30lbs to lose... Started AGAIN yesterday (Darn Lockdown Snacking)

Good morning, all. I read everything, every day, and if days go by with nothing from me is because I get into tied tongue periods. Never been the bubbly type, just (mostly) optimistic and recently realized that unnecessary and excessive drama (at work), negative people and lack of sleep, seriously drain me. Then my thoughts are just individual strings and somehow don’t seem to connect.

Barb -so happy to hear your scan went so well and your nodules are gone! It’s enormous good news for you, and the fact that you don’t need to worry for how they might progress in the future, has to be a big relief.
If baking makes you happy, go for it, but if it gives you anxiety and worries, postpone it until you get the good vibes.
The way you describe running is how I feel about walking/hiking, but because of very long work days, husband’s long commute, no family nearby, I did not work on it, nor carve time for it for many years. Would have been nice, but others were more important then. I’m catching up now, slowly.

Catherine- I am not sure if there is anything similar in my area for helping older or sick people. If it is, it’s not advertised well. Your stories of being helpful while getting some walking out off it, are funny. It’s how it always worked , but the exercise part seemed insignificant, or the 30 seconds talk with the neighbor, but now that we lost them, everything and everyone counts. It’s a good change, a very good one.
My version of that is : I drive a minivan and I park in the back of parking lots so I don’t have to squeeze in my seat - front of the store people park at an angle, because they are in a hurry 😁. I get 100 more steps, and I used to scoff at that, but now I’m proud. Everyone has dogs in the neighborhood and the waves across the street with 2 sentences are now borderline philosophical.

Katrina- two of my daughter’s friends are working towards becoming vets and I hear their stories (21 year olds) and I think, this is nothing, you should hear what my friend does - I don’t say that, mostly because is so much fun to hear what is a struggle for them, but also because they literally do not see me. To be that young!
So take good care of yourself and keep telling us stories, sister. I forgot to ask, where are you with the apartment renovations and the sell/move plans?

Catherine, I just think it’s marvelous how organized the effort is to make sure everyone has what they need. I keep hearing about the things Willam and Kate are doing and it seems like they are leading by example! I love all of their checking in with people throughout this whole ordeal and putting such a positive spin on looking out for one’s mental health- no stigma attached. I feel like they are doing some good! And I guess they just started their train trip around the UK to check in with people and thank health care workers. Is the response over there positive, or am I just reading all the feel good stuff on people.com???

I love how you are finding “excuses” to get in steps! Let us know if you get to connect with that friend for the walk this weekend! Sounds fun!

Gabi, I know what you mean about negative people at work draining you! I quit eating lunch in the teachers’ lounge because the conversation was always so negative. It was almost like a contest to see who could complain the most. I started eating in the classroom and even managed to get a few things done in the process. Negativity is definitely contagious, but not something we want to catch!
So you like hiking, too!?! I LOVE hiking! We have some really nice ridges around here to climb! Being out in nature really soothes the soul, doesn’t it?

“Everyone has dogs in the neighborhood and the waves across the street with 2 sentences are now borderline philosophical.”
That is SERIOUSLY funny!!! You should send that in to one of the late night comedy hosts!!

My mom always did the same thing you do, park far away from the entrance of the store so she could get her steps in.

So sorry to hear about your dog’s seizures. What kind is he? Let us know how he’s doing! Your daughter is very brave and devoted. I’m impressed! I’m sure she did need a major nap after that emotionally draining time and cutting into her sleep time as well!

*****
All of you, NEVER feel like you have to respond to every little thing, every day!! I do not want this to become a burden in any way! I just want us to share our ups and downs and encourage each other. It shouldn’t be one more thing that keeps you from getting to bed on time! I just want you to post ANYTHING at all every couple of days, so we know you are okay! I couldn’t care less if it’s weight or food related! Your weight is just a NUMBER- it’s not WHO you are!

Katrina, I KNOW you are crazy busy with those animals! I can’t imagine that kind of responsibility! Luckily, teaching school, the kids’ health didn’t depend on me! ( except once when a kindergartener came to school sick on a Monday. I called his Mom at 10:30 and told her to come get him and take him to the dr. She said he had an appt the following Monday. I said that would be too late, take him anyway. She did and they admitted him to the hospital for a week of antibiotics thru a PICC line and then he came back to school with the line still in! Talk about pressure-making sure no one jostled him and the line got pulled out! Was glad when that year ended! So I couldn’t take the pressure of dealing with major issues every day!)

My day:
Exercise: ✅ ( so COLD jogging!)
Tracked: ✅
Under: ✅ no biscuits today!

Got the email. Was out at 630 today, stopped by the store thats actually on my way home to pick up asparagus whic was the only thing the other store yesterday didnt have. Ended up getting some other things i probably didn't need... ate too much today but with the calories burned from my day it wasnt awful. No i didn't walk sunday, i was sucked into a crochet project. Made a hat for mats mom and started working on a matching scarf. I still dont really feel like walking any sort of vigorously. Fine post flu shot, but just don't think i would feel good walking briskly yet. The cough is fading but still hanging on.

Barb congrats on the thyroid improvement! My grandma had hers out due to cancer so i try to make sure i wear the thyroid guard when taking xrays now (used to forget a lot). My coworker had hers out too.

Catherine its good to give yourself excuses to move. Hope you enjoy the visit with a friend.

Gabi so sorry about your pup. Hope bloodwork is normal and meds work well for the pupper.

Going to bed now. Did a healthy amount of just watching my fish tonight and relaxing, but i do need to get my hands in the tanks to trim plants etc. Perhaps tomorrow. Also have to cook some food in my fridge. Goodnight all!

