The awesomest thing your kid has ever said...

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  • SweetTea111104
    SweetTea111104 Posts: 338 Member
    this is from 2008... I will always love this story:

    So, today started off quite interesting. As usual, I was a pack mule leaving the house being laden with my bag, purse, book, and some fruit along with carrying the youngest minion (who, at 8 months, has been out of the infant carrier for almost a month now) - and the oldest minion was carrying the bag that goes to day care. The back deck that we have to cross to get from the house to the garage was covered in a thin layer of frost. I told the older boy it was slippery, and had him walk ahead of me. He gets down the stairs and to the sidewalk with no problem.

    The next thing I know, my foot is sliding off the stairs and I am trying desperately to not drop the baby or land on him as I fall. The little guy unfortunately hits his head on the post of the deck, not hard but enough to startle him and he starts crying. As I get up, I check the baby to make sure he's okay, and what does my older boy do? No, he doesn't ask if his brother is okay... he doesn't ask if Mommy is okay...

    "Mommy, you dropped your banana!" he says. Then he proceeds to run over to the banana. "Are you okay banana?" He then checks it to make sure it's not broken, and puts it back in my purse. "The banana is okay, Mommy."

    Needless to say, I had a hard time controlling my laughter even though I was concerned about the baby.

    And as a final note - the banana is fine, my posterior is growing what I'm sure will be a lovely purple bruise, and the baby felt good enough a few minutes later when I dropped him off at daycare to headbutt me in the teeth without a peep after the fact.

    LMBO!! I literally laughed out loud!!!! I love it!!!
  • laserturkey
    laserturkey Posts: 1,680 Member
    Daughter's first sentence: My mommy good girl nice.
    Son, on the way to tkd class with me: Tough like a trash can, beautiful like a supermodel-- that's Mom.
  • MB_Positif
    MB_Positif Posts: 8,897 Member
    Before my brain surgery my son and I (then 6) talked about how I should be able to do some of the things again that he and I liked to do together from before I was sick like Tennis and Soccer. So he came back with, "Yeah and maybe you'll be able to play football...with big men!" Love that kid.
  • treagal
    treagal Posts: 264 Member
    I was reading my 5 year old son Charlottes Web and at the end of the book I could not stop bawling my eyes out. I was a mess, and was trying really hard to keep reading but I kept crying and crying. Finally my son says "mom, it's just a book". lol, Then I was laughing and crying at the same time.
  • JennytheWicked
    JennytheWicked Posts: 67 Member
    Well he's not my kid, he's my roommates kid. He's 5 and adorable. Well, he heard us saying "C U Next Tuesday" to each other, and now he says that to me every time I leave the house, LOL. I wonder if he'll ever find out what it actually means.

    Mhm... Thanks for that.

    Anyway, some more hilarious quotes from my kid:

    "Why don't any of these people recognize me?!"
    "My butt freaking hurts"
    "I spy with my little eye... umm... trees.." (in a valiant attempt to not go to sleep.)
    "travelin', man. Travelin'." (while on a road trip)
    "mommy, why is **** a bad word?"

    And for those of you that need the awwww moment:

    I ask my son what Love looks like and he said "Your heart, Mommy." /dies
  • capnrus789
    capnrus789 Posts: 2,731 Member
    Van Halen - Panama came on the radio the other day. He pipes up, "Oh yeah! Van Halen! Oh yeah, people!"

    He's only 6. Rock on.
  • EmilyOfTheSun
    EmilyOfTheSun Posts: 1,548 Member
    Well he's not my kid, he's my roommates kid. He's 5 and adorable. Well, he heard us saying "C U Next Tuesday" to each other, and now he says that to me every time I leave the house, LOL. I wonder if he'll ever find out what it actually means.

    Mhm... Thanks for that.

    Anyway, some more hilarious quotes from my kid:

    "Why don't any of these people recognize me?!"
    "My butt freaking hurts"
    "I spy with my little eye... umm... trees.." (in a valiant attempt to not go to sleep.)
    "travelin', man. Travelin'." (while on a road trip)
    "mommy, why is **** a bad word?"

    And for those of you that need the awwww moment:

    I ask my son what Love looks like and he said "Your heart, Mommy." /dies

    Love that little punk. And the fact that we're roomies :D<3

    Oh and another thing he said to me, "Emily, I love you. I'll love you forever!" Melts my freakin heart.
  • JennytheWicked
    JennytheWicked Posts: 67 Member
    Well he's not my kid, he's my roommates kid. He's 5 and adorable. Well, he heard us saying "C U Next Tuesday" to each other, and now he says that to me every time I leave the house, LOL. I wonder if he'll ever find out what it actually means.

    Mhm... Thanks for that.

    Anyway, some more hilarious quotes from my kid:

    "Why don't any of these people recognize me?!"
    "My butt freaking hurts"
    "I spy with my little eye... umm... trees.." (in a valiant attempt to not go to sleep.)
    "travelin', man. Travelin'." (while on a road trip)
    "mommy, why is **** a bad word?"

    And for those of you that need the awwww moment:

    I ask my son what Love looks like and he said "Your heart, Mommy." /dies

    Love that little punk. And the fact that we're roomies :D<3

    Oh and another thing he said to me, "Emily, I love you. I'll love you forever!" Melts my freakin heart.

    yeah, especially mine when he's pulling that crap in about 10 years with all the teenage girls.
  • Juliejustsaying
    Juliejustsaying Posts: 2,332 Member
    My kids are very sweet, they've said the whole you're the smartest, prettiest etc...but this is my favorite...When my youngest son was turning 5 yo I got invitations to his birthday party that had a pic of him, half his face, the other half was spiderman's face. When he saw the invitations he said, "Now I really CAN save the WHOLE world!"

