I've Been Beating Myself Up

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Replies

  • JustSomeEm
    JustSomeEm Posts: 20,193 MFP Moderator
    This post is absolutely amazing. Thank you so much for sharing! Way to go, you!
  • urloved33
    urloved33 Posts: 3,325 Member
    HONESTLY ..this healthy lifestyle and all the choices we make to have this healthy lifestyle...demands we behave the same way regardless of how we feel. SO. eat well when you don't FEEL LIKE IT...go to the gym WHEN YOU DONT FEEL LIKE IT...anyone can do this when THEY FEEL LIKE IT...you are missing the point.
  • glennagael
    glennagael Posts: 84 Member
    urloved33 wrote: »
    HONESTLY ..this healthy lifestyle and all the choices we make to have this healthy lifestyle...demands we behave the same way regardless of how we feel. SO. eat well when you don't FEEL LIKE IT...go to the gym WHEN YOU DONT FEEL LIKE IT...anyone can do this when THEY FEEL LIKE IT...you are missing the point.

    You're right! This consistency is the key, and we have to have discipline to make the right choices for what's good for us. We live a healthy lifestyle because we're aware of the value of our health, an awareness impossible if we don't appreciate the value of ourselves. That was the point I was trying to make. Thank you for sharing!
  • mom23mangos
    mom23mangos Posts: 3,070 Member
    glennagael wrote: »
    The thing that inspired me in the first place was realizing for the first time that I deserved to be treated well, and that no one had more power to treat me well or treat me badly than I had over myself. You can walk away from bad jobs, bad apartments, bad friends, and bad lovers, but you have to live with yourself every instant of every day. Kindness is what makes the good things happen. Self love is a better motivator than any bad photograph.

    The photo on the right, February 2017, is a girl who was brave enough and cared about herself enough to start. The girl on the left, September 2018, is a girl who is brave enough and cares about herself enough to forgive herself and keep going. This is a little self motivation to help me with that, and it starts by celebrating success.

    You are absolutely beautiful inside and out. I absolutely love your introspection and what you have written really hits all the feels. You are totally worth it. I can't wait to see what your self-love can achieve.
  • jillstreett
    jillstreett Posts: 69 Member
    Beautiful girl, you are amazing. You deserve the world. Your before and after is remarkable and your mindset is so strong, nothing will ever truly break you. I had the same experience when I was in my best friends wedding. Had the time of my life, cried all the happy tears for her, danced, laughed, had literally the most fun. Then saw the photos. I didn't even recognize myself and it killed me. I didn't start my journey until about 6 months later, but dang that was the kick I needed to do what you did and get better, for ME. You got this, you are inspiring us all!
  • Ghostofachance
    Ghostofachance Posts: 305 Member
    I can empathize with you. I lost 130 pounds, but slowly began to let my exercise and diet habits slip and I gained 10-15 pounds. Then, I began a new position at work (the first "new" job I had in over a decade) and I began to mindlessly eat to cope with the stress. Within 18 months, I regained over half of the weight I lost. My self-esteem was near rock bottom because I felt I let myself down. I was back into clothes I left in the closet "just in case" and miserable. I made a commitment to restart and stay on course.

    Fast forward to today, 18 months since I recommitted to my health and I've lost all but 15-20 pounds of the weight I regained. It's all about consistency, putting in the work in the kitchen and the gym and reminding yourself that every day is not going to be "perfect."

    Good luck, I'm rooting for you!
  • katsheare
    katsheare Posts: 1,025 Member
    Like so many others, I've done the dance: decided to see if I could lose weight in 2014 by just watching intake and moving a little bit more (I could. I know. I was shocked, too.), then over the course of about 2 years gained it all back again; fought hard against doing the things I knew would work until a random evening in July 2017 when I decided to stop being silly and start doing what I knew would work. Have been at my maintenance weight since December 2017 or so.

    And in a way, I'm really glad I had my health success to look at and nurture in the early part of this year: I'd lost my grandmother, my first best friend, late last year and her memorial service - with all the family drama that naturally brought - was an incredibly hard week. But I started every day before anyone else had woken up with a 30-45 minute run or bodyweight workout, and that time kept me sane (especially in a place where I had no control over food options... Though my family appreciated my mad veg-prepping skills!!). Then this spring we had our first foster child placement, lasting 4 months, and it was not a good fit for our family. Again, being able to set an example of self-care and self-love to a child who had never been shown any of that made me feel like I was doing something (plus knowing I was giving him food that would nourish him when he hadn't really had that before was huge).

    All of which is to say, @glennagael , that not only is self love the best motivator, but if you let it, it can help tide you through the tough times. Enjoy your strength and loveableness. You are beautiful in both photos.
  • rosanahizon
    rosanahizon Posts: 13 Member
    “I saw myself, as overweight as I'd ever been, but smiling like I never smiled. I didn't see a fat girl. I saw someone who deserved to be treated well...”. This right here. Real talk. Positive vibes to you friend. 👍🏼

  • glennagael
    glennagael Posts: 84 Member
    katsheare wrote: »
    Like so many others, I've done the dance: decided to see if I could lose weight in 2014 by just watching intake and moving a little bit more (I could. I know. I was shocked, too.), then over the course of about 2 years gained it all back again; fought hard against doing the things I knew would work until a random evening in July 2017 when I decided to stop being silly and start doing what I knew would work. Have been at my maintenance weight since December 2017 or so.

    And in a way, I'm really glad I had my health success to look at and nurture in the early part of this year: I'd lost my grandmother, my first best friend, late last year and her memorial service - with all the family drama that naturally brought - was an incredibly hard week. But I started every day before anyone else had woken up with a 30-45 minute run or bodyweight workout, and that time kept me sane (especially in a place where I had no control over food options... Though my family appreciated my mad veg-prepping skills!!). Then this spring we had our first foster child placement, lasting 4 months, and it was not a good fit for our family. Again, being able to set an example of self-care and self-love to a child who had never been shown any of that made me feel like I was doing something (plus knowing I was giving him food that would nourish him when he hadn't really had that before was huge).

    Thank you so much for sharing. If anything I think you make a great case for how we treat our health is a primer for how we let ourselves be treated, as well as a first "defense" to what we cant control! But on a more personal note, I applaud you for your adventures into the foster care world. It's very close to my heart and you might never be able to see the good you do for a child, but it's a seed that keeps growing. I hope you continue that journey, and good luck with your maintenance!

    @rosanahizon ✌That change in perspective is really what started everything. Journeying back to that is key! Thank you girl.
  • marathonroad11
    marathonroad11 Posts: 1 Member
    I am the heaviest I have ever been. I'm on too many medications and this has to stop! My activity level is limited due to a chronic cough x 3 months that is being evaluated but I can be proactive and log my meals and hold myself accountable. If I want different I need to do different.
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