Self Esteem and Personal Image

I used to get really down on myself. I hated myself and thought everyone around me did as well. All of my "friends" had girlfriends and dates in high school, I never did...I even went as the third wheel for my senor prom, because I never asked anyone out for fear of rejection.

Even later in life, I was alone. I was a loser. When I finally found someone to marry me, it was a very short engagement (we met and married within 5 weeks) and I just "knew" she was the one. Well, she was also "the one" to other guys as well while we were married, and to 3 or 4 other husbands after we divorced. Just more stuff to stack on my throne of being King of the Lonely Loser.

Then, one day, I took a good, hard, honest look at myself. I was sitting out somewhere, alone, as I usually do, talking to myself, examining everywhere that I had went wrong in my life and marriage, then it dawned on me...I said to myself:

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I was always afraid of the what-ifs. I was alone because I chose to be alone, not because I would never find anyone. I wasn't even really looking. I would always gravitate toward women that were already in relationships, usually with a friend of mine, and fall secretly in love with them...why? Because it was safer to admire from afar than it was to have them tell me I was "just a friend." I needed to think more highly of myself if I wanted others to think more highly of me. This didn't mean I needed to lose weight to fit in, it means that if I didn't want to lose weight, I just needed to accept that I was who I was, and people either needed to deal with it or I didn't need them. I didn't need them.

I don't care. Three words that made me change my attitude.

You don't like me? I don't care
You think I need to be a certain way to please you? I don't care
You don't want to go out with me? I don't care

Realizing that I make my own path in life and that I didn't need to follow anyone else's path, nor did I care about the path others wanted me to follow, made all the difference.

I am awesome. I have awesome friends, both in real life and on here, and in other forms of social media. I chose them and they chose me. Why? Because we are awesome.

It took a while for me to realize the amount of awesome I am. Am I being narcissistic? Sure..why not? I like me. Even if nobody else does, I. Like. Me.

The kicker is, I have more friends, better friends, more real friends, now that I like me. I'm happier, I have less stress, I have so much less drama in my life because I like me. I can't expect others to like me if I don't like myself. I can't expect others to respect me if I don't respect myself. I'm the only one who has to deal with who I am on the inside, and if I don't like who I am on the inside, it will show on the outside.

I have raised a good son, mostly on my own, because I like me. He's awesome too, by the way...just ask him, he's happy to share how awesome he is.

TL;DR =

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Replies

  • parys1
    parys1 Posts: 2,064 Member
    This is timely.

    And YES, we are awesome!

    :flowerforyou:
  • ILoveTheBrowns
    ILoveTheBrowns Posts: 661 Member
    this should be in a magazine or somethin....well written piece.
  • :heart: This!

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  • Jestinia
    Jestinia Posts: 1,154 Member

    You don't like me? I don't care
    You think I need to be a certain way to please you? I don't care
    You don't want to go out with me? I don't care


    This has been my attitude now for several years. I have to say it's made me even less popular than I was before, but I really don't care. Most people are just out to use each other for something anyway. And therefore I can live without most people. And I do.
  • Factory_Reset
    Factory_Reset Posts: 1,651 Member
    You are awesome, one of the many reasons I like you

    :flowerforyou:
  • MacInCali
    MacInCali Posts: 1,042 Member
    You couldn't have written this at a better time ... thank you for being the awesome person you are!!! :heart:
  • CompressedCarbon
    CompressedCarbon Posts: 353 Member
    :flowerforyou: Awesome.

    Do you think that it takes time to throw off the lies you absorb from others to realize that you are awesome? I ask because for a long while (and I see it in one of my daughters as well), I believed the crap others foisted on me and it wasn't until I quit caring what others thought about me, that I began to appreciate what makes me "me".
  • sfbaumgarten
    sfbaumgarten Posts: 912 Member
    Good for you! More people should learn to love themselves this way!
  • love.
  • _KitKat_
    _KitKat_ Posts: 1,066 Member
    tumblr_ljph1lwDbb1qgsqklo1_500_large.jpg
  • Crescent_Meadows
    Crescent_Meadows Posts: 61 Member
    Thanks for this post! It made me smile and was a reminder to believe in my own beauty :) I love all the AWESOME pictures you guys are posting!
  • Cranquistador
    Cranquistador Posts: 39,744 Member
    emma-stone-says-oh-yea.gif
  • Lennonluv2
    Lennonluv2 Posts: 956 Member
    Wow, good for you! I hope to someday get there myself. Thanks for posting this, it gives me hope. :smile:
  • ssaraj43
    ssaraj43 Posts: 575 Member
    Great post!! In for the AWESOME!! :heart:
  • HiKaren
    HiKaren Posts: 1,306 Member
    turtle.png

    I know you are.... But what am I?
  • janicebinva
    janicebinva Posts: 99 Member
    Great post.
  • RivenV
    RivenV Posts: 1,667 Member
    Sounds like you've really come a long way! Congratulations are in order.

    I don't have any of that, so here's a gif of an otter attacking it's natural foe: a walrus

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  • red_road
    red_road Posts: 761 Member
    true dat

    jennifer-anniston-gif-ya-think.gif
  • WallyH4EverVersion
    WallyH4EverVersion Posts: 172 Member
    Absolutely love your post !! You are awesome!!
  • Keep_The_Laughter
    Keep_The_Laughter Posts: 183 Member
    This thread is awsome, you are awsome and everyone participating in this positivity is awsome :drinker: