my hubby paying me to lose weight

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Replies

  • Jerrypeoples
    Jerrypeoples Posts: 1,541 Member
    Really? First of all, when you're married it should be joint funds. Second, you will need at least that just to buy a new wardrobe.

    Who says it has to be joint funds??? YOU? Who are you??

    My husband and I have our own accounts and a joint account merely for paying household bills. We enjoy being able to solely control the money that we make on our own.

    obviously your marriage is a sham
  • LeslieB042812
    LeslieB042812 Posts: 1,799 Member
    Am I really the only one who finds this creepy?

    no, i agree with you.....it feels really weird to me too, but i guess everyone is different!
  • Greytfish
    Greytfish Posts: 810
    Really? First of all, when you're married it should be joint funds. Second, you will need at least that just to buy a new wardrobe.

    Who says it has to be joint funds??? YOU? Who are you??

    My husband and I have our own accounts and a joint account merely for paying household bills. We enjoy being able to solely control the money that we make on our own.

    It is joint funds, assuming you are lawfully married in the U.S. How you choose to store the funds makes no difference other than geography.
  • Achrya
    Achrya Posts: 16,913 Member
    who in the hell is anyone to judge how to motivate someone. everyone is different in what they respond to. if she feels she will be motivated more to keep on track by a promise her husband made then so be it. and while most marriages the money is equal im getting the feeling the money he pays her is hers to do with as she wishes, not something that they have to sit down and figure out finances to see if it is feasible.

    and for the record, all men pay for sex. just not all transactions are of the monetary persuasion
    umm...NO

    Ummm, yes men do pay for sex. You go out on dates and the man pays, he is paying for what he is going to get at some point later.

    Marriage is the oldest form of prostitution.

    :noway:

    just because he is paying for the meal, does not mean he is paying for sex.
    you do all men a discredit when you make a statement like that.

    When I treat my kids to dairy queen... am I paying them to behave? no - I'm paying for a treat for them to show them that I care for them and am appreciating them right now. I am showing them that I love spending time with them. I'm not buying their affection.

    If I go out on a date, and I pay, I'm not paying for future sex. I'm saying "hey, I like you and I value the time we spend together... here, you take it easy and let me treat". I am assuming that the reverse would be true.

    If sex happens, it's because we both want it. Not because it's an owed responsibility because he 'paid for it'.

    Jeeze.

    If I go on a date and pay I damn well better get some diq. What the hell else am I putting the up with some other person for?
  • Tigg_er
    Tigg_er Posts: 22,001 Member
    My hubby gave me a great incentive to lose weight. He said he would pay me for every pound i lost. 1-10 pounds $10 a pound. 11-20 pounds $15 a pound..21-30 pounds $20 a pound. Anything over 30 pounds $25 a pound. I need to lose 42 pounds. Gained the majority of the weight when i quit smoking. I can do this !!!'
    He knows you better than anyone here, so if that works to keep you in the game, then good luck. Different things inspire people to try to achieve a goal. For some it's money, for some it's new clothes, for some it's being able to physically keep playing sports (me).

    Niner's got it. After I already started adding workouts to my weight loss, my husband said that once I master push-ups, we'd work on chin-ups together. I took it as an "Atta Girl, Go Get It", not as a slight against my commitment or capabilities.

    I agree with Niner also, anything that works and from the way the OP posted she sounds happy about it and thats all that counts.
  • lina1131
    lina1131 Posts: 2,246 Member
    This thread, damn. :laugh:

    I think it's great that your husband is supportive. Good job on the weight loss so far!
  • vals83
    vals83 Posts: 63 Member
    NO!
  • vals83
    vals83 Posts: 63 Member
    Am I really the only one who finds this creepy?

    I agree.

    Totally
  • pineapple1989
    pineapple1989 Posts: 195 Member
    My partner motivates me by supporting me though my bad days and encouragement etc, however each to their own and if it works for you then fair enough.

    I disagree with the points on needing to have joint funds with your partner though, we've lived together for years and all our money is separate apart from household bills, we both prefer it that way, although granted we both work full time so it's simpler now.
  • PaleoPath4Lyfe
    PaleoPath4Lyfe Posts: 3,161 Member
    who in the hell is anyone to judge how to motivate someone. everyone is different in what they respond to. if she feels she will be motivated more to keep on track by a promise her husband made then so be it. and while most marriages the money is equal im getting the feeling the money he pays her is hers to do with as she wishes, not something that they have to sit down and figure out finances to see if it is feasible.

    and for the record, all men pay for sex. just not all transactions are of the monetary persuasion
    umm...NO

    Ummm, yes men do pay for sex. You go out on dates and the man pays, he is paying for what he is going to get at some point later.

    Marriage is the oldest form of prostitution.
    Come, join us in 2014 where women often pay for dates and adding a teabag to hot water doesn't change the water's chemistry.

    I pay for dates in my household and don't hold the belief that his money is our money and my money is our money. His money is HIS. My money is MINE.

    We both contribute to our household.

    It still doesn't take away from the fact that Marriage is the oldest and only legal form of prostitution.
  • PaleoPath4Lyfe
    PaleoPath4Lyfe Posts: 3,161 Member
    Really? First of all, when you're married it should be joint funds. Second, you will need at least that just to buy a new wardrobe.

    Who says it has to be joint funds??? YOU? Who are you??

    My husband and I have our own accounts and a joint account merely for paying household bills. We enjoy being able to solely control the money that we make on our own.

    obviously your marriage is a sham

    Obviously we have been oblivious for the last 20 years. Hmmm.
  • sloth3toes
    sloth3toes Posts: 2,212 Member
    I want a sexy older lady to pay me to gain muscle:)

    Perhaps a slightly different twist on 'Adopt-a-Noob?'
  • PaleoPath4Lyfe
    PaleoPath4Lyfe Posts: 3,161 Member
    Really? First of all, when you're married it should be joint funds. Second, you will need at least that just to buy a new wardrobe.

    Who says it has to be joint funds??? YOU? Who are you??

    My husband and I have our own accounts and a joint account merely for paying household bills. We enjoy being able to solely control the money that we make on our own.

    It is joint funds, assuming you are lawfully married in the U.S. How you choose to store the funds makes no difference other than geography.

    Sorry, but that differs depending on what State you reside in.

    Just because 2 people are married doesn't mean what is his is also mine. That is so wrong. I can't believe the selfishness I am reading in this thread.

    If we were to divorce today, I would not ask him for a dime of what is in his account. That is his business and his alone.

    The only thing we have set up is the beneficiary if the other should pass away. Then the other person gets ownership of that account.
  • Greytfish
    Greytfish Posts: 810
    I want a sexy older lady to pay me to gain muscle:)

    Perhaps a slightly different twist on 'Adopt-a-Noob?'

    :laugh:
  • GothicaAdore
    GothicaAdore Posts: 82 Member
    Am I really the only one who finds this creepy?

    Seconded.
  • AusEliza
    AusEliza Posts: 60 Member
    I was quite overweight when I was young and my Dad use the money trick as a extrensic motivater for me to lose weight. It would have worked apart from the fact I used the money I made to buy junk food after school :O
  • emxp75
    emxp75 Posts: 5
    No, you're not!
  • IMYarnCraz33
    IMYarnCraz33 Posts: 1,016 Member
    Nope you're not the only one to find it a little odd.
    Is the incentive just so he can help his wife or is it a selfish thing on his part because he doesn't like the fact she's gained some weight.
  • I've heard about this before, usually a £1 or $1 for every lb. I read a story not to long ago, where the husband had paid her £1 for every lb, bought her new clothes, and then when she'd lost 9st, he bought her a ring with 9 diamonds in it. To me, that was just his way of supporting and encouraging her, and showing how proud he was of her achievement. :flowerforyou:

    I don't think it's creepy if a spouse/parent/relative knows the person is struggling to lose weight and is offering an incentive to the "loser". I think the OP will recieve around $750 if she were to lose all her weight, is that not just his way of maybe offering her money to buy new clothes, etc.. with the added incentive?