Do we eat to hurt ourselves?

PamelaR64
PamelaR64 Posts: 10 Member
During a recent emotional binge, I wondered if I was eating to hurt myself. Women who hurt/self-injure themselves seem to have many of the same reasons/causes those of us who binge or emotionally eat do. I have an appointment with my therapist today and I plan to ask him his opinion...
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Replies

  • melipon2166
    melipon2166 Posts: 32 Member
    Great question. I never thought of it as hurting myself but just not caring about myself. I can see how they can be the same. Let me know what your therapist says.
  • dgbah
    dgbah Posts: 1 Member
    Put it down and walk away. You deserve better!
  • becaholic
    becaholic Posts: 21 Member
    I always ask myself, "Why don't I love myself?". If I really cared about myself I wouldn't eat until my stomach hurts and still continue to pig out.
  • pinkyslippers
    pinkyslippers Posts: 188 Member
    kae612 wrote: »
    Yes, that's how I started to think of it. As punishment. I'm looking for an excuse to be angry with myself, to hate myself (because I already am/do), so when I eat excessively I give myself one.

    I agree so much with this. There is always an element of capitulation when I binge, it’s me giving up on myself. It is a form of self-harm. None of us would ever treat another person this way...

  • xionax
    xionax Posts: 19 Member
    That's a good question to ask for more info! I eat to punish my body so I would say yes, I also self harm all due to ill health. I go into a difference zone were I have know control. I'll never understand me & food!
  • sebedina
    sebedina Posts: 160 Member
    Yes it definitely feels like self harm. I wake up the next day in despair, not knowing what to do... but I think it isn't always simply about greed.... white flour is highly addictive, so I am going to avoid this and see if it helps
  • 303lissy
    303lissy Posts: 427 Member
    mkellam wrote: »
    For me it's not quite self-harm but more an act of rebellion. I'm stressed out trying to fulfill many obligations, trying to be a "good person," a "responsible person," and letting my perfectionist streak call the shots? Yea, something breaks eventually and it's like I suddenly view healthy eating as another obligation and I buck it HARD out of some bizarre act of reclaiming my choices. It feels like I'm rebelling or liberating in the moment, but then later I just feel gross bc often I get a sugar crash or didn't even enjoy the actual food. I've been working on relaxing and saying no more often and it has helped with this urge but it still crops up. Does this make any sort of sense?

    Wow. I never would have thought of it that way but it seriously feels like you crawled inside my brain and formed my jumbled thoughts into a coherent sentence that I wouldn't have been able to say. This is exactly it. I'm not a rebellious person by nature, so I don't want to "hurt" anyone else with any act of rebellion, but hurting myself doesn't count.
  • Debbborra
    Debbborra Posts: 4 Member
    edited May 2018
    I always feel that there's a point where eating crosses over from simply out of control to deliberately (not exactly deliberate but subconsciously deliberate) self destruction. It almost feels like a punishment sometimes. But it's not that simple. Sometimes it feels like a lifeline or tbe only available comfort. If it always felt bad it would be easier to stop.
  • MermaidSparkle12
    MermaidSparkle12 Posts: 1 Member
    mkellam wrote: »
    For me it's not quite self-harm but more an act of rebellion. I'm stressed out trying to fulfill many obligations, trying to be a "good person," a "responsible person," and letting my perfectionist streak call the shots? Yea, something breaks eventually and it's like I suddenly view healthy eating as another obligation and I buck it HARD out of some bizarre act of reclaiming my choices. It feels like I'm rebelling or liberating in the moment, but then later I just feel gross bc often I get a sugar crash or didn't even enjoy the actual food. I've been working on relaxing and saying no more often and it has helped with this urge but it still crops up. Does this make any sort of sense?


    YES!
    Totally this. I think growing up very religiously and restrictively, having a dairy intolerance and having healthy heating shoved on me heavily by my mother and watched all the time all feeds into my rebelliousness and self destruction.
    27, still living at home with my parents and my partner.....and sometimes eating what I want is the only thing I can control, and only when nobody else is around.
    How messed up is that?!

    I was also talking to my psychologist about why I eat tons of dairy at the moment in a self destructive manner.
    I used to think it was self protection....like, if I get fat and unattractive means men won’t abuse me ever again....
    BUT.
    Possibly, it may be that I am SO certain that my partner will cheat or leave me one day, that in a really messed up way I’m taking control of the situation by making myself unattractive so that if/when he does, the reason for it is my lack of attractiveness and not my personality etc.
    In a way it’s just a way to control the situation and prepare myself for something that may never happen.
    So it’s a kind of protection.

    But it’s just a theory!
  • Roaringgael
    Roaringgael Posts: 339 Member
    Over eating does harm us. I think its more that it is a maladaptive behaviour in which we are still trying to find comfort in. That is it worked as a comfort once and we return to it hoping/not even thinking really, that it will reward us in the same way.
    Addiction is all about behaviours that have become harmful and which we are finding almost impossible to stop even though we are aware. They require effort on our part to change. Change is never easy.