Online Dating!

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  • silvergurl518
    silvergurl518 Posts: 4,123 Member
    I haven't had much luck with dating lately so I am thinking of doing online dating. I'm kind of nervous about it though!

    I was hoping you guys could share your experiences with online dating. Any tips or advice?

    Thanks! :)

    And also which site is the best? Haha, I don't know what site I should use!

    Out of curiosity..where are you located? Sometimes that can have a swing on who you're meeting online in certain areas. I know DC area can be interesting..I'll put it that way!!

    TO SAY THE LEAST!! hahaha. oy vey. i met my ex on OKC...but i've also "met" plenty of catfishers too. staying off for a while....
  • lilRicki
    lilRicki Posts: 4,555 Member
    I went through a few duds, but that's to be expected. I am now marrying a man I met off POF. We would have never met if we weren't online. I was a student and he was a single father working in the oil patch. My advice to you, meet in public places, don't give him your home address, and keep it casual for awhile. You might think you know a person because you've been chatting with them online for a few weeks, but you don't. Lots are out for a booty call, women too, but keep your mind open and have fun. The best part are all the dates you get to go on.
  • denisedavis1976
    denisedavis1976 Posts: 7 Member
    Don't worry I have not had luck all of my life with dating.
  • 09nat13
    09nat13 Posts: 38 Member
    Met my husband on match.com We have just celebrated are three year anniversary So don't give up
  • Cortneyrenee04
    Cortneyrenee04 Posts: 1,117 Member
    I met my boyfriend of 2.5 years on line! We met on okcupid.com and met two weeks later. Moved in together after four months and together still :) love him!
  • Renegade706
    Renegade706 Posts: 209
    whatever site you use, my adice would be not to date anyone that has not been single for at least 6 months or so. I had to weed out alot of still angry, hurt, not over it women to get some good dates. Alot of people on there arent ready, they are just lonely. Kind of sad actually. Im sure its even worse for a female. You have to watch out for the tell you whatever you want to hear to get in your pants guys. Good luck to you!
  • strikerjb007
    strikerjb007 Posts: 443 Member
    I haven't had much luck with dating lately so I am thinking of doing online dating. I'm kind of nervous about it though!

    I was hoping you guys could share your experiences with online dating. Any tips or advice?

    Thanks! :)

    And also which site is the best? Haha, I don't know what site I should use!

    Met my ex and my current girlfriend online. I have been with her for 8 months now and things are going great. I have used match.com and eharmony. I live in a populated area so eHarmony worked very well for me. It's a matter of luck. You will find some crazy people and some normal. Good Luck.
  • UrbanLotus
    UrbanLotus Posts: 1,163 Member
    It's just another way to meet people- in my area seriously everyone I know does it. Just like in real life, there will be creeps - but you are only looking for 1 person so it doesn't matter how many creeps there are. Just talk to people who have multiple pics and don't seem shady, meet them soon and in a public place. From then on it's just like normal dating - I've had multiple boyfriends I met online and have been to multiple weddings of people who met online - in fact my profile pic is from on last weekend, they met on OKcupid!
  • djeffreys10
    djeffreys10 Posts: 2,312 Member
    A quick rundown of online dating

    If you have the vaj and are even remotely aesthetically pleasing (say 5 and up/10), you get inundated with tons of emails. You pic the attractive pictures, delete the rest. Then check profiles to weed out the ones you reply to.

    If you have the d, you send an email to every profile that has a remotely aesthetically pleasing pic hoping to make the cut, and rarely get a reply because the odds just aren't in your favor. However, if you are aesthetic (say 7 and up/10), you will get quite a few messages from 0-3 or so/10 thinking they have a shot.

    Basically, as a female you can generally date 2-3 notches above your level (aesthetically speaking), whereas a male generally has to drop a couple notches below his level to have consistent results.

    Call me shallow, but that is the reality as confirmed by personal experience as well as several others, male and female included.

    From reading a massive dating thread elsewhere, it seems to be about right.

    So, where can I get one of these vajs of which you speak?

    You are very unlikely to get it on a dating site, you're willing to shoot about 2-3 notches below your level lol
  • djeffreys10
    djeffreys10 Posts: 2,312 Member
    Basically, as a female you can generally date 2-3 notches above your level (aesthetically speaking), whereas a male generally has to drop a couple notches below his level to have consistent results.

    In my experience it's not that men have to settle a couple of notches below their worth ("aesthetically speaking"), but that 'some' men have a rather inflated sense of self esteem, to make them think that, at age 50 with a massive gut and no hair, they can pull the 20-somethings in their bikinis slurping cocktails seductively through a straw... :huh:

    And it's not just about looks. I was approached by many a bicep-kisser, where the first message makes it clear that he has achieved nothing other than... bicep..., is completely illiterate, operates in a complete cerebral vacuum but still thinks he's the mutt's nuts! :noway:

    While *some*men have that mentality, you're kidding yourself if you think what I posted is not the overall experience. There are a few exceptions, but exceptions do not make rule. What I posted is by and large the way it works.

    And guys that have only achieved biceps are retard. Gotta get the full body worked for a well rounded physique :-P
  • djshari
    djshari Posts: 513 Member
    I've tried it. It wasn't for me. I reactive my okcupid account every couple months when I'm feeling bored and quickly deactivate it. I don't "click" with very many guys in general even if we do have a lot in common. I don't like the idea of meeting someone who is more or less a stranger and can't shake the feeling that I'm being judged and weighed against the guys ideas of a good lay, gf, wife, etc. I also feel when I put up my best photos that I look much better than I do in person and someone will think I lied. I wanted to put up an awful photo of myself but my friends told me not to and while I thought it was funny I see their point. Most guys don't want to talk much before meeting - and I understand that - see if there is a spark so we aren't wasting time right? Well I don't want to waste a bunch of time meeting guys when I can tell after chatting for a few days that I might not get along with them. It's a catch 22. I did meet one guy - we seemed to have a lot to talk about before meeting but when we did meet it was very meh. He seemed a lot older (not physically just in general) and while it wasn't a horrible experience it wasn't a great one either.

    The first time I signed up I used a photo from the waist up because I am a bigger girl and wanted that to be clear from the start but that just got me lots of messages about my boobs. It calmed down once I took that photo down.

    My biggest problem would be guys who don't have much to say or trail off and really pushy guys. If I tell you more than once that I am not interested in meeting until I know you better and you keep asking me "what about tomorrow night" I'm going to stop talking to you because you are already annoying the crap out of me.

    There were a few guys that I thought were probably pretty nice but I don't feel I could really get to know them on there and didn't want any of the pressure with meeting them in person. I just hate "dating" in general. All of the guys I've had relationships with I knew them as coworkers or friends or friends of friends so it wasn't so weird - even a few online ones from gaming.
  • justicer68
    justicer68 Posts: 1,223

    * Don't discount someone just because you don't think their pics are that great. I did NOT think my fiance chose good pics for his profile. I looked at it for months and skipped over it every time because I didn't feel attracted to him. When I finally gave him a chance and met in person, he looked TOTALLY different in a good way! Instant sparks!



    <
    Some people are not photogenic and look way better in person

    Yes....I feel exactly the same.
  • Alyssah09
    Alyssah09 Posts: 357 Member
    I met my fiance on a dating website and we now have an awesome 2 week old son!
  • Nancy_CM
    Nancy_CM Posts: 20 Member
    I signed up for OKCupid, as well. It's been hit or miss - but, I'm definitely having fun, and have gotten some great stories out of the experiences. :-) The above advice is very sound, and actually easy to follow. Just be aware and pay attention to signs and clues.

    Never knew MFP was also a dating site! HA! It's delightful to read that some of the couples met here. When someone is right, here's hoping that you find them who-knows-where!
  • marionmmm
    marionmmm Posts: 61
    writeaprisoner dot com
  • Serenitytoo
    Serenitytoo Posts: 449 Member
    I tried several sites when I was single. You have to weed through a lot, but it can work. I met my boyfriend on POF over a year ago and we have been living together for 2 months now. I was about ready to give up for good and he was just signing back on after a few months break. We were meant to meet. (ok our paths had crossed before, but never officially met until I approached him on the site)

    My best advice is be honest, don't let the picture alone dictate who you meet, and go with your gut instinct.

    Good luck! :flowerforyou:
  • tmm_0127
    tmm_0127 Posts: 545 Member
    I'm with my boyfriend I met on OkCupid for almost 2 years now. I also tried match.com and eharmony.com, but it all depends on what you're looking for because they all seem to cater to different types of people - also, OKC is free and most other sites are not. It's real hit and miss with all of them, but worth a try I think. :)
  • Nostawyn
    Nostawyn Posts: 1 Member
    I actually joined OKC to laugh at the creepers and wound up meeting my amazing boyfriend through it. There are genuine people on there who want more than just a hookup and the more of those little quiz questions you answer, the better the match you find.

    Always be really careful with what you put on those sites and say to people, though. My boyfriend accidentally gave away so much that I wound up knowing his home address before we'd ever met. (He linked me to a video on his YouTube account, where I found another video with his name on it, found him on Facebook to make sure he was legit and his address was public.)
  • bluestarlight19
    bluestarlight19 Posts: 419 Member
    Well...there is always craigslist :smooched:

    I met my husband online, though not on a dating site. It was a forum for an anime convention. My friend and I were looking for more friends our age to hang out with at the convention and he was too. So we met at the convention after a few nervous conversions and hit it off :) (go geek powah!) Started dating, moved in at the end of the year...got engaged at the same anime convention the next year. Now we have been married for almost 3 years and have 2 beautiful daughters. :)

    Just try it and have fun with it. I wasn't looking for anything serious but I found him :)
  • torabelle79
    torabelle79 Posts: 63 Member
    I met my current boyfriend on a dating site. Only been together five months, but he's lovely....and we're off to Paris together next month! So I'd recommend it!!!

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