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Body Positive Movement - For or against?
Replies
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JustinAnimal wrote: »
This deserves repeating.
I think that before we can want better for ourselves we must learn to accept who we are. No need to say more...the above post says it all.
I don't disagree, but also I was about to type that I used to be in gigantic denial. At almost 300 pounds, I could turn sideways, suck in my gut, look in the mirror and think, "You're not THAT far from high school...." I was, though, I was.
Anyway, I was GOING to say that before we can better ourselves, we have to admit that we aren't in our ideal shape.
[/quote]
@JustinAnimal True Story
A couple of years ago I had lost 85lbs...10-15lbs away from my goal. I have a protruding stomach due to some large hernias. It makes me look as if I am 5 months pregnant at age 66. I dealt with this during my weight loss telling myself I would never have a flat stomach but I would be healthier. However it was a constant struggle accepting that I would never look slim.
One day while out taking a walk I stopped in a nearby furniture store. A clerk walked up to help me. Within just a couple of minutes she pointed to my stomach and said..."What's that?". At first I didn't answer because I didn't know what she was talking about. She pointed again and said..."What is that?". I then realized that she was pointing to my stomach and the only thing that I could say was..."Don't worry...I didn't stick a sofa up my shirt". I was floored that someone would be so rude. I left the store angry...swore I would not ever go back. I also left embarrassed and humiliated. I was right back where I started...trying to accept myself as I am. I gained all the weight back and it has taken this long to start caring enough about myself to try again.
The problem that I see is that most of us know we are not "ideal" whatever that is. We just don't care enough about ourselves to put out the effort it takes. Society often reminds us that we are not perfect...that we are not "ideal".[/quote]
You should have taken a page from Julia Roberts's character in "Pretty Woman" and asked her if she worked on commission before leaving.4 -
As a med student all I can say is that i'm all for body positivity and selflove but not pro-fat. Selflove to me means loving yourself but also caring about your health and well-being and always trying to make yourself better than you were yesterday. And also high body fat percentage is unhealthy in so many ways and that is a medical fact. Facts are facts. And in more than 80% overweight people the reason is eating more than they should and not doing any physical activity, endocrine problems are in much smaller percentage the reason. I was first the one to make excuses "but i was always "bigger" for the most of my life, i have slow metabolism blah blah..." those were just excuses, i've lost around 20kg and maintaining that weight for 3 years without much effort, my metabolism is completely normal
(coming from a person who really was bigger than others for most of my life since puberty) 7 -
To everyone who posted their opinions on the "pro-fat" topic, why do you feel the need to share your feelings on that when the thread is about the body positivity movement? Honestly just curious.19
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MADDIESMOMMY6611 wrote: »How do you feel about the body positive movement? I haven't given it much thought but recently stumbled onto a few forums on a bodybuilding website where the overall theme was extremely against this movement. One commenter went as far as to say people for the movement are looking to destroy our country (USA) by promoting unhealthy eating habits and laziness.
What does this movement mean to you? Do you agree or disagree with it?
According to some sections of the internet, lots of things are "destroying America", usually by promoting being kinder and more accepting of others. I tend not to listen to them.
To me, this is a no brainer. Why wouldn't we encourage people to feel positive about themselves, regardless of body type? This can mean fat, thin, tall, short, whatever. Being positive and comfortable with oneself does not mean the same thing as not wanting to change anything about it. I am both positive about my body and trying to lose weight. They are not mutually exclusive.
This is not the first type of thread similar to this, and there is always inevitably a portion of the audience who believes that we shouldn't do anything that could be construed about encouraging obesity and they believe that shaming people will make them eventually change. To be blunt, I think that's a way to try to justify being a bully and not feel bad about it. Other people's health decisions are not any of our business. It is not our business or responsibility to get them to try to change. We only have a responsibility to be kind and decent to everyone.
Lack of body positivity is something that some people harm or even kill themselves over. So I think it is something that is important to promote. Especially now with the internet and social media, people see a lot out there constantly that makes them feel bad about themselves, so if we can counter that by promoting things that help to counteract that, then I am in support of it.16 -
It's good to love yourself, no matter what. Accepting different body types is great. Shaming doesn't help anyone, and if it does, it's a rare and somewhat twisted case indeed. But I also think it's important not to go overboard with this "all bodies are beautiful" message and lose all common sense and think it's perfectly healthy for an average human to weigh 500 lb. Balance is key as with most things.8
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seltzermint555 wrote: »It's good to love yourself, no matter what. Accepting different body types is great. Shaming doesn't help anyone, and if it does, it's a rare and somewhat twisted case indeed. But I also think it's important not to go overboard with this "all bodies are beautiful" message and lose all common sense and think it's perfectly healthy for an average human to weigh 500 lb. Balance is key as with most things.
If ever this is deemed necessary this should always be limited to behavior and not the individual.
It is critical to point out that people are not their behavior, something missing from our collective ideology and having a horrendous result.12 -
seltzermint555 wrote: »It's good to love yourself, no matter what. Accepting different body types is great. Shaming doesn't help anyone, and if it does, it's a rare and somewhat twisted case indeed. But I also think it's important not to go overboard with this "all bodies are beautiful" message and lose all common sense and think it's perfectly healthy for an average human to weigh 500 lb. Balance is key as with most things.
If ever this is deemed necessary this should always be limited to behavior and not the individual.
It is critical to point out that people are not their behavior, something missing from our collective ideology and having a horrendous result.
I have a little trouble with this sentiment. People who murder aren't murderers? I understand not punishing an addict for their behavior, and, I suppose, overeating is an addiction in many rights if not all of them. Still... having trouble finding the words.
I don't think people should be shamed... but I think our actions dictate who we are as people. People who chronically overeat and undermove are obese... I'm all over the place. Nevermind!5 -
sammidelvecchio wrote: »To everyone who posted their opinions on the "pro-fat" topic, why do you feel the need to share your feelings on that when the thread is about the body positivity movement? Honestly just curious.
As someone who addressed it in my post, I am just going to say that I have rarely seen people talk about body positivity without conflating the two topics. I can't imagine what reason one might have to disagree with the concept of body positivity without bringing up being anti-fat-acceptance. And I have only rarely seen anyone do it.
I can't speak for anyone else, but I do feel like the gist of a lot of the other posts that mention it were pretty much operating on the same logic. I think almost everyone here gets the difference, but the two things seem to be almost inseparably linked in the social consciousness. Because of that, I feel like it bears repeating that not only is body positivity a good thing for everyone, but that the parts of it that have become meshed with the fat acceptance movement do have that same core of goodness and compassion woven into them as well- even if the message does get distorted at times. I feel that is the main reason why I, and others, would bring it up.8 -
I'm all for loving our bodies, but I don't think its right to celebrate being fat. All we are doing is teaching the younger generations to care less about their health. Do I think we should criticize people for being overweight? Absolutely not, but we shouldn't be promoting obesity either.
In my opinion (and this is probably a very unpopular opinion) if you TRULY love your body, you will do what you can to make sure that it is healthy.
I eat right and exercise BECAUSE I love my body- not because I hate it.14 -
I care about the eating habits of other people as much as I care about their sleeping or working habits. That is, not much unless they're closely related or explicitly asked me for advice. I also believe body positivity is important no matter what your size is. I even support the core concept of health at every size, that is, if losing weight is not currently a priority, there is no reason at all to stop caring about all other aspects of one's health. It's not an all or nothing deal. I'll even go a step further and say I support fat acceptance if fat acceptance is currently the best option for a person.
What I don't support is deluding yourself that your statistic health risks are equal to your health risks at a lower weight, that you're doomed to be a certain weight because that's what your body wants, or that having a healthy discussion about weight is fat shaming.18 -
brittanystebbins95 wrote: »I'm all for loving our bodies, but I don't think its right to celebrate being fat. All we are doing is teaching the younger generations to care less about their health. Do I think we should criticize people for being overweight? Absolutely not, but we shouldn't be promoting obesity either.
In my opinion (and this is probably a very unpopular opinion) if you TRULY love your body, you will do what you can to make sure that it is healthy.
I eat right and exercise BECAUSE I love my body- not because I hate it.
Why would you think this is unpopular; it is much like what most other posters said. I have not seen one person here saying they celebrate obesity or promote it.
I basically agree with what amusedmonkey says just above, but that's obviously not promoting obesity.
I do think that for some people, likely not most of those who need to lose, focusing on weight loss can become a frustrating thing that feels impossible and is tied up in feelings of self hatred. For them, focusing on different aspects of health and trying to address other eating issues (often there's a binge and purge or extreme restrict and then binge thing going on) not only will help with body positivity and health, but IMO often leads to weight loss as well.2 -
brittanystebbins95 wrote: »I'm all for loving our bodies, but I don't think its right to celebrate being fat. All we are doing is teaching the younger generations to care less about their health. Do I think we should criticize people for being overweight? Absolutely not, but we shouldn't be promoting obesity either.
In my opinion (and this is probably a very unpopular opinion) if you TRULY love your body, you will do what you can to make sure that it is healthy.
I eat right and exercise BECAUSE I love my body- not because I hate it.
Why would you think this is unpopular; it is much like what most other posters said. I have not seen one person here saying they celebrate obesity or promote it.
I basically agree with what amusedmonkey says just above, but that's obviously not promoting obesity.
I do think that for some people, likely not most of those who need to lose, focusing on weight loss can become a frustrating thing that feels impossible and is tied up in feelings of self hatred. For them, focusing on different aspects of health and trying to address other eating issues (often there's a binge and purge or extreme restrict and then binge thing going on) not only will help with body positivity and health, but IMO often leads to weight loss as well.
Not so much here, but everywhere else it seems to be unpopular. But here is filled with people trying to better themselves and live healthier lifestyles. Now, Facebook, for example? Heaven forbid anyone mentions being healthy, or you're suddenly bigoted or "fat-shaming"4 -
To circle back around: I would give anything to feel good in my own skin. I envy those who love their bodies, no matter what shape.11
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Boba_14626 wrote: »To circle back around: I would give anything to feel good in my own skin. I envy those who love their bodies, no matter what shape.
I don't think it's as much loving our bodies as it is learning to accept ourselves as we are. What you see in the mirror is not who you are. I personally believe that as long as anyone is looking at appearance only, they will never truly come to terms with the fact that Hey - there just might be a person worth knowing in there. 6 -
Boba_14626 wrote: »To circle back around: I would give anything to feel good in my own skin. I envy those who love their bodies, no matter what shape.
I don't think it's as much loving our bodies as it is learning to accept ourselves as we are. What you see in the mirror is not who you are. I personally believe that as long as anyone is looking at appearance only, they will never truly come to terms with the fact that Hey - there just might be a person worth knowing in there.
Agreed.
One thing that helped me when I first decided to lose (and was feeling out of control and paranoid that it wouldn't work for me) was to decide that I was going to be as healthy as possible, no matter my weight. So I did cut calories, improved nutrition somewhat (mostly by cooking more), and started an exercise program (based around being nice to myself, not my old habit of immediately thinking I could keep up some punishing workout), and then gradually increased workouts until I was into all kinds of training goals.
I did lose weight, of course, but what was amazing is how quickly I felt far better about my body, even more than when I'd been much thinner (as a younger person) but fixated on my flaws. It was because I was so much more focused on what I could do, and achieving achievable goals, and not beating myself up or focusing so much on appearance or what I thought others thought.
Before I did any of this, I also I think came to terms with the fact that I did basically like myself as a person (although one who could certainly work on many things), and was able to use the areas I felt confident in (research skills, basic intelligence, discipline in a variety of things) to apply to my weight/fitness too. I tried to stop thinking of my body as something separate from me, but instead part of me, as one whole person.7 -
Boba_14626 wrote: »To circle back around: I would give anything to feel good in my own skin. I envy those who love their bodies, no matter what shape.
I don't think it's as much loving our bodies as it is learning to accept ourselves as we are. What you see in the mirror is not who you are. I personally believe that as long as anyone is looking at appearance only, they will never truly come to terms with the fact that Hey - there just might be a person worth knowing in there.
Agreed.
One thing that helped me when I first decided to lose (and was feeling out of control and paranoid that it wouldn't work for me) was to decide that I was going to be as healthy as possible, no matter my weight. So I did cut calories, improved nutrition somewhat (mostly by cooking more), and started an exercise program (based around being nice to myself, not my old habit of immediately thinking I could keep up some punishing workout), and then gradually increased workouts until I was into all kinds of training goals.
I did lose weight, of course, but what was amazing is how quickly I felt far better about my body, even more than when I'd been much thinner (as a younger person) but fixated on my flaws. It was because I was so much more focused on what I could do, and achieving achievable goals, and not beating myself up or focusing so much on appearance or what I thought others thought.
Before I did any of this, I also I think came to terms with the fact that I did basically like myself as a person (although one who could certainly work on many things), and was able to use the areas I felt confident in (research skills, basic intelligence, discipline in a variety of things) to apply to my weight/fitness too. I tried to stop thinking of my body as something separate from me, but instead part of me, as one whole person.
That's quite the journey. And I love what I bolded at the bottom there. That's a huge step to take and I love hearing stories like yours. I've been seeing my daughter go through a very similar Journey so yours is very inspiring. 🙂3 -
JustinAnimal wrote: »seltzermint555 wrote: »It's good to love yourself, no matter what. Accepting different body types is great. Shaming doesn't help anyone, and if it does, it's a rare and somewhat twisted case indeed. But I also think it's important not to go overboard with this "all bodies are beautiful" message and lose all common sense and think it's perfectly healthy for an average human to weigh 500 lb. Balance is key as with most things.
If ever this is deemed necessary this should always be limited to behavior and not the individual.
It is critical to point out that people are not their behavior, something missing from our collective ideology and having a horrendous result.
I have a little trouble with this sentiment. People who murder aren't murderers? I understand not punishing an addict for their behavior, and, I suppose, overeating is an addiction in many rights if not all of them. Still... having trouble finding the words.
I don't think people should be shamed... but I think our actions dictate who we are as people. People who chronically overeat and undermove are obese... I'm all over the place. Nevermind!
Your reaction is natural and I struggle with the same issue. Boils down to hate the sin, but love the sinner. If you don't separate the act from the actor, then you remove all chance of redemption. There is a good deal of risk mitigation at play here, so while criminal assault would demand some manner of punishment, there is no such need with less risky or offensive behavior.
There is increasing evidence that addiction is merely a symptom of a deeper root cause - loss of purpose.
Johann Hari has been studying this behavior in drug addiction, but I believe his hypothesis is correct and his solution would address several other symptoms - obesity, depression, etc.
https://www.ted.com/talks/johann_hari_everything_you_think_you_know_about_addiction_is_wrong?language=en3 -
I am against. I am also against body shaming. But, I will never tell someone who is unhealthy that they are fine. I have been there, and I know it is not fine. Live and let live is a motto I stand by, but, if you ask me, I will tell you.9
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I'd say everybody needs to just tend to their own damn business. A fanatics are bad no matter what their particular brand of fanaticism happens to be.
But this whole "glorifying obesity" thing is wrong. Too many folks sick and dying from it. So we're back to minding one's own business. Ridiculing folks is simply mean and wrong. Telling them, "It's ok that you're morbidly obese" is simply mean and wrong too.
Live your life, and stay the hell out of everybody elses unless you're helping them in a goal that "they have set for themselves!". Seems simple to me.
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100% against. It's pro-obesity insanity.15
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