Stubborn 10lb has crept up to 20lb in my 20s...

Hey, I just joined this group as it's nice to find one for people that are maybe a little bigger than they'd like to be but haven't got a crazy amount to lose. I'm 25 from the UK, 5'8", CW 158lbs, GW 135-140lbs. I'm frustrated at my teenage self for thinking I was fat at a weight I now aim to get down to; if only I'd listened to my mum's "You're not fat don't be ridiculous".

Anyway, my weight has been creeping up the last few years. I remember being 140-145lbs at 20, but that has slowly crept up to 155-158lbs. I weighed myself on Monday and was 160lbs, scarily close to officially overweight. I've never weighed that much before. This morning though I was 158 again and I think I was just a bit heavier due to my cycle, but still, it scared me a bit. I've been wanting to shift 'that little extra bit' for years, but how long will I fail to commit before it's no longer just a little? It's already gone from 10lbs to 20lbs. A few extra pounds a year doesn't seem much to worry about until it's been a few years of that in a row, which it has..

I think my problem is consistency. I keep flipping between the idea of a general calorie deficit daily, and intermittent fasting (5:2 or alternate day), however I think this has just ended up giving myself more wiggle room for excuses. I'll start the day planning to fast, give up pathetically just because I want something to eat, then say "Oh it's OK I'll just count my calories and stay under", which I'll also fail to do, feel bad about it, and say I'll try fasting tomorrow because it might be easier... and repeat.

I can just see myself doing this until suddenly I'm 30 and overweight. I want to get this sorted at a time when I have generally fewer responsibilities (no kids etc) and a younger body that will probably find this easier to do. I'm hoping joining this group will help - I'd like to join the accountability challenges, or anything else that might help keep me on track.

Sorry for the long post, but I thought maybe someone else might relate or have some advice. Hopefully this post is at the start of some real change?

Replies

  • HoneyBadger302
    HoneyBadger302 Posts: 1,970 Member
    Find an eating plan that works for you and your lifestyle for starters. You may have to try a few to find the one you like - I kinda ended up with my own variation on OMAD (one meal a day).

    I've done calorie counting and meal prep, and I'll be honest, I lost more weight, faster doing that than I am on my current plan. The issue, however, was while that was great in the winter when my life is pretty routine, once race season hit, that all went out the window more often than not, and I'd undo all my winter work.

    So, I had to find something that worked no matter what. I tried a few things, and finally settled on this. I don't do a true fast - I want my morning coffee with my yummy creamers and that's not going anywhere dangit LOL. If I'm hungry, I allow myself a small (~200 calorie) protein based snack, then have a full dinner.

    For me this works great, because it can follow me anywhere. I don't need to plan ahead all these little snacks, don't need to make a million trips to the grocery store to keep fresh stuff in the house, and I'm not throwing out food because I couldn't eat it in time. If I'm on the road for work or racing, doesn't matter - even if I'm eating out several days in a row, I'm not going to be eating enough to undo all my work.

    Since moving to this eating plan, I've had a slow, but steady, loss. I feel like this is "easy" in that it is fairly natural for me - I prefer not to eat breakfast, and I'm fine not eating a real lunch, but I definitely love having a nice, full dinner where I can have some of the higher calorie sauces (or whatever) that I love and it won't kill my deficit.

    For many people, this plan would not work. It does for me.

    So, find what works for you. Some things to consider:
    • What is your natural eating pattern
    • Do you prefer lighter or larger meals?
    • Does travel or other schedule changes affect you regularly?
    • What are your shopping options and how often can you shop?
    • Is eating out a big consideration?
    • Is drinking a big consideration (one night a week of going crazy on drinks can undo an entire week's worth of work!)?
    • Do you mind "saving up" calories for bigger meals or a night out or prefer to keep every day the same?
  • canadjineh
    canadjineh Posts: 5,396 Member
    I eat somewhat like HoneyBadger155.... I work nights (3rd shift) so I really don't start my day til 3 or 4 pm foodwise. Two cups black coffee because I like it that way and a small low carb protein snack (usually a smoothie type drink) for my first meal - I am not and never have been a big breaky person, ugh, even as a child. Then in 3 or 4 hours proper good size sit-down dinner, still low carb, with my hubby. Protein snack later on shift (11-midnightish) if hungry. I end up doing 16:8 pretty well every day; you may find that easier than having a full 24-48 hr fast every week doing 5:2. Good questions to consider in HoneyBadger's comment, too.
  • gdesousa_93
    gdesousa_93 Posts: 7 Member
    Thank you for the thoughtful replies! I think you're right, I need to find something that's going to work in the long term. That's why in theory I liked the idea of doing 5:2, I could pick a couple of 'quiet' days socially where it wouldn't cause trouble to skip food, but still enjoy the rest of the week without the constant logging of everything (though of course I understand the importance of doing that even for a little bit). Then when I got to a maintenance weight I would just do it once a week instead.

    It also wouldn't require me to have to buy specific foods - I live with two guys (my boyfriend and his flatmate) and we do a big shared food shop together, normally cooking together, and by far their biggest meal is dinner. Both of them snack on smaller things through the day then fill up on a large portion of what is usually something very hearty (stews, pastas, some meat-sauce-rice dish).

