Overcoming Life Changing Events

saraifoss
saraifoss Posts: 9
in Introduce Yourself
Hi Everyone,

I am here because I have gained 33 lbs since I had my daughter who is now 15months old. Yes instead of losing the baby fat, I gained more. The new baby really caused a chaotic change to our schedule. Even though, I have two boys adding one more child to the mix put me into overload. Also, since then my husband and I have had unhealthy relationship and we filed for divorce set to finalize in October. All this stress has made me weak inside and I have no motivation or the will power to eat healthy. I hope I can find support on this site. I am astonished at all the success stories I have seen here. I need friends that have overcome life changing events and made it out of depression and on to a new bright life.

Replies

  • isolde007
    isolde007 Posts: 1
    Hey,
    just joined this site. First, congratulations on the new baby!
    I am getting divorced as well--final in November. Its very stressful--I get it. I am finding new strength in myself though. I am making taking care of myself a priority. For you, it will be your children first of course and then you, but its still important that you take the time to care for your mind body and spirit. You will be better off. I dont mean to sound harsh, but no one is going to do it for you. Stay strong!

    Carol
  • saraifoss
    saraifoss Posts: 9
    Thanks Carol, and no worries about the harsh words I need honest friends can I add you?
  • perincesk
    perincesk Posts: 3 Member
    Hi! I've been using this site off and on for a while, but I'm making a new commitment to it. I, too, am going through stress and find myself turning to food and laying on the couch. My husband has been unemployed since June, forcing us to live on my teacher salary alone with our two kids. My youngest is 20 months, but I can't use baby weight as an excuse, because I actually didn't gain that much weight with her. It was all afterwards. Like I said, though, I'm making a new commitment.
  • bf43005
    bf43005 Posts: 287
    I am not going thru a divorce and don't have kids but I do struggle with depression. From that side of it I can tell you that there are a lot of days where I really have to force myself to work out, or not go over my calories. But I always feel better afterwards. I do a good workout and push myself and I feel proud. Now that I am a few months into this I try to hold onto how I know I will feel after the workout to get my butt moving. Having support helps as well, maybe make it a family walk with the kids, or get a friend or neighbor, to help keep you motivated. Whatever you do remember you can do this, it will be hard but you are making a healthier body and that will also help your kids. Stay positive & best of luck. Feel free to add me as a friend if you want.
  • staling007
    staling007 Posts: 5 Member
    That which doesn't kill you makes you stronger.

    About 5 years ago, my best friend, married mother of 3 kids, committed suicide out of the blue. I struggled with her death for a very long time and in fact, still struggle with it at times because I miss her. Looking back, I don't think she had something that was just for her and she was just exhausted. Most moms tends to lose their identity after having kids. We wear so many hats and have to do so many different things it's really difficult sometimes to tjust ake care of ourselves. But we need to! Find something you love to do...swimming, hiking, running, gardening, walking...or take up a new hobby and learn something new. I've made so many new friends just by taking up running. It's been life changing for me.

    To make changes stick for the long haul, set small realistic goals for yourself and try to stick with small changes instead of completely overhauling your diet and exercise all at once. With each accomplishment, you will feel better about yourself and bring yourself out of that depression. You can do it!!!! Be strong!!!!
  • cjbester
    cjbester Posts: 17 Member
    I want you to know that I'm praying for you. October is just a few weeks away, and you may go through a little bit of sadness or depression again, but I want to encourage you to look forward and not back. Everyday you wake up is a new opportunity, so what you missed the day before, just work on being better at the moment you are in. I have gone through much more than you disclosed and my life is better, it has changed, and did not happen overnight, but I MADE IT! You will too, just hang in there and remember, you don't have to go through it by yourself.

    Stay Encouraged. ; )
  • dogo187
    dogo187 Posts: 376
    i know all about life changing...

    moving 30,000 miles to another country, in a part of the world that is like a different planet....

    having two children in three years and a husband who works out of the country 10 months of the year....

    moving to get to know the family of the man that you married only to find out they want nothing to do with you or your children...

    yeah, LIFE CHANGING...

    dont make excuses...make a plan instead!!!!

    add me if you like....
  • saraifoss
    saraifoss Posts: 9
    Thanks so much for the kind words, they are medicine to my soul. I have gone through much worse in the past then my current situation like the death of my father and i overcame then I can do it again. I just have to find myself, It's true I have lost my identity.

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