Telling people to "smile."
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shrinkingletters wrote: »Honestly, if your reaction to a complete stranger being upset by your request to appear more pleasant for you is "they're being too uptight/too sensitive", then you don't understand the basics of interacting with full-fledged human people who happen to have thoughts and emotions and lives that you're not aware of. Also really, really self-centered.
Ya maybe people just shouldn't say anything to anybody,, they could just look at each other and grunt !
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shrinkingletters wrote: »Honestly, if your reaction to a complete stranger being upset by your request to appear more pleasant for you is "they're being too uptight/too sensitive", then you don't understand the basics of interacting with full-fledged human people who happen to have thoughts and emotions and lives that you're not aware of. Also really, really self-centered.
Ya maybe people just shouldn't say anything to anybody,, they could just look at each other and grunt !
Better yet, just leave strangers going about their day-to-day alone? Leave the chit-chat to bars, restaurants, dates, work....0 -
shrinkingletters wrote: »Honestly, if your reaction to a complete stranger being upset by your request to appear more pleasant for you is "they're being too uptight/too sensitive", then you don't understand the basics of interacting with full-fledged human people who happen to have thoughts and emotions and lives that you're not aware of. Also really, really self-centered.
Ya maybe people just shouldn't say anything to anybody,, they could just look at each other and grunt !
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MonsoonStorm wrote: »They are just trying to be friendly and break the ice.
Don't overanalyse things.
I think that concept is a little to hard for some people to understand. lol
Because introducing yourself is so 20th century.
Then maybe the person may think your a pervert or something,,,or you want to get them in bed ,,,or you want to rob them ,, or you want to run their life,or steal their camera or hell pick anything out.
Then why not just say "Hi!" or "Good Morning!"
I don't really understand what's so hard about breaking the ice by just a simple greeting. It's always worked for me.
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shrinkingletters wrote: »shrinkingletters wrote: »Honestly, if your reaction to a complete stranger being upset by your request to appear more pleasant for you is "they're being too uptight/too sensitive", then you don't understand the basics of interacting with full-fledged human people who happen to have thoughts and emotions and lives that you're not aware of. Also really, really self-centered.
Ya maybe people just shouldn't say anything to anybody,, they could just look at each other and grunt !
Better yet, just leave strangers going about their day-to-day alone? Leave the chit-chat to bars, restaurants, dates, work....
Yup thats some real creative Human interacting right there
Look I'm smiling and you didn't even have to ask
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MonsoonStorm wrote: »They are just trying to be friendly and break the ice.
Don't overanalyse things.
I think that concept is a little to hard for some people to understand. lol
Because introducing yourself is so 20th century.
Then maybe the person may think your a pervert or something,,,or you want to get them in bed ,,,or you want to rob them ,, or you want to run their life,or steal their camera or hell pick anything out.
Then why not just say "Hi!" or "Good Morning!"
I don't really understand what's so hard about breaking the ice by just a simple greeting. It's always worked for me.
Its not that hard at all,,a lot of people do just that , The point is a lot of people use that as a hi or a good morning,, they don't mean anything derogatory or mean spirited at all , I dunno maybe I'm just to old to understand .
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shrinkingletters wrote: »shrinkingletters wrote: »Honestly, if your reaction to a complete stranger being upset by your request to appear more pleasant for you is "they're being too uptight/too sensitive", then you don't understand the basics of interacting with full-fledged human people who happen to have thoughts and emotions and lives that you're not aware of. Also really, really self-centered.
Ya maybe people just shouldn't say anything to anybody,, they could just look at each other and grunt !
Better yet, just leave strangers going about their day-to-day alone? Leave the chit-chat to bars, restaurants, dates, work....
Yup thats some real creative Human interacting right there
Look I'm smiling and you didn't even have to ask
I guess I'm just crazy with the understanding that people aren't obligated to interact with me. *shrugs*0 -
shrinkingletters wrote: »Honestly, if your reaction to a complete stranger being upset by your request to appear more pleasant for you is "they're being too uptight/too sensitive", then you don't understand the basics of interacting with full-fledged human people who happen to have thoughts and emotions and lives that you're not aware of. Also really, really self-centered.
Ya maybe people just shouldn't say anything to anybody,, they could just look at each other and grunt !
So that makes them not so full fledged Human being ?0 -
shrinkingletters wrote: »shrinkingletters wrote: »shrinkingletters wrote: »Honestly, if your reaction to a complete stranger being upset by your request to appear more pleasant for you is "they're being too uptight/too sensitive", then you don't understand the basics of interacting with full-fledged human people who happen to have thoughts and emotions and lives that you're not aware of. Also really, really self-centered.
Ya maybe people just shouldn't say anything to anybody,, they could just look at each other and grunt !
Better yet, just leave strangers going about their day-to-day alone? Leave the chit-chat to bars, restaurants, dates, work....
Yup thats some real creative Human interacting right there
Look I'm smiling and you didn't even have to ask
I guess I'm just crazy with the understanding that people aren't obligated to interact with me. *shrugs*
No you ain't crazy at all,,,, Maybe I'm just to friendly .0 -
shrinkingletters wrote: »Honestly, if your reaction to a complete stranger being upset by your request to appear more pleasant for you is "they're being too uptight/too sensitive", then you don't understand the basics of interacting with full-fledged human people who happen to have thoughts and emotions and lives that you're not aware of. Also really, really self-centered.
Ya maybe people just shouldn't say anything to anybody,, they could just look at each other and grunt !
So that makes them not so full fledged Human being ?
I've seriously never argued this hard to convince complete strangers that they react pleasantly to my completely unsolicited commentary about their face.0 -
I'll say that over the years I have learned to stay away from the unhappy people and to be friendly to the happy people. Unfortunately, there are people that think it is fun to irritate people or to pretend they are being friendly when they are really being rude.0
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460mustang wrote: »I'll say that over the years I have learned to stay away from the unhappy people and to be friendly to the happy people. Unfortunately, there are people that think it is fun to irritate people or to pretend they are being friendly when they are really being rude.
You know unfortunately that is true. And that probably the part I'm missing.
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Women don't really tell me to smile, but men on the street will. It gets so annoying. I smile for a living (I'm a performer), I smile when I'm happy. But I don't just go walking down the street constantly smiling for other people's entertainment/happiness.0
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If you want to see me smile, tell a good joke or say something pleasant.0
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MonsoonStorm wrote: »UltimateRBF wrote: »<---observe my username. I have RBF and I don't appreciate people telling me what to do.
Additionally, I find the "smile!" thing doubly offensive because sometimes people have a legit reason to not be smiling. Depression, hard times and stress are real things, yo. Simply plastering a fake smile on your face and pretending like things are OK is not good, at all.
There's no need to...
Shrug, say "yeah" and they will get the message.
Perhaps it's a cultural thing. As a Brit the "smile" thing is incredibly common and carries no weight or meaning. Sometimes the acknowledgement that somebody notices your pain/misery is actually reassuring when you're depressed. Sometimes it is used out of genuine interest.
"Have a nice day" on the other hand annoys the heck out of me. I find it fake, meaningless and forced. But then, like I said, I'm a miserable Brit. So I ignore it and chalk it down to a cultural quirk.
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People have been telling me this all of my life. It annoys the hell out of me and I want to smack anyone who says this to me!!! If I don't want to smile that's my own business.0
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I used to have a guy at work tell me this often as I passed. And have had it many more times. People, if you do this, please stop. It's really annoying and disrespectful. You don't know what this persons day/life is like and have no right to ask total strangers to do things just because it makes you feel better. There's no excuse for it - just don't do it!0
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I'd probably blow it off because it's not that big of a deal, it's probably someone's misguided attempt to be friendly.
But here's the thing: Sometimes it IS that serious. And I don't feel obligated to wear a smile I don't feel just make strangers more comfortable.0 -
When I was younger, I used to get this all the time from strangers passing me on the street (I'm a woman), and so did all of my women friends. I think of it as somewhere on a continuum with other kinds of street harassment that men do to women; usually it would be, "Smile! You'll look prettier," or "Hey, baby, how 'bout a smile?" or some of the comments others have posted here. (And then if I didn't respond like I was thrilled to smile for them, I'd hear them mutter, "*kitten*!") It wasn't a greeting; it was more like, "You're a woman out in public, which means I have a right to treat you like you're available or here for my benefit somehow." I think that, if you see someone on the street and are in a friendly mood, it's fine to say hi as you pass by. But the smile thing was just creepy; aside from the obvious rudeness, it almost always felt like it was just a few steps away from, "Nice tits!" or "I'd like to eat your *kitten*." There was a lot of that, too. This is an aspect of being young that I really do not miss.0
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I haven't read the thread so forgive me if this has been covered.
Only men say this. And they only say it to women.
No only men don't say this, And the majority of the time I have said it to other guys,, maybe its just the Business I'm in. Its said all the time. I just must be weird ,
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