Sick of hating what I see

I have had this app for a long time now, and have gone from using it to not, but I always lose motivation somehow. But I'm sick of looking in the mirror and hating what I see, plus I want my boyfriend to still think I'm attravtive as I have gained around 10 pounds since we started dating (3 years ago) does anyone have any tips on how to stay motivated? That's always been my problem and I don't know how to change it.
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Replies

  • arditarose
    arditarose Posts: 15,575 Member
    Well what makes you lose motivation? To me, seeing that first pound or two pounds in a week or two weeks time is enough motivation. I think I've logged about every day for almost 500 days. At this point it's second nature.
  • I think it's because I've always had trouble actually losing weight. I usually just gain muscle which does tone my body, but it makes me heavier since muscle weighs more than fat so I get even more depressed.
  • slinke2014
    slinke2014 Posts: 149 Member
    You just have to make yourself do it long enough til it becomes habit. I don't think there are any tips for real motiviation. You are either ready to do it or you are not. I do know that it has been better for me to lose weight because of my health and wellbeing rather than how I look in the mirror. Both me and my fiance gained about 30 pounds over the course of our relationship. We still loved eachother the same but noticed that we just didn't feel good physically. My joints would hurt and my feet hurt all the time. We wanted to live long happy and healthy lives together so we started out slow. Got a fit bit and just tried to walk more which eventually led to this app for me, so I could take better care of myself.

    You have to hav patience and love for your body and it will do what you need it to. Our bodies are amazing tools and we have to treat them well. I have lost about 30 pounds over the last year or so just taking it day by day. Some times you gain, sometimes you lose, sometimes you stay the same. You just have to breath and ride it out sometimes.
  • arditarose
    arditarose Posts: 15,575 Member
    I think it's because I've always had trouble actually losing weight. I usually just gain muscle which does tone my body, but it makes me heavier since muscle weighs more than fat so I get even more depressed.

    Gaining muscle is difficult. I'm in the process of doing so and eating at a SURPLUS while running a heavy lifting program, and even then...I don't plan on gaining more than 3-4 pounds of muscle, and 6+ pounds of fat.

    Anyway, if you use this app and truly eat at a deficit...you will lose fat.
  • zoeysasha37
    zoeysasha37 Posts: 7,089 Member
    arditarose wrote: »
    I think it's because I've always had trouble actually losing weight. I usually just gain muscle which does tone my body, but it makes me heavier since muscle weighs more than fat so I get even more depressed.

    Gaining muscle is difficult. I'm in the process of doing so and eating at a SURPLUS while running a heavy lifting program, and even then...I don't plan on gaining more than 3-4 pounds of muscle, and 6+ pounds of fat.

    Anyway, if you use this app and truly eat at a deficit...you will lose fat.
    This ! For a female eating at a deficit , it would be extremely hard to gain muscle. I eat at a surplus and lift heavy and barely gain muscle.

    If youd like to lose weight, all you need is a calorie deficit. Eat less then you burn and you'll lose weight. Eat a wide variety, well rounded diet for overall health.

  • skinnyinnotime
    skinnyinnotime Posts: 4,141 Member
    I don't see how you just end up gaining muscle whilst trying to lose weight...most likely is that you've shed some fat so your muscle is more visible.

    Motivation ultimately comes from within yourself, you have to need it enough to keep going. People can offer tips and ideas, but it's you who decides what to do.
  • Kimegatron
    Kimegatron Posts: 772 Member
    Man, I wish I could gain muscle, but working out is not for me. At least not yet. I mean, before, losing weight was not for me because I was personally too lazy to figure out how to do it well. Maybe one day! Are your clothes fitting better, though, OP?
  • loulamb7
    loulamb7 Posts: 801 Member
    I think it's because I've always had trouble actually losing weight. I usually just gain muscle which does tone my body, but it makes me heavier since muscle weighs more than fat so I get even more depressed.

    All you need to lose weight is to eat at a caloric deficit. This will not make you gain muscle. Get your caloric intake right first before adding workouts. Good luck.
  • kshama2001
    kshama2001 Posts: 27,843 Member
    I have had this app for a long time now, and have gone from using it to not, but I always lose motivation somehow. But I'm sick of looking in the mirror and hating what I see, plus I want my boyfriend to still think I'm attravtive as I have gained around 10 pounds since we started dating (3 years ago) does anyone have any tips on how to stay motivated? That's always been my problem and I don't know how to change it.

    If you see yourself marrying this guy someday, how's the thought of wedding pictures as a motivation?
  • OldAssDude
    OldAssDude Posts: 1,436 Member
    I have had this app for a long time now, and have gone from using it to not, but I always lose motivation somehow. But I'm sick of looking in the mirror and hating what I see, plus I want my boyfriend to still think I'm attravtive as I have gained around 10 pounds since we started dating (3 years ago) does anyone have any tips on how to stay motivated? That's always been my problem and I don't know how to change it.

    Maybe you are losing motivation because you are doing it for your boyfriend and not yourself.

    My tip to you is to do it for yourself and your own health. If that is you in your picture then you are already attractive, and if your boyfriend really loves you he will find you attractive no matter what.

