The Sober Squad- Alcohol Free Living

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Replies

  • Beka3695
    Beka3695 Posts: 4,126 Member
    whitpauly wrote: »
    Beka3695 wrote: »
    Ok... I'm back

    Just a reminder of my current situation -- I 'live' in North Georgia, but I'm currently residing in Pensacola, working remotely and nannying for my grandson. He is 4 months old and my daughter is in the military. Covid has made childcare non existent. Our calls last week were met with "we will possibly have openings in 2021." This has been my routine since mid May with no change in sight. I returned home last weekend and drove back to Florida yesterday.

    This past weekend SUCKED! I arrived home at like 11PM Friday and went straight to bed. Saturday I woke up to find my husband was already drinking.... This happened again Sunday. He was drunk or 'napping' all weekend long. It was quite miserable. Yesterday we met with our accountant and finally filed our taxes. Immediately after I left for Florida. About an hour out he called me - I could already hear alcohol on his voice. He apologized for the weekend. Honestly, this went in one ear and out the other bc I have heard these apologies so many times before. After the apology, he went on to say that he felt like he is ready to make a change. Said that seeing me and the transition I have made has made him want to be better. Said that he knows if he continues on the path he is on he will be dead in 10 years. He wants to see our grandson grow up.

    He has never made comments like these. He is not willing to seek professional help yet. This is not out of the question tho. He wants to see what he can do on his own before making that step.

    I am so hopeful that he will make a change. Even if not AF, less! I do think he is beyond the point of being able to quit cold turkey - the WDs would be too great without professional help.

    My goal now is to just be supportive. He needs to do this for himself, not me.

    Any advice is welcome.

    Is there any way he can taper down? I had to do that after drinking daily for 8 years straight! Just each day do less and less,also there's this herb called "kudzu" you can get it at any health food store or Amazon,it really curbed my need for alcohol in those days and I'd be shocked when I just didn't want to finish a beer,worth a shot anyways,hope everyone is well 💗

    This was part of our discussion yesterday. I suggested that however he approached needed to be a measurable method so he could monitor and SEE his progress.

    I’ll look up Kudzu. I wonder if it is the same as the vine that grows here??
  • RubyRed427
    RubyRed427 Posts: 4,155 Member
    Beka3695 wrote: »
    whitpauly wrote: »
    Beka3695 wrote: »
    Ok... I'm back

    Just a reminder of my current situation -- I 'live' in North Georgia, but I'm currently residing in Pensacola, working remotely and nannying for my grandson. He is 4 months old and my daughter is in the military. Covid has made childcare non existent. Our calls last week were met with "we will possibly have openings in 2021." This has been my routine since mid May with no change in sight. I returned home last weekend and drove back to Florida yesterday.

    This past weekend SUCKED! I arrived home at like 11PM Friday and went straight to bed. Saturday I woke up to find my husband was already drinking.... This happened again Sunday. He was drunk or 'napping' all weekend long. It was quite miserable. Yesterday we met with our accountant and finally filed our taxes. Immediately after I left for Florida. About an hour out he called me - I could already hear alcohol on his voice. He apologized for the weekend. Honestly, this went in one ear and out the other bc I have heard these apologies so many times before. After the apology, he went on to say that he felt like he is ready to make a change. Said that seeing me and the transition I have made has made him want to be better. Said that he knows if he continues on the path he is on he will be dead in 10 years. He wants to see our grandson grow up.

    He has never made comments like these. He is not willing to seek professional help yet. This is not out of the question tho. He wants to see what he can do on his own before making that step.

    I am so hopeful that he will make a change. Even if not AF, less! I do think he is beyond the point of being able to quit cold turkey - the WDs would be too great without professional help.

    My goal now is to just be supportive. He needs to do this for himself, not me.

    Any advice is welcome.

    Is there any way he can taper down? I had to do that after drinking daily for 8 years straight! Just each day do less and less,also there's this herb called "kudzu" you can get it at any health food store or Amazon,it really curbed my need for alcohol in those days and I

    I'd be shocked when I just didn't want to finish a beer,worth a shot anyways,hope everyone is well 💗

    This was part of our discussion yesterday. I suggested that however he approached needed to be a measurable method so he could monitor and SEE his progress.

    I’ll look up Kudzu. I wonder if it is the same as the vine that grows here??

    Have you asked your doctor for help? Naltraxone works wonders for those who are trying to quit. It was developed for opiod addiction but they have found it to be more effective for alcoholics. https://riahealth.com/2018/08/24/whats-it-like-to-drink-alcohol-while-on-naltrexone/
  • RubyRed427
    RubyRed427 Posts: 4,155 Member
    @Beka3695 Also, he seems isolated especially because you are babysitting; he needs a group or support system. It is so difficult to just do it all on his own with "willpower". His body and brain will definitely need to taper off so he doesn't get a seizure. Maybe he can reach out to a buddy who he knows reduced drinking ...

    I'm proud of you! And you look so young to be a grandmother <3
  • aroze0928
    aroze0928 Posts: 254 Member
    @Beka3695 what a sweet little guy. You look great too. I hope all works well with your husband. I can't offer any advice except that he has to want it.
    Im hoping for the same for my husband. But he doesn't even think he has a problem. Its a waiting game.
    Congrats @FeelinFooFoo on your streak!
  • Beka3695
    Beka3695 Posts: 4,126 Member
    Happy birthday @RubyRed427 !!!!

    Yes, this will be a better birthday
  • SunnyDays930
    SunnyDays930 Posts: 1,479 Member
    @RubyRed427 Such a beautiful painting! She gets her artistic talent from you!
  • lorrainequiche59
    lorrainequiche59 Posts: 900 Member
    Welcome @QueenZeelsm to our fantastic supportive group B)

    Yay @RubyRed427 Yay 90 days...your daughter's painting is lovely and the message inspiring! <3

    Congrats @FeelinFooFoo on your 31 day streak!! B)
  • lorrainequiche59
    lorrainequiche59 Posts: 900 Member
    @Beka3695 I'm wondering if your hubby would be willing to check out Craig Beck or Alcohol Mastery...it could give him a bit of a kick start into wrapping his mind around his alcohol issue and may be more in his comfort zone to listen to one of these guys or whoever else he may relate to...there is a ton of online help & I found YouTube to be a great resource for me in the early days of getting myself some help to change my drinking habit.

    Cute grandbaby...being a Granny is the BEST!! I'm sure it is difficult for you though to be in the role of caretaker & being away from your own home for so long. Hoping the best for you and smooch that wee baby & enjoy your time together <3
  • lorrainequiche59
    lorrainequiche59 Posts: 900 Member
    @donimfp No I didn't see the Thin Man films, but it seems that era was oblivious to the serious effects of the drink. We are so much more educated now in many ways, but denial is still the favorite tool of us who do not want to see the reality of stuff that is more difficult to face until we are ready to face it. Plain & simple.

    That is one thing in this group that I have always admired & appreciated is the honesty and willingness to be real in spite of whatever difficulties we may be facing individually...we keep it real here. <3