    My boyfriend and I were talking the other night about wanting to introduce more of a mediterranean diet, so hopefully I can change the balance of meals a bit. He actually has the opposite problem of me, and has been underweight for most of his adult life, so hopefully that could bring some balance to both of us. Otherwise, I'm going to try and have a smaller portion (so literally half of what they serve themselves!) and supplement with some veg to fill me up, I think that'll be the least intrusive to the way food shopping works for us.

    I'll just go through and answer your questions HoneyBadger155:
    • On a normal eating day I like to have something substantial for breakfast (poached eggs and beans on toast, porridge, or similar) as it prevents me needing to snack until lunch. I get hungry again around 1pm, so that's when I'll have my lunch, and then usually I'm good until I get home and make dinner. Snacking is more of a problem from late afternoon - sometimes I'll go and get something sweet in the last few hours of work, but at home I'm quite bad for picking at things either side of dinner. When I have tried fasting, I find as soon as I eat anything I start getting hungry and it's more difficult to stick to, so I tend to fast from waking until the evening when I'll have something small before bed, which usually works OK.
    • I prefer bigger meals, smaller ones usually leave me craving something else to 'fill the gap'.
    • My schedule is pretty flexible, I'm a grad student so plan my own working hours, and my bf is doing 8am-4pm, so there's not much to prevent a regular routine.
    • We do a big food shop maybe every 1 1/2 to 2 weeks, but I pass a couple of small shops on the walk home so will get fresh stuff as needed from there.
    • I eat out fairly regularly, I'd say at most once a week depending on the time of year. Takeaways have become a problem that we've agreed to cut out, we just got lazy with cooking during a few busy weeks.
    • I rarely go out drinking now, every few weeks I'd say and I've never been someone to drink a lot.
    • Probably saving up calories for something more of a treat would work, I still want to enjoy the odd treat and cutting back for that would be worth it for me.

    At the moment I'm calorie counting, just a 250 deficit for now and mostly so I can get some perspective again on how much I've been eating/a healthy amount of food for a day. Bf and I are going to sit down and pick out some mediterranean-style meals for us to shop for, which will help with that. If I can just commit to this for a couple of weeks, I can then see how it's been going and whether a different pattern/style of eating would work better instead.
  • canadjineh
    canadjineh Posts: 5,396 Member
    Stews and meats with sauce can still be lower carb by not using all the pasta, rice, potatoes as filler... just more above ground veg instead. Big stirfry is a fave at our house, We also like a mock jambalaya made w/o the rice - just lots of the regular veggies, chorizo or other spicy sausage, shrimp, and chicken breast chunks. If rice is really missed, a couple tablespoons on top fool the eye and are just enough. Another favorite in my house is a big taco salad - we tend to use ground beef with our own spices but you can use a mix with beans if you like, Top with good salsa fresca, or jarred with no sugar added, plain Greek yogourt for extra protein, and a few shreds of old cheddar or queso blanco or even feta. You can add olives and avocado for extra healthy fats if desired. Ditch the chips or shell bowl - deep fried fat & starch is a bad combo >:)
  • Glampinupdoll
    Glampinupdoll Posts: 234 Member
    canadjineh wrote: »
    Stews and meats with sauce can still be lower carb by not using all the pasta, rice, potatoes as filler... just more above ground veg instead. Big stirfry is a fave at our house, We also like a mock jambalaya made w/o the rice - just lots of the regular veggies, chorizo or other spicy sausage, shrimp, and chicken breast chunks. If rice is really missed, a couple tablespoons on top fool the eye and are just enough. Another favorite in my house is a big taco salad - we tend to use ground beef with our own spices but you can use a mix with beans if you like, Top with good salsa fresca, or jarred with no sugar added, plain Greek yogourt for extra protein, and a few shreds of old cheddar or queso blanco or even feta. You can add olives and avocado for extra healthy fats if desired. Ditch the chips or shell bowl - deep fried fat & starch is a bad combo >:)

    Riced Cauliflour can be a great option for "rice" . I make pork fried "rice" and my boyfriend LOVES it!
  • canadjineh
    canadjineh Posts: 5,396 Member
    Yes, @Glampinupdoll fried caulirice can be a good substitute. I was spoiled with rice choices though...good basmati, Jasmine, brown long grain, Forbidden black rice, Arborio superfino, and Bhutanese red.... We ate rice as a side dish a lot in my pre-low carbing days as I have Celiac disease.... I do miss the actual flavour of the plain rices with salt.
  • melluc2
    melluc2 Posts: 92 Member
    I'm 30 and overweight! According to the BMI....anyways. Just for reference, I'm 5'4 and 150 lbs. But it is the same as you, I always had 10 lbs to lose and I just could never shake them.

    I'm trying to figure out what will work for me...cause obviously something isn't . I keep track of my meals, but I must be snacking more than I think (1 tbsp of pb, here and there adds up!) And even though I'm active, it just isn't enough. :)

    It's a process and sometimes venting helps too or an honest 'outside' opinion. If you want a someone to talk with, msg me!
  • kristinamajsec
    kristinamajsec Posts: 9 Member
    Hi gals, I just joined the group and thought to join the discussion.
    I'm 31 and was always just barely below the overweight numbers for my height, and from my teens onward trying to lose those 5 kg to get from BMI 24.5 to 22...ish; losing 2-3 kg max and then stalling forever and gaining them back, and more.
    I finally managed to successfully go down the road of manageable weight loss only after giving birth and having +10 more kg to lose. Now I am back to BMI 24.5 :smiley: and losing slowly, but surely.

    What HoneyBadger says, different things work for different people, and we should try to identify what can become a natural part of our life. One thing I can share that helped me a lot was switching from "trying to lose" to "living a better life" mentality. While I was in "trying to lose" mode I was always thinking that I will suffer a bit, diet or workout more, and then I will lose those 5 kg and everything will be well. Only once I had a lot of weight to lose, I finally realized it is a marathon not a sprint. Pregnancy helped me to look at my weight loss journey as a slow road to success.

    This mindset helped me to look for ways I can implement small but lasting changes (swapping one ingredient for a healthier one in my favorite meals, walking 1000-or 2000 or 3000 steps more daily) - and those changes were incremental over time. It helped me to realize I don't have to lose some weight fast and then go on with my life - I should strive to develop a healthier lifestyle one day at a time, one change at a time. How our family eats now is much better than what it was few years ago, without any sense of missing out on favorite treats or any deprivation (just had a homemade cranberry pie :blush: ) - but it was a long journey, and we continue trying to make better choices.

    This "marathon" mentality also helped me not to feel bad, depressed and give up when weight loss would stall (which is inevitable) or when a meal, a whole day or a full few weeks would happen where I was eating less healthy, eating more or working out less (everyone should go on a vacation every once in a while!). It helped me to find a will to come back to the gym after longer periods of inactivity - I simply see it now as inevitable I will workout again eventually, it is part of my life now.

    Everyone has to make choices based on their lifestyle and what works for them, whatever you can incorporate easily into your life - the greater the chance you will stick with that. But also, be kind to yourselves and accept it is a long journey: if you keep making good choices for your health, is it that big of a deal if the weight sticks for a month, or two longer than you want? As long as it starts coming down eventually!

    Sorry for a long post :smile: oversharing a bit
  • SallyLuvsFitness
    SallyLuvsFitness Posts: 13,724 Member
    Hi ladies!

    I have let 15lbs creep up on me over the years. We love to travel and dine out. Overall, we eat fairly healthy and workout; however, the alcohol calories have not helped my diet. I am newer to My Fitness Pal. Please add me and I will help and support back!

  • gdesousa_93
    gdesousa_93 Posts: 7 Member
    Thank you to everyone else commenting, it's good to hear how others feel about it!

    I know some people disagree with the new year's resolution mindset but personally I think it's a nice time to start fresh and try and develop some healthier habits. Like you said Kristin, I'm trying to live healthier rather than diet. I realise that, not only am I perpetually unhappy with the way my body looks or clothes fit, but I'm actually just not looking after myself or treating my body the way it deserves.

    My weight has been jumping around a lot over the holidays, but for now I'm just trying to focus on healthy habits. First for me has been the gym - finding something that works, regardless of weight loss, as even if I was the weight I wanted to be I should still be exercising more than I have been. The past couple of weeks I've been getting up and going to the gym first thing Monday -> Friday, which seems a lot but I'm working out between 30-45 minutes a time, and, compared to when I'd tried alternated days I go, I'm finding it easier if work days also include a gym trip before I start my day, like just another step in my morning routine. I'm liking it so far, but as I should know by now it's too early to tell if I'll stick with it long term - I can only try!

    If any weight loss is going to happen it has to come from my diet. At the moment I'm just trying to make healthier choices, not focusing on calories, then once I have my exercise routine established the next 'step' can be trying to create a calorie deficit. Before I've tried doing both at once (start exercising and cutting down on the same day) and if it had worked I wouldn't be making this post! 'Baby steps' is what you always hear, so maybe these aren't small steps to make but I want to give myself a chance to adapt to one thing before I add in another, hopefully that'll help it last past the first month.
  • Anniebotnen
    Anniebotnen Posts: 332 Member
    Your approach makes a lot of sense to me @gdesousa_93! Once your exercise routine is established, you could start by logging what you’re eating without trying to create a deficit for a week or two, to see what your current calorie level is. That will give you a starting point for figuring out exactly how to create your deficit, based on how much you’d like to lose each week (or month).

    If you stick with your regular exercise program, you’ll also be able to figure out your TDEE after logging and weighing yourself for 4-6 weeks. Then, if you want to, you could set your daily calorie level based on your specific TDEE instead of using the MFP method. This is what I did, because I find it much easier to aim for the same number of calories each day, instead of adjusting calories up and down based on what exercise I’ve done. This worked great for me, because I’m very consistent in regards to exercise. Much better than intermittent fasting, which I tried for awhile and lost nothing. We’re all so different!