We broke up because...
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She was evil, kept trying to poison my protein shakes0
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she wasn't comfortable going to a German sauna with me0
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I wanted to show her off to my group of friends, but she said she had some bad memories of other times she was shown off.0
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I'm not a circus act. He can't make me be in the spotlight0
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she was always pinching my muffin top in public, it was embarrassing1
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He just ran away one day
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I ran away with the gingerbread man0
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She ate all my gingerbread!0
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He was too super1
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Super at being a workaholic..0
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there were always strange men in her spare bedroom. I couldnt trust her0
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He caught me in her room, it was a strange moment.0
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she expected me to open the jars w/out running them under hot water. What am I, the hulk?0
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She always had her head in the sand0
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He never changed his shirt.0
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He died of kryptomite poisoning, it was so sad. He left his cape for me though, yea!0
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He never let me wear a cape, no matter how much I wanted to.0
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HE didn't even let me wear his mask1
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Always wore a mask.. I didn't even know what he looked like0
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Never let me pet a kangaroo0
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