Corrupt a Wish

Granted. You win the Lotto. But, this particular Lotto was designed by Shirley Jackson. So, I hope your dodgeball skills are up to par.

I wish it wasn't cloudy today.

granted but the same night, thieves break into your house and steal it all. Also, your family doesnt want to do anything with you because they think you are making it all up as you dont want to share your newly acquired wealth with them.

granted but since there is no rain, crops die and prices go up!

i wish i would never get fat again

Granted - you now have a genetic mutation that stops you from storing fat. Unfortunately, the planet is gripped by a huge famine, and you are the first to die because you have no fat stores to sustain you.

I wish I had my mum's recipe for scones.

Granted. You are now cat-tired. SO you continually stretch, yawn, curl up in a ball, and get nothing done except harck up some hair balls.

I wish laundry did itself.

I wish laundry did itself.

Check that out! Your clothes just washed, dried and tried to fold/hang themselves...and crumpled to the floor instead of your dresser/closet. Oopsie!

I still wish I weren't exhausted with a ton of things to do.

I just give in....

I wish I would stop posting comments to the wrong person

Granted, but you end up in ER from unrelated complications.

I wish I could get an appetite to eat dinner so I have the energy to run tonight.

I wish I could get an appetite to eat dinner so I have the energy to run tonight.

Granted! Now you're really hungry, and gonna have to run all over the world to balance out the cals you end up eating. Enjoy your trip!

I wish college experiences only included facts that I'd use in my calling, not years of garbage like war stories in History.

Granted! Now you can't escape school due to being a professional student.

I wish I had money for a culinary travel tour.

Granted but it's your last meal.


I wish it were already October.

Granted. You now have a professional chef. Unfortunately he's a total food snob and rolls his eyes every time you ask him to cook normal dishes, and he acts like the dying swan when you put ketchup on your meal, and he refuses to do your steak the way you like it, it has to be done the way he thinks that kind of steak should be done. And you get so sick of his attitude that you fire him and go back to cooking your own food.

I wish I could make a fly on the wall documentary about the lives of neanderthals.

Granted but a disgruntled employee jacks off on your meal..... Enjoy


I wish my car got a hundred miles a gallon.