    I have been married for over 30 years and my wife hates me the same as she always has... :)
  • cnbbnc
    cnbbnc Posts: 1,267 Member
    I think you initially have to find the determination to get it done. Then...once you start making progress, along comes the motivation to see it through. It always sucks getting started. You just have to make up your mind to do it.
  • BuerreNoisette
    BuerreNoisette Posts: 16 Member
    I've also used this app on and off. This is the first go at it where I've searched and added friends. Looking at my feed a few times a day helps really keep me motivated. I get inspired by all the people working out. Sometimes I look at peoples food diaries for inspiration. It also helps to have people commenting on your hard work and it's nice to be able to cry out for help a little and have a network there to keep you going.

  • McChunkchunk
    McChunkchunk Posts: 1 Member
    thorsmom01 wrote: »
    arditarose wrote: »
    I think it's because I've always had trouble actually losing weight. I usually just gain muscle which does tone my body, but it makes me heavier since muscle weighs more than fat so I get even more depressed.

    Gaining muscle is difficult. I'm in the process of doing so and eating at a SURPLUS while running a heavy lifting program, and even then...I don't plan on gaining more than 3-4 pounds of muscle, and 6+ pounds of fat.

    Anyway, if you use this app and truly eat at a deficit...you will lose fat.
    This ! For a female eating at a deficit , it would be extremely hard to gain muscle. I eat at a surplus and lift heavy and barely gain muscle.

    If youd like to lose weight, all you need is a calorie deficit. Eat less then you burn and you'll lose weight. Eat a wide variety, well rounded diet for overall health.

    Is it possible to lose fat with cardio but build muscle, mainly lower body muscle
  • Protranser
    Protranser Posts: 517 Member
    edited December 2015
    thorsmom01 wrote: »
    arditarose wrote: »
    I think it's because I've always had trouble actually losing weight. I usually just gain muscle which does tone my body, but it makes me heavier since muscle weighs more than fat so I get even more depressed.

    Gaining muscle is difficult. I'm in the process of doing so and eating at a SURPLUS while running a heavy lifting program, and even then...I don't plan on gaining more than 3-4 pounds of muscle, and 6+ pounds of fat.

    Anyway, if you use this app and truly eat at a deficit...you will lose fat.
    This ! For a female eating at a deficit , it would be extremely hard to gain muscle. I eat at a surplus and lift heavy and barely gain muscle.

    If youd like to lose weight, all you need is a calorie deficit. Eat less then you burn and you'll lose weight. Eat a wide variety, well rounded diet for overall health.

    Is it possible to lose fat with cardio but build muscle, mainly lower body muscle

    You can lose fat without cardio.
    You need resistance training to build strength

    The first three posts in the following link will get you started
    http://community.myfitnesspal.com/en/discussion/10300319/most-helpful-posts-general-diet-and-weight-loss-help-must-reads#latest
  • middlehaitch
    middlehaitch Posts: 8,481 Member
    It is a personal thing motivation.
    I saw a picture of myself that I disliked so much I started counting calories and losing right away. I never want to look like that so I keep the weight off.
    Set yourself up on MFP to lose .5-2 lb a week and use a food scale to weigh your food.
    Eating in a deficit will prevent muscle growth, but continuing exercise while losing is good for your health.

    Find your motivation and then just stick with it. Motivation is fleeting.

    Cheers, h.

  • jacklifts
    jacklifts Posts: 396 Member
    arditarose wrote: »
    I think I've logged about every day for almost 500 days

    horry shrit - now that's some dedication. wish i could rep you ! I went about 150 days before I lost it.

  • arditarose
    arditarose Posts: 15,575 Member
    jacklifts wrote: »
    arditarose wrote: »
    I think I've logged about every day for almost 500 days

    horry shrit - now that's some dedication. wish i could rep you ! I went about 150 days before I lost it.

    There's people on here with many more days than that logged! To me it seems like nothing.
  • PinkPixiexox
    PinkPixiexox Posts: 4,142 Member
    I have had this app for a long time now, and have gone from using it to not, but I always lose motivation somehow. But I'm sick of looking in the mirror and hating what I see, plus I want my boyfriend to still think I'm attravtive as I have gained around 10 pounds since we started dating (3 years ago) does anyone have any tips on how to stay motivated? That's always been my problem and I don't know how to change it.

    OP - weight will fluctuate. You'll go up, you'll go down. You'll have days where you think "Ugh!" and you'll have days where you think "I look GOOD!". You're human. You're beautiful - 10 pounds on or 10 pounds off.
  • callsitlikeiseeit
    callsitlikeiseeit Posts: 8,627 Member
    arditarose wrote: »
    jacklifts wrote: »
    arditarose wrote: »
    I think I've logged about every day for almost 500 days

    horry shrit - now that's some dedication. wish i could rep you ! I went about 150 days before I lost it.

    There's people on here with many more days than that logged! To me it seems like nothing.

    i have friends on here with days in the THOUSANDS. makes my 350 some odd days seem insignificant ;)
  • Psychgrrl
    Psychgrrl Posts: 3,177 Member
    I think it's because I've always had trouble actually losing weight. I usually just gain muscle which does tone my body, but it makes me heavier since muscle weighs more than fat so I get even more depressed.

    Muscle doesn't weigh more than fat. A pound of muscle and a pound of fat both weigh the same--a pound. A pound of muscle takes up less space than a pound of fat, so in the same physical space you can have more muscle tissue than fat and it will weigh more because there will be more of it.

    If you can build muscle--that's a great sign of health. Take measurements as well. Don't be so tied to a number on a scale. You're worth a lot more than that. :blush: