space they stick to their stuff and I to mine - everyone happy.

BeachIron

Wow what did I come back to?

The Smith College reunion thread

Cornell grad here.

My point was that a thread about jogging outside has been turned into a thread about rape. I have a wife and 2 daughters, it's not like the issue hasn't crossed my mind. Then again, my wife is a strong woman and knows how to protect herself pretty well, and we're raising our daughters to also be strong. It's better than staying inside frightened of the world. And no, I am not minimizing the impact of rape on a woman's life, but this thread wasn't about that until it took this turn.

Like I said to the OP previously, learn to be aware, not frightened of the world, and I frankly agree with DavPul on this. Raise your daughters to be strong.

When I came into the thread, people were saying **** like rape doesn't happen that much and women cry rape when he didn't call the next day.

I can't not say something... And it sucks to be confronted with comments like yours because I won't remain silent when people say things like that

There were one or two posters who stated that they have the opinion that rape statistics are inflated. To be honest, I think it would be an interesting discussion on statistics if it wasn't so emotionally charged. The problem is that this entire thread has gone off the rails because of the emotional charged word "rape" starting getting thrown around a bit too casually, and I honestly think that is what DavPul was responding to. I do not pretend to speak for him, however, as he's more than capable of speaking for himself.

I can tell you that as a man, the rape conversation as it's gone in this thread disturbs me. There is quite a distance between the man that would actually rape and the man that has no compunction about walking up to a woman and complementing her. And I'm sorry, but for every woman who deals with cat calls there's another overreacting about a guy saying anything at all to her. Then again, there's another college girl jumping into cars with guys she doesn't know because she's on Spring Break and feeling "frisky." I've seen it all. So yes, there's two sides to every story.

But back to the point of this thread. It was about a woman who was afraid to jog because someone might or would say something to her. No one here knows much more than that, but EVERYONE of us dropped out own world views into our reactions to her. And for that we ARE ALL guilty.

CorvusCorax77

Wow what did I come back to?

The Smith College reunion thread

Cornell grad here.

My point was that a thread about jogging outside has been turned into a thread about rape. I have a wife and 2 daughters, it's not like the issue hasn't crossed my mind. Then again, my wife is a strong woman and knows how to protect herself pretty well, and we're raising our daughters to also be strong. It's better than staying inside frightened of the world. And no, I am not minimizing the impact of rape on a woman's life, but this thread wasn't about that until it took this turn.

Like I said to the OP previously, learn to be aware, not frightened of the world, and I frankly agree with DavPul on this. Raise your daughters to be strong.

When I came into the thread, people were saying **** like rape doesn't happen that much and women cry rape when he didn't call the next day.

I can't not say something... And it sucks to be confronted with comments like yours because I won't remain silent when people say things like that

There were one or two posters who stated that they have the opinion that rape statistics are inflated. To be honest, I think it would be an interesting discussion on statistics if it wasn't so emotionally charged. The problem is that this entire thread has gone off the rails because of the emotional charged word "rape" starting getting thrown around a bit too casually, and I honestly think that is what DavPul was responding to. I do not pretend to speak for him, however, as he's more than capable of speaking for himself.

I can tell you that as a man, the rape conversation as it's gone in this thread disturbs me. There is quite a distance between the man that would actually rape and the man that has no compunction about walking up to a woman and complementing her. And I'm sorry, but for every woman who deals with cat calls there's another overreacting about a guy saying anything at all to her. Then again, there's another college girl jumping into cars with guys she doesn't know because she's on Spring Break and feeling "frisky." I've seen it all. So yes, there's two sides to every story.

But back to the point of this thread. It was about a woman who was afraid to jog because someone might or would say something to her. No one here knows much more than that, but EVERYONE of us dropped out own world views into our reactions to her. And for that we ARE ALL guilty.

The end of your post totally made me wanna cue up Fugazi's suggestion. Ends the same way

Mlkmaid

They're called HEADPHONES. LOL.

Sarauk2sf

this thread has taken a serious turn for the worse. for goodness sake even the OP wasn't concerned about being physically assaulted. by her own words she was made to feel uncomfortable by comments that passerby would make as she was running. I'm firmly in the "suck it up, buttercup" camp, but i can understand how people feel differently.

so someone PUHLEEEZE tell me how a thread that was basically "sticks and stones will break my bones but words can never hurt me" has turned into fear mongering rape thread? yes, rape is a serious and pervasive threat, but this wasn't a rape thread. "nice *kitten*!" yelled from a car window is neither rape nor a sign of impending assault.

But here's the thing: the woman you are yelling "nice *kitten*!" at does not KNOW you. She doesn't KNOW your intention. She doesn't KNOW your history. The assault statistics reported above are not inflated. They are real. Most women (most people, actually, if they bothered to ask) know several other women who have been raped or assaulted or at least had an attempt made, so we have to be on our guard.

Whether or not your intention is just to make a catcall or to escalate that into something more, the person you are directing this at has no way of knowing. On a more basic level, it all still stems from the same cultural attitude where men feel they have a RIGHT to sexualize a complete stranger. Would you say "nice *kitten*!" to your college professor, or to your child's teacher, or to your doctor? No. Because it's disrespectful. I'm out here running because I'm running. Not because I have any interest in being your eye candy. If you want to be complimentary and supportive, and you feel you need to inflict yourself on to a complete stranger, support their EFFORT ("keep it up!" "you're doing great!") instead of diminishing everything about that person to their sexual attractiveness.

you're right. all women should assume all men are going to rape them all the time. and every conversation about anything should turn to a conversation about rape, because rape is all that happens in the world, ever. it's not a question of have you been raped, it's have you been raped YET. so yes, you're jogging down a public street in broad daylight and there are dozens of witnesses, but you damn well be protecting yourself because if someone yells "Nice rack!" they are probably going to rape you right there in the middle of Main Street at 4pm.

because rape rape rape rape rape rape rape rape rape rape rape rape rape rape rape rape rape rape rape rape rape rape rape rape rape rape rape rape rape rape rape rape rape rape rape rape rape rape rape rape rape rape rape rape rape rape rape rape






and rape

Wow - over-react much? I have no idea how you possibly got *that* from the post.

Alex

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