Comment from my mother...what do YOU think!?

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Replies

  • FatFreeFrolicking
    FatFreeFrolicking Posts: 4,252 Member
    randomtai wrote: »
    You don' t wanna hear your mom's mouth about things? Move out. Simple.

    Aw, you are so bitter. God bless you.

  • randomtai
    randomtai Posts: 9,003 Member
    randomtai wrote: »
    You don' t wanna hear your mom's mouth about things? Move out. Simple.

    Aw, you are so bitter. God bless you.


    Yeah that's exactly it.
  • FabulousFantasticFifty
    FabulousFantasticFifty Posts: 195,833 Member
    You did what your heart told you to do and helped someone in need. Never have regrets about that! If you feel that your family is totally fine and your Parents, knowing that you have a part time job and make a little extra money on the side aren't asking or expecting you to pitch in at home, then they have no reason to be upset with you! As a parent myself, I am very proud of your kind heart and generosity! God Bless you Sweetheart for thinking of other's needs before your own. Don't dwell on this dispute with your Mama, she'll get over it and recognize how Blessed and Proud she is to have such an amazing, compassionate child. :smile:
  • delaney056
    delaney056 Posts: 475
    edited October 2014
    randomtai wrote: »
    randomtai wrote: »
    You don' t wanna hear your mom's mouth about things? Move out. Simple.

    Aw, you are so bitter. God bless you.


    Yeah that's exactly it.

    In reference to one of your earlier posts randomtai, I am certain there's a LOT more wrong with society than a 19 year old full time college student who works part time and gave $100 to a lady to help her.

    Do not patronize me. To say that my actions are what is wrong with society (another reference to your earlier post) is absolutely ludicrous. I'm a young adult trying to find my way in the world and do what is right. You are pretty much the only one who has had very little, if anything, constructive to say. I am seeking advice, not to be belittled.
  • randomtai
    randomtai Posts: 9,003 Member
    delaney056 wrote: »
    randomtai wrote: »
    randomtai wrote: »
    You don' t wanna hear your mom's mouth about things? Move out. Simple.

    Aw, you are so bitter. God bless you.


    Yeah that's exactly it.

    In reference to one of your earlier posts randomtai, I am certain there's a LOT more wrong with society than a 19 year old full time college student who works part time and gave $100 to a lady to help her.


    Yup. DO whatever makes you happy. :flowerforyou:
  • FabulousFantasticFifty
    FabulousFantasticFifty Posts: 195,833 Member
    You did what your heart told you to do and helped someone in need. Never have regrets about that! If you feel that your family is totally fine and your Parents, knowing that you have a part time job and make a little extra money on the side aren't asking or expecting you to pitch in at home, then they have no reason to be upset with you! As a parent myself, I am very proud of your kind heart and generosity! God Bless you Sweetheart for thinking of other's needs before your own. Don't dwell on this dispute with your Mama, she'll get over it and recognize how Blessed and Proud she is to have such an amazing, compassionate child. :smile:
  • djcangel
    djcangel Posts: 800 Member
    Seriously...You are an angel...do not even consider all of the negative feed back...You did good!!!
  • fobs13
    fobs13 Posts: 1,080 Member
    I am a little surprised you mom's friend took the money from you. Could not imagine taking the equivalent of $100 from one of my kids friends when they are older even if in difficulty. You however have nothing to be ashamed of. You saw someone in need and offered help. If my daughter did that would he happy as long as I didn't feel the friend had taken advantage of a much younger person.
  • snowflake954
    snowflake954 Posts: 8,400 Member
    Being a mother of 3 grown sons, I can tell you that maybe your mom was having a bad day. Her response might not have had to do with what you told her, but a string of other stresses. Another thought here is that, perhaps your mom knows something about your friends mother that she isn't telling you. She might think that this woman does not deserve your generosity, and you don't know the whole story. As for your living at home---if your mother is disabled, this may be a godsend for her. I assume she needs help. You sound like a good daughter, and I'm sure she is proud of you. When there's a calm moment, do talk to her and try to find out why she reacted that way. Best of luck to you. :)
  • 21million
    21million Posts: 113 Member
    In.
  • farmgirlrrt
    farmgirlrrt Posts: 168 Member
    In the future if you are going to help someone else and your only contribution to your family's finances is paying for your OWN gas then I would recommend not telling your family that you helped someone else out with their finances.
  • delaney056
    delaney056 Posts: 475
    edited October 2014
    In the future if you are going to help someone else and your only contribution to your family's finances is paying for your OWN gas then I would recommend not telling your family that you helped someone else out with their finances.

    Did you read the part where I said I've offered to help her more and she has refused my offers or did you just comment without reading anything?
  • Kevalicious99
    Kevalicious99 Posts: 1,131 Member
    Last I looked it was 100% ok for you to spend your money on whatever you like ... sorry Mom failure here.
  • Phaedra2014
    Phaedra2014 Posts: 1,254 Member
    You are a sweet and nurturing person. The world needs more compassionate people like you.
  • Mariachicat
    Mariachicat Posts: 311 Member
    Unless you pay your mother rent, and even if you do, why don't you keep your discretionary spending choices to yourself. Your mother probably feels like you're ungrateful and squandering your household's resources. Some people feel like it's a dog eat dog world out there especially if they try hard and make sacrifices to stay within budget. If you want to be generous with people who aren't family and your mother has no personal investment in, maybe don't advertise it to her as long as you are living under her roof, IMHO. Otherwise, do as your conscience leads you.
  • hbrittingham
    hbrittingham Posts: 2,518 Member
    randomtai wrote: »
    I don't know, I'm not sure if it's normal for a 19 year old college student to have to start paying rent to her family already. I mean, if she graduated and had to live at home for a while, that would make sense, but at 19, you're just getting started in life, and still dealing with education/paying student bills/etc. It would seem kind of harsh to me to ask a 19 year old to pay rent if she wants to keep living at home during uni. Also, it sounds like OP is already pretty independent -- as long as it was her money she was giving, I don't see how the mother's comment was in any way justified.

    19 is an adult. This is what is wrong with society now a days.

    Really? I am 47 and when I was in high school, my parents gave me the same offer they gave my siblings. If I went to college, they would pay for it and I could live at home until graduation. If I didn't, I would have to get out at 18 (or graduation from high school) and make my own way. I chose door number 2. I never got a college education. I have become successful, but it probably took me a lot longer than it had if I had gone with option #1.

    A 19 year old who is on the college track and living at home is NOT what's wrong with society now a days.

  • lynn1982
    lynn1982 Posts: 1,439 Member
    First, I just want to say that what you did was kind, generous, and this world needs more people like you.

    In terms of your mom's comment - could there be something behind her words? Maybe financial struggles that you don't know about? (I'm not judging or anything - I'm just saying, maybe there's something you don't know about?)

    I remember when I was 19 and was working full time over the summer in order to pay for school in the fall. I worked part time on top of that and paid for my own car and chipped in for groceries at home (I lived with my dad at the time). Outside of the train station near the office where I worked, there was a man who sat every day and begged for money along with his dog. My heart went out to him and the dog, so I used to give him a couple dollars whenever I walked by. I told my dad once that I had done that and his response was "who is going to give you money?" In his mind, I was working hard for money to pay for school, etc. and should keep that money. I still don't think it's the right mindset, but in his mind, I had worked hard for it and deserved it. It's not quite the same as your situation, but he really meant well... Maybe your mom is thinking something along the same lines?
  • Deborah105 wrote: »
    I'd be proud to be your momma. What a lovely and selfless thing to do. <3

    I agree. I taught my daughter to think of others. I have had to bite my tongue sometimes, but she does think of other people and blesses them as you have done. I also bite my tongue when my mom says things too… she doesn't understand why I tithe and give to my church. She has no idea about my other charity works… You are a good girl. The burden of caring for your mom isn't yours unless you make it as such. The Bible says the parents are to take care of their children, not the other way around.

    Don't take it out of context. I'm not saying we don't care about out parents who need help. I'm saying that this young woman who helped a friend in need did good. My daughter would do the same.