    He's going to be 10 in a week and he still wants to save the whole world...he's planning on moving to Orlando where he can be a power ranger....yeah, he still thinks they are real.
  • Juliejustsaying
    Juliejustsaying Posts: 2,332 Member
    oo here is a recently exchange between my two boys...I'm a bit of a rocker, heavy metal etc...well one of my favorite songs is Scars by Papa Roach...in the middle of the song the lead singer screams "GO FIX YOURSELF"...and in the main body of the lyrics he sings "My weakness is I care too much"...

    so the exchange when like this...

    Oldest: Hey you can't do that (blah blah Minecraft blah blah)
    Youngest: GO FIX YOURSELF
    Oldest: My weakness is I care too much

    I laughed so damn hard....for about 30 minutes...okay, it was funny to me!
  • kmbweber2014
    kmbweber2014 Posts: 680 Member
    My son is seven. A few days ago I was getting ready for work and he said "Mom I don't know why you put on make up, your the most beautiful when you don't have it on." And last night he said "Mom, holy cow you are getting much skinnier. You've never been fat though." He is such a little charmer and I love love love his sweet face.
  • Conversation with my (then) five year old girl:

    "Mommy, what's an ex-boyfriend?"

    "Well honey, that's when you're breaking up with the boy who is your boyfriend. If he's not your boyfriend any more, then he's your EX-boyfriend. Get it?

    "Oh...ok then I have an ex boyfriend now!"

    "Um...no. You're five. You don't have an ex-boyfriend."

    "Do too! Jon-Jon is my ex boyfriend!" (another 5 year old, from her class)

    "Ok, I give - how is Jon-Jon your ex-boyfriend?"

    "Well yesterday I kissed him so he was my boyfriend...but then he ran away screaming, so now he's my EX-boyfriend!"


    I had to pull the car over by that point, because I was laughing too hard to see straight. Little Jon-Jon continued to run away screaming from her well throughout the rest of kindergarden and most of 1st grade.
  • tlmcint
    tlmcint Posts: 74 Member
    my oldest son (23) when he was 2.5, he was watching the movie "Hook". When the mermaids came swimming around he got so excited and said "look Mom Barbiesharks!". cutest thing ever!!!
  • Jersey_Devil
    Jersey_Devil Posts: 4,142 Member
    The other day my kid said "I want to be a pot head!"

    (I was cooking and put a pot on my head to get a laugh.)
  • fivepence
    fivepence Posts: 33 Member
    These are all so lovely :)
  • SweetTea111104
    SweetTea111104 Posts: 338 Member
    My children literally follow me around the house like little ducklings. So one day I was going to the bathroom and my 3 year old son of course followed me in. In frustration I asked him politely. "Can you please give me some privacy?" He politely says "sure mommy". I sat down an smiled about how sweet my son is and not two seconds later he barges in the door...."MOMMY I CAN'T FIND YOUR PRIVACY!" I was so glad I was in the bathroom because I was laughing so hard I would have peed on myself!"
  • UsedToBeHusky
    UsedToBeHusky Posts: 15,229 Member
    <
    The fluff ball figured out how to play 1-sided tug of war.... stand on the towel you are pulling!!! I cried i was laughing so hard! :laugh:

    So cute!
  • cherryd69
    cherryd69 Posts: 340
    Teatime discussion, my 14year old daughter felt argumentative. After some correcting from me an the hubby, she looked at me cool as a cucumber an said 'just remember mother, be nice to me now cause ill be the one paying for and choosing your nursing home'


    Damn near choked on my my tortilla wrap!


    My 3 year old son has a fascination with his 'dinkle' Like all lads.... He followed me into the bathroom, normal toddler style started to ask random questions : 'mummy, you having a wee?' 'mummy, i go for wee too on toilet' so on an so forth.. As i wiped myself and pulled my undies up, he bent forward and shouted 'MUMMY you have no dinkle! mummy, your dinkle fall off!!!'

    que a rather awkward 10 mins of tryin to explain to a rather upset 3yr old why ladies dont have 'dinkles'
  • danasings
    danasings Posts: 8,218 Member
    When my oldest was two, she kept asking me for a "tennis shoe". She had done this 2 or 3 times on the way to day care. I would look at her and I would say "but you're wearing tennis shoes?" And of course, she would get frustrated and would cry. This went on for a couple of weeks. Then, one day, she sneezed really hard and long rivers of snot hung down from each nostril. Then, she cries "Mommy, I need a tennis shoe!"

    I was like... oh.

    :laugh: I have soooooo many of these moments with my two year old son lately.

    The only thing I can think of right now is when I showed my then 3 year old son a photo of my sister when she was about two years old. She is wearing just a diaper in the photo and standing in front of a swimming pool.

    Me: Who is this?
    D: That's PB (his little brother). He has a big head and wants to swim.

    Oh, and the first time D used the word love, he said, "I love cake." Not mommy or daddy, but cake. Yep, that's my boy.
  • danasings
    danasings Posts: 8,218 Member
    Okay, my two year old just opened a cup of yogurt and yelled, "Oh, no! There's a crocodile in it!"

    We just can't make this stuff up, folks. :laugh: