WOMEN AGES 50+ FOR JANUARY 2020

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Replies

  • klanders30
    klanders30 Posts: 2,569 Member
    <3
  • KetoneKaren
    KetoneKaren Posts: 6,411 Member
    Lisa
    This is a photo of Jeanette (blond) and Connie (brunette)b2ooemabskim.jpg
  • OregonMother
    OregonMother Posts: 1,553 Member

    Flea - That's what my Bailey had. <3

    Karen and Annie -- how long did your dogs live with it?

    I'm going to be honest, and I know many of you can relate, I am having a hard time with this. :cry: Even though we have been talking about it as a family for the past week, and we had all recognized that this is probably what it was, to actually hear it said, out loud, by a medical professional. It was hard.

    Flea
    Willamette Valley, Oregon
  • GodMomKim
    GodMomKim Posts: 3,619 Member
    Karen in Virginia (((((((((((((((hugs)))))))))))))))) there are no words.
  • OregonMother
    OregonMother Posts: 1,553 Member
    Oh, Karen. I am so, so sad for you.

    Jeanette is being ridiculous.

    Flea
    Willamette Valley, Oregon
  • margaretturk
    margaretturk Posts: 5,025 Member
    Karen I too am sorry for the difficulties with your friend. Sending healing thoughts...
  • margaretturk
    margaretturk Posts: 5,025 Member
    Sue Happy Birthday! :flowerforyou:
  • SophieRosieMom
    SophieRosieMom Posts: 3,286 Member
    edited February 2020
    Karen in VA -

    I think Lisa has excellent advice. And, perhaps Jeanette felt that her friendship had been replaced by your partner in your life and you wouldn't be interested in hearing the home town news anymore. Or....
    I wouldn't trust Connie as far as I could throw her. Here we go...

    Makes me wonder what she REALLY told Jeanette - she betrayed you, to begin with, by telling Jeanette when you asked her not to. And has now replaced YOU as Jeanette's trusted friend. Is she the type that gets off on creating drama like this?

    Jeanette sounds like a loving, open minded person so this type of behavior toward you is puzzling. Yes, you two need a good heart to heart. I'm the type, if it really bothered me, to ask Jeanette how she felt when she first heard the news from Connie. Because maybe it wasn't delivered in the best manner.

    I might be way off base on my gut feeling about Connie, but I tend to attribute ulterior motives to people who betray trusts like that. Either that or they are very out of touch with other people's feelings and the damage they can do by not keeping their mouths shut when asked to.
    Know that we love you, no matter what.

    Lanette
    Blustery SW WA State
  • Machka9
    Machka9 Posts: 24,707 Member
    skuehn48 wrote: »
    Well today is my birthday. I am now 72. That seems awfully old and I wonder where all that time went. That comment "the days go slowly but the years fly by" seems very true today. I celebrated with family last Friday as that was when my DGD could be there. Today I went to chair yoga and bought groceries. Tomorrow DD and I are going to Woodinville. I have a gift card for See's Candies and Barnes and Noble so will use those. We will have lunch at Panera and then visit a western wear, tack shop that we have seen over there. We stopped by it once but it was closed.

    Everyone take care, Sue in WA

    Happy Birthday!
  • KetoneKaren
    KetoneKaren Posts: 6,411 Member
    Flea This is another long post about a specific topic (dog heart failure) so I'm putting it into a spoiler to make it easier for people not interested to skip over.
    Bailey had a heart murmur for years but he was without symptoms. November 2018 he became symptomatic, had the workup, went on meds. We helped him over the Rainbow Bridge 3 weeks ago, 14 months after he became symptomatic. The cardiologist said 6-12 months for most dogs once they are symptomatic, but it sounds as if your vet thinks your boy may live longer than that, which would be great.

    It is really, really hard. I miss Bailey so much. Heart failure in dogs is a progressive disease resulting from leaky heart valves between the chambers of the heart. The leaky valves allow fluid to regurgitate backwards through the valves.This causes the heart to dilate, further straining the valves, which become even leakier until the heart finally can't compensate any more even with medicines. Fluid also backs up into the lungs, which is why the dog coughs & sometimes produces foamy phlegm. They do not do valve surgery on dog's hearts except as part of clinical trials in research centers, so it is only managed medically. Bailey was on an inotrope Pimobendin (makes the heart muscle squeeze more efficiently), a diuretic Lasix (fluid pill) to prevent fluid from building up in the lungs and reduce the work the heart has to do, and an ACE inhibitor Benazepril (reduces afterload on the heart so the heart doesn't have to pump against as much resistance. The ACE inhibitor also helps keep potassium in the body & helps protect the dog's kidneys). I don't know if your doggie will be on all of those medicines. I tweaked & adjusted the fluid pill as needed based on Bailey's respiratory rate at rest & if he had any coughing. I got really good at keeping Bailey fine-tuned, so his quality of life was very good until the very end. The cardiologist didn't tell me to tweak the fluid pill. Honestly, I discussed it with another medical friend who had kept her heart failure dog going for a long time by adjusting the Lasix, & I determined that I was going to do that too, & I did. It was the right decision.

    We did keep belly bands (male diapers) on him because the diuretic increases urine output so much there is no way we could keep up with the trips outside to pee. In fact, we used a really absorbent pad inside the belly band which worked better & was less expensive than the belly bands alone.

    I would say that if you could see the enlarged heart & fluid in the lungs yourself with an untrained eye that you may want to have a second discussion with your vet to be sure that he/she really meant 2 years - I don't want you to have false hopes & have the rug pulled out from under you if you might have less time left with your adorable doggie.

    I am right here if you want to discuss this with me in a spoiler or PM.

    Karen in Virginia
  • KetoneKaren
    KetoneKaren Posts: 6,411 Member
    Kim & Lisa & anyone else who slogged through my sad tale Thank you. I'm a bit of a mess but I really needed to tell someone about this ongoing pain.
  • JRsLateInLifeMom
    JRsLateInLifeMom Posts: 2,275 Member
    Annie- Think it’s more many from your Moms generation. We’re taught fried chicken,cake,a few healthy or not sides were a balanced meal no one counted calories. My Aunt (2nd Cousin who never had kids) doesn’t get it believed my counting calories is unhealthy will hurt me! Yes my Moms side is very over weight of course. Just do what’s right for you she’ll eventually catch on. If only she could Bake 1 piece for you without skin set it aside it be different! But that’s probably not going to happen..see if you can cook put food in Tupperware when she’s not at the stove you can eat her broccoli with your meats.

    Amber Tx
  • Poerava14
    Poerava14 Posts: 1,056 Member
    Sue: Happy birthday! 🎂 The mention of Woodinville brought back great memories of meeting you there.

    Karen in VA: No words, just hugs and waves of loving thoughts beaming your way. You have so many people who treasure you. Wallow in those blessings.

    Flea: I am so sorry about your sweet pup. As for handling more administrative work, it sounds like you have integrity and resourcefulness, two attributes that make for great leaders.

    Beth: Good advice. Thank you for the input.

    NSV for January:
    > improvements to the master bathroom to make it more safe and attractive
    > played tourist in our own town with an impromptu 2-night getaway
    > reorganized my desk and DH's side of the closet
    > got started with the transfer of an inherited piece of property overseas. Only took 32 years!

    Stay well friends. I am in awe of all of you wonderful women.

    Rori
    In the NOW
    Colorado Foothills

  • KetoneKaren
    KetoneKaren Posts: 6,411 Member
    There was a lot of cross-posting going on so I missed a bunch of supportive comments.

    Thank you SO MUCH everybody for commenting on my woes with my BFF. It's been many years ago that the rift occurred but I am eternally hopeful, and I guess "What do you long for?" unleashed my angst.

    Lanette,
    Connie has been in trouble with her own husband for blabbing private family business about his siblings. She is very careful now not to do that, but she had to learn that lesson several times & jeopardized her marriage before she zipped her lip about his family. She's just a blabbermouth, not vicious. She & Jeanette were already friends who for years had been meeting for coffee every morning & Fridays for wine & scrapbooking when this happened. I have lived thousands of miles away for decades so have not been a part of the day to day friendships. Having said that, according to other pals, Jeanette does not confide in Connie the way she confided in me (I wonder why). I should not have trusted Connie with my secret but really had no choice as they were out-of-town guests. Connie's husband Jeff has been my good buddy since birth, and is completely discrete & trustworthy, and I allowed myself to believe that Connie would keep her mouth shut because she made her promise to me with him as witness. I am quite sure she incurred his wrath when she betrayed my confidence. I love Connie, but I don't usually trust her with any confidences. She is a good soul, but loves to gossip. Her lips are especially loose when alcohol is involved. I should have called Jeanette while Connie & Jeff were still visiting me, before she got back to Nebraska. But even if I had, I'm not sure I would have succeeded.

    Karen in Virginia
  • KetoneKaren
    KetoneKaren Posts: 6,411 Member
    Sue t3334.gif