The sly/bring you back down to earth/p*ss on your parade comments

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Replies

  • Chef_Barbell
    Chef_Barbell Posts: 6,646 Member
    smolmaus wrote: »
    Chef_Barbell wrote: »

    None of that matters for the OP. Choosing not to post something is an option. That's all it is. You're making it more than it needs to be.

    Oh definitely but I just have a strong opinion on things like this. Telling her to just stop posting feels like victim blaming when she hasn't done anything to deserve someone being mean to her, and it really rubs me up the wrong way. Nothing personal, I just need to counter that when I see it.

    It's really derailing the thread though.
  • stricklee11
    stricklee11 Posts: 218 Member
    edited January 2019
    BMsJourney wrote: »
    ladystrick11 wrote: »
    I did from a coworker. There was birthday cake available and I declined taking a piece. She then made a huge scene and when I told her I had just started my diet, she made fun of me and encouraged another coworker to join in on the laughs. Luckily, he had more professionalism and told her to stop. Sadly, my department will be starting a biggest loser challenge next week. And guess who put herself in charge of collecting the data? Yep... So I am seriously considering sitting it out just so I don't have to deal with her on a weekly basis...

    Plenty of accountability friends to be found on MFP - sit it out in good conscience, knowing your are 100% able to succeed without them! :smiley:

    That's what I was thinking. Funny enough, she made it a point to come to me yesterday because she noticed I have not signed up for the challenge yet. The deadline is today...
  • cariwaldick
    cariwaldick Posts: 189 Member
    I'm with smolmaus--you shouldn't have to change your behavior, if you've got an expectation that friends and family will be supportive. Sure, on the internet in general, anything goes. But among family, friends, and co-workers, you should be able to expect support--or failing that--silence. The internet gives people permission to be rude, crude, and socially unacceptable, and it's not something we should put up with--especially among friends and family.

    I love the response, "Sorry, I'm not accepting comments on my body today." That's a healthy way to let them know they stepped out of line. I also think the original poster did a healthy thing, coming here to share, rather than what I would have done--come at them with both barrels blazing.

    I suspect men don't get comments like those typically directed at women. I saw a comment toward my niece as she was losing weight and getting fit: "Your face is so cute, but you need to work out more, and lose that gut." No one would say that to a man. Everyone feels entitled to comment on female bodies--and often we accept or excuse it.

    Personally, I haven't heard any negative comments from people--yet. I've still got 60 lbs to go, from being morbidly obese. I get nothing but encouragement. As I get closer to my goal, I'm sure people will have more to say. I've already heard the disbelief when I say I've got 70 to go.

    Ladystrick11--Please don't let them get to you! Whether you do their "biggest loser" challenge or not, keep going. You already turned down cake, and that's hard to do when you're just starting out. You can take advantage of the diet-friendly atmosphere, talk about your losses, and not have to worry about your belittling co-worker. And wouldn't it be funny if you lost more than their winner?
  • AnnPT77
    AnnPT77 Posts: 31,935 Member
    Pardyqueenxoxo wrote: »
    kgeyser wrote: »
    OP, some people on the internet just need to comment on things like that because they are insecure about themselves, and "showing off" their knowledge makes them feel valued. It happens all the time on health and fitness sites, where someone posts something and another person will completely ignore the main idea of the post to focus on one little comment or statement that they think is "wrong." See how valuable and knowledgeable they are?! They corrected the misinformation!

    Some people never gained the wisdom to know when speaking up is helpful and when it's obnoxious, or they just don't have the social graces to understand the appropriate response in a situation. The nice thing about the internet is that in doing so, they put it all out there for everyone else to see.

    Congrats on your 22.6%! I've been around that same number according to one of those machines, and even if it's not accurate, I know how dedicated you have to have been to even get that number. You should be really proud of yourself and the work you've put in.




    Thank you!

    ands I understand that if i share things then its down to me to get criticism and deal with it, however. people find it easier to put people down as oppose to being pleased for people. if someone puts on facebook "going out for drinks with the girls and getting hammered" evryone thinks its awesome. lose weight, get fit and healthy people slate you!

    There are a few in any random crowd who applaud some others' poor choices, in order to shore up behaviors of their own that they secretly know are unproductive; or make jokes about those working hard to improve, to let themselves off the hook for not taking positive steps in their own lives. That's sad - pathetic, really, as they're on a bad long term course physically, psychologically, and socially.

    But if this is the general tone of reaction around you - and please understand I mean this in the kindest way - it may be time to intentionally and gradually work at surrounding yourself with some new people, ones who have a positive attitude toward goal-setting and self-improvement, ones who will support you as you support them.
  • Floydy89
    Floydy89 Posts: 23 Member
    Fantastic achievement and I’d suggest it’s the guy that messaged you that ‘chats s**t’.

    They’re an estimate but if you’re using that same machine each time then that is very much demonstrating your tremendous progress.

    You should be able to report on progress without having to worry about any sort of negative or derogatory feedback. Keep doing what you’re doing but I’d strongly consider deleting him from your social media.
  • SisterSueGetsFit
    SisterSueGetsFit Posts: 1,212 Member
    ladystrick11 wrote: »
    I did from a coworker. There was birthday cake available and I declined taking a piece. She then made a huge scene and when I told her I had just started my diet, she made fun of me and encouraged another coworker to join in on the laughs. Luckily, he had more professionalism and told her to stop. Sadly, my department will be starting a biggest loser challenge next week. And guess who put herself in charge of collecting the data? Yep... So I am seriously considering sitting it out just so I don't have to deal with her on a weekly basis...

    Don't sit it out. You show her what a winner you are. If she's rude, talk to human resources.
  • MzCongeniality70
    MzCongeniality70 Posts: 352 Member
    edited January 2019
    ladystrick11 wrote: »
    I did from a coworker. There was birthday cake available and I declined taking a piece. She then made a huge scene and when I told her I had just started my diet, she made fun of me and encouraged another coworker to join in on the laughs. Luckily, he had more professionalism and told her to stop. Sadly, my department will be starting a biggest loser challenge next week. And guess who put herself in charge of collecting the data? Yep... So I am seriously considering sitting it out just so I don't have to deal with her on a weekly basis...

    No, girl!!! You go in there and own that **IT!!! She's a nasty person. You keep being amazing!!!
  • MzCongeniality70
    MzCongeniality70 Posts: 352 Member
    Pardyqueenxoxo wrote: »
    Meant 22.6% body fat sorry! xx

    Great job on your achievement!!! Don't let insecure people piss on your happiness xo
  • garystrickland357
    garystrickland357 Posts: 598 Member
    I’m sorry you experienced that. Like others I don’t share anything concerning my weight loss at work or on social media. I HAVE found MFP to be a great place to share successes and concerns. So - share and vent here. Congrats on your progress.
  • Running2Fit
    Running2Fit Posts: 702 Member
    What an *kitten*. I actually share quite a bit of my weight loss/fitness stuff on social media and have been lucky enough to be surrounded by positive, awesome people. I find posting on Instagram to be a really great part of my weight loss journey. I’d block him (or whatever you it is you do to make people go away on SnapChat) and move on from his comment. Some people just like to tear others down, it has more to do with their own insecurities than with you. Surround yourself with positive people and ignore the haters.
  • Sunrain2018
    Sunrain2018 Posts: 24 Member
    The guy you describe is an Idiot... I’d call him out and then block him, that’s what I’d do anyways... I have a low tolerance for negative or idiotic people in my life. You are doing an excellent job on your journey 😀!!
  • Chef_Barbell
    Chef_Barbell Posts: 6,646 Member
    smolmaus wrote: »
    Chef_Barbell wrote: »
    It's really derailing the thread though.

    I think it's relevant. It's obviously a fairly ubiquitous experience but people have different ways of dealing with it.

    To provide content: one particular family member used to say I must have been eating gluten again to have lost weight. I have ceoliac disease and was skinny when I was younger because I was malnourished. Like I would risk bowel cancer just to lose some bodyfat. I was fairly depressed at the time, unemployed and didn't have much to be proud of except that I'd managed to figure out a better way to eat and was making progress. It did feel exactly like she was just pulling me down for no reason. I can't take my own advice and just cut her out in this case but I can make it clear I'm just not accepting behavior like that anymore.

    "Sorry I'm not accepting comments on my body today" shuts people up nicely.

    Good for you. 👍🏼
  • Pardyqueenxoxo
    Pardyqueenxoxo Posts: 218 Member
    awww just picked up some repies and i must say thank you!

    back to how i mentioned though about how people can post that they out partying and everyone think its awesome, next time I'll put " yes but think of your poor liver and you'll feel so damn rough tomorrow." ;);)

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