We broke up because...

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Replies

  • FabulousFantasticFifty
    FabulousFantasticFifty Posts: 195,833 Member
    She'd sleep till 3 in the afternoon
  • PaperDoll_
    PaperDoll_ Posts: 32,841 Member
    She didn’t understand that some of us need a little more beauty rest than others
  • brustmannzwei
    brustmannzwei Posts: 1,124 Member
    She didn’t understand that I found her beautiful just the way she was regardless of how much sleep she got. TBH, the less the better, that way I could pamper her by bringing her coffee and breakfast in bed, drawing a nice hot bubbly bath to soak in, yadda yadda yadda.
  • Cat0703a
    Cat0703a Posts: 17,414 Member
    He woke me up to make me bathe every morning at 3:45am but I wasn’t allowed coffee until I climbed back into bed at 5:03am.
  • toriann319
    toriann319 Posts: 994 Member
    One night her phone was ringing off the hook around 3:45am... She hopped out of bed, took a quick shower and ran out of the house yelling "GOTTA GO GET MY 5:03 COFFEE!!!!!".... and never came back...
  • brustmannzwei
    brustmannzwei Posts: 1,124 Member
    ^😮 if I had known she was two timing us I would have called shenanigans!

    We’ve been snookered!
  • toriann319
    toriann319 Posts: 994 Member
    brustmannzwei wrote: »
    ^😮 if I had known she was two timing us I would have called shenanigans!

    We’ve been snookered!

    I mean, I used to get snookered all the time but it was kind of our thing...... ;) Wait... Um... YEAH THE BETRAYAL!
  • mattig89ch
    mattig89ch Posts: 2,648 Member
    Never could understand her
  • Ransom_G
    Ransom_G Posts: 2,068 Member
    She was a cradle robber!
  • FabulousFantasticFifty
    FabulousFantasticFifty Posts: 195,833 Member
    I was a Cradle Robber aka Cougar ... Rawrrrrr! 😉
  • Cat0703a
    Cat0703a Posts: 17,414 Member
    She was always eyeing up the young men while we were out for date night.
  • FabulousFantasticFifty
    FabulousFantasticFifty Posts: 195,833 Member
    She wasn't a fan that I took " an "eye for an eye" literal 😜
  • CandycaneDimondSparkle
    CandycaneDimondSparkle Posts: 1,701 Member
    She wore too much red
  • FabulousFantasticFifty
    FabulousFantasticFifty Posts: 195,833 Member
    She said my Vintage looks were old , tired and ugly
  • PaperDoll_
    PaperDoll_ Posts: 32,841 Member
    She made me dress like a baby complete with diapers and a bib.
  • slimgirljo15
    slimgirljo15 Posts: 269,440 Member
    pooped her diaper and expected me to clean it :s
  • FabulousFantasticFifty
    FabulousFantasticFifty Posts: 195,833 Member
    That⤴️
    If I ever became paralyzed or something like, she'd fly the coop! 😧
  • BIG_FN_R0B
    BIG_FN_R0B Posts: 1,748 Member
    We didn't spoon enough
  • FabulousFantasticFifty
    FabulousFantasticFifty Posts: 195,833 Member
    Her spork was always stabbing me in the rush
    Ouch!! 😮
  • mattig89ch
    mattig89ch Posts: 2,648 Member
    Always carried a spork with her, never said why

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