How to set an appropriate goal?

globalc00 wrote: »

My body fat according to fitbit aria is 13.5%. at 140 lbs. I"m 5"8. I have a weight training routine that I currently follow. Unfortunately, outside of the exercise I currently do to get to where i'm at, my preference is to sit in front of computer and play games and watch you tube. I have no desire to do any outdoor activity or join some competition/race such as a marathon. So my issue is at this point is if I stop my routine, am I just being lazy, or unmotivated or just part of getting old?

globalc00 wrote: »

To be honest, I would classify my self as lazy as i prefer to sit around or lay around all day. However because of the desire to be healthy I have always gotten my exercise in. I avg more than 20K steps a day, and haven't missed 20k steps a day in over 1 year. I get up at 5:30 every day just to work out. But like my original post says. The desire or motivation to continue to do this is diminishing. I have done a lot of googling and the common theme is that I need a goal. I just don't know what is a good goal at this point. Seems like anything I set would be a step backwards and I just feel like that would be me being lazy or slacking or becoming unmotivated.

I'm going to be a bit of an outlier here, and assert that there's no reason to have a goal just because some internet thingummies say that's how to feel more motivated. Sure, that's one way, and it works for a lot of people. It might work for you. But it's not the only option.

I'm not a goal-motivated person, personally, Pretty much never have been. If I realize (abstractly, cognitively) that there's some change I should make in my life, to improve it, I usually try to figure out how to game my personality, preferences, limitations, etc., to get me there.

You're doing a lot of the right things for your health, and I'd point out (as an oldie myself) that those are also vitally important to the health and independence as you age. (Many of my age-mates are a vivid illustration of the "don't do this" example, sadly.) For me, that's a lot of the source of my motivation these days: I want to keep feeling good, and being able to live on my own, in the way I like to live, for another few decades. So, I try to balance my current enjoyments (which include many sedentary hobbies, plus an inclination to laziness) with visualizing my future self, and considering her needs. She needs me to be healthy, active, strong . . . or her life is going to be kind of miserable.

globalc00 wrote: »

My body fat according to fitbit aria is 13.5%. at 140 lbs. I"m 5"8. I have a weight training routine that I currently follow. Unfortunately, outside of the exercise I currently do to get to where i'm at, my preference is to sit in front of computer and play games and watch you tube. I have no desire to do any outdoor activity or join some competition/race such as a marathon. So my issue is at this point is if I stop my routine, am I just being lazy, or unmotivated or just part of getting old?

globalc00 wrote: »

Perhaps I am burnt out. But how do you differentiate being burnt out vs someone just making excuses? If someone else on here was just starting their fitness journey, and 1 week later, they say they are burnt out, what would you say? My guesses are "We know it's hard. You just got to push though it. You can do it. It's not going to be easy. There will be ups and downs. If it was easy, everyone would be in shape. You got to want it. Remember why you started this" or something along those lines. But all that predicates on the idea that there is a goal they are trying to reach. I just never had a specific goal other than be the best version of your self.

It's hard to tell just from reading what someone writes, but yeah, burnout or boredom are what it superficially sounds like. As far as burnout vs. excuses, I don't think that's an either/or. People often make excuses IMO to rationalize a course of action that, in their heart of hearts, they know is a suboptimal course to take.

For sure, it's not "just getting old". That's a classic excuse. I think it's destructive (and inaccurate) to think of aging as something that inherently and necessarily slows us down, demotivates us, forcibly makes us weaker in ways we can't overcome, makes us fall apart cognitively, or anthing like that. Sure, there are some health conditions that become statistically more likely as we age, but we have some influence over the odds. Deciding that we're on some unavoidable course "because aging" is not just an excuse, but actually a slippery slope toward worse outcomes, sooner. Don't give yourself that cognitive out. (I'm 64 BTW, not some teenager saying this stuff.)

So, look around you. Are there people a decade or more older than you, maybe even older than that, that have been firmly in the kind of lifestyle you might be inclined to slip into? How does their life look to you? Good, healthy, happy . . . or not so much? Are they "their best selves"?

BTW: You've been motivated by "be your best self". Is this current you your best self? In all respects? (It sound pretty good, but . . . .). Only you can answer that.

I'm almost never a fan of telling people to shake up their routine . . . but that's in a context where they're generally happy with their routine but think they need to change it for some dumb reason like "body confusion". In your case, if there's an element of boredom or burnout, then shaking things up might be useful.

In that vein, some of those suggestions up there about trying some of the active VR gaming options (maybe offsetting a somewhat reduced daily step count?) might be something to consider. Or, if your gaming has a particular focus in this direction, you might want to take up a related real-life thing, like archery, 3-position rifle shooting, historical re-enacting, martial arts, etc.

For me, even though I'm not a high-social-needs person, I recognize that I'm influenced by the lifestyle norms of people I surround myself with. In my case, my biggest clusters of real-life friends are on-water rowers, and artists/craftspeople. If I get way too dug in with the crafty people, at the expense of time (and influence) with my athlete buddies, I start to feel like sitting around doing mixed-media arts projects is a pretty good, normal lifestyle, and I might as well eat some Taco Bell while I do it. (Exaggerating a little, maybe.) So, in my rowing off-season (or coronavirus season ) I'm pretty aware that I need some virtual or real influence from the active/athletic side. Even MFP participation or following health/fitness authorities I admire on social media provides a little bit of a counter-balance, reinforcing the idea that being active and eating healthy foods is also a good, normal lifestyle. I want some balance, some of each.

I don't know what your gamer-culture is like, but I'm guessing there's some social-media, chat, or other lifestyle-norming stuff going on around it. Rhetorical question: Is there, and what influence does it have on you? What life balance do you want? Are you surrounding yourself with influences to create that balance?

Well, that's way enough ramble.

TL;DR: Goals are optional. Think about what you enjoy, want for the future, what motivates you (not some random internet person). Figure out your inclinations and limitations, and game those to channel your behavior in directions you see as positive. Rinse and repeat.

Best wishes!