I’m no feeling too chatty today. Found out my daughter ( the one who is struggling with pandemic depression)has to put her cat to sleep tomorrow. Tears my heart out.
He had osteo sarcoma about 5 years ago, had a leg amputated, and has done great until right after thanksgiving. No kidney function, no red blood cells, some sort of mass in his lungs. I will be driving to Raleigh in the morning. Hope I can keep it together!
Katrina, I don’t know how you can stand it when you have to put an animal to sleep! I’d be a wreck! I AM a wreck!

Exercise: ✅
Tracked; ✅
Under: ✅

It’s going to be tough not to eat my feelings the next several days!

Made it home before 7 pm! Still felt like a really long day. I finally called my dr today to ask when i should worry about this stupid residual cough. She said give it a week or two more and if its still hanging around to make an appointment. Gonna try to walk on the treadmill after I cook some dinner and see what I feel like. Not much else to say today, but didn't wanna update at 10 when I'm trying to go to sleep. Have to work Saturday this week, but just two more days...

Got through today. The only thing worse than saying good bye to a beloved pet is watching your daughter have her heart torn in 2! She’s 26. The last cat she had before Joey, died when she was in 7th grade and she cried EVERY day for a YEAR! So sad to see her go through this again.

Katrina, I don’t know how you do what you do, I really don’t! I’d need to be committed after one week of being a vet and having to euthanize more than one pet!

Gabi, Hoorah for getting in and out of Costco without a long wait! And you had the energy for a bike ride afterward!?! Unbelievable!
Let’s not gloss over the fact you were able to tune out the unnecessary stuff at work! That’s something!
Never beat yourself up for a lazy day! Just move right on!! It could be worse, you could be compulsive about it like me!

Didn’t give into eating my feelings today. If I had, I’d still be eating! Can’t say I won’t give in tomorrow though.

Exercise:✅ (did an extra workout before bed last night and then did a few weights this morning before my long drive. See what I mean about being compulsive!?!
Tracked:✅
Under: ✅

Catherine, how are things?

Barb - years ago my coworker came in one morning with red nose and puffy eyes, and said she cried all evening because XX broke off with her daughter. And when I said that she didn’t even like XX , her answer was that she didn’t cry for him, she cried WITH her daughter. And that’s the truth, we do hurt if we see them hurt. So sorry for your daughter going through this.

Catherine- sorry to hear it was a hard week, but ultra glad you’re back. The class is for dealing with suicidal colleagues, right? Tough. Info must be so intense, and pray you never need to apply it, but I admire you for choosing it.
Prayers to your father to get stronger.

I had to go at work today because of a crisis and it was so weird because we had the department Christmas lunch, with food from Mission Barbecue . I couldn’t eat anything they got, so I just went at my desk and worked on my issue. Half a year ago I would have been thinking about the food outside my door the entire time, smell it and getting obsessed with it. Now, nothing.
I didn’t eat anything before going in, and at 3 when I left, I still wasn’t hungry so I stopped at a store and got my daughter more puzzles - this is our family obsession now, since the pandemic, and we were running out.

izzyred9400 wrote: »

Hi,
You sound like you're doing really well.Its hard to diet when you're feeding kids all day.Been there,done it.I have also gained 20lbs since lockdown.I now weigh the same as last time I joined MFP in feb 2018 !! Would like to add u as a friend but don't know how ??
Keep up the good work,you're doing great 😁

To add someone as a friend, you click on their name, then click on their name again. Then you can send a friend request.

Feel free to add me as a friend!

Gabi - all kinds of mental health problems, but the session on suicide was the toughest one. It took more out of me than I expected. Still, I do feel better equipped and it was worthwhile doing.

Smelling delicious food and not eating all the delicious food takes some serious willpower! Go you!

Barb - no idea. It's a bit of a stupid thing to be sad about, because I'm so far down the UK's priority list there may not be any left of that particular vaccine when my group gets called up. As a country, we've bought a few different types and it's a long wait until my turn. However, I guess I didn't realise how much hope I'd been pinning to a vaccine to magically make life 'normal' again.

I've always been quite well-behaved on the grounds that it won't be forever, and it struck me all at once that I might never get a vaccine and if that's true, it makes me so vulnerable. Work still want us to come back in January (they clearly haven't read the guidance that working from home is recommended until April at least), but we're about to enter a worse level in my city, and I'm expecting another proper lockdown after Christmas. Whatever they're planning will get pushed back, I'm sure.

The higher ups hate remote working, and it's got me thinking, would I quit if they forced the point? I don't think I'll get to a 'come in or resign' standoff until the summer, but there is a moment coming. It might be time to start researching which companies are more open to permanent home working, and to get a back up plan lined up. If I have to rely on herd immunity rather than getting vaccinated, I don't want my old commute back.

There is also the possibility of doing something else for a pay cut, if it enables me to work from home or work more locally. It is something I could manage, especially given I'm no longer blowing a chunk of my disposable salary on takeout. However... if I have a drop in salary, it makes sending money to my sister harder, and she's still out of work.

Lots to mull over as we enter a New Year!

@StephanieStC Welcome!

Have you been homeschooling throughout? Here in the UK, the kids have been back at school for a while now, although they do keep getting sent home as their 'bubbles' keep bursting.

What are your weight/health goals and how long have you been on this journey? Are you just getting started, or have you been doing this for a while now?

Catherine,

I understand your frustration with the vaccine situation. It is so disappointing when we think we see the light at the end of the tunnel and it turns out it was not light after all. At least I think by late spring things will be looking up. Where I am we have greatly increasing number of cases, hospitalizations and deaths, setting new records, sometimes several times in a week. Not something we want to be setting records in. I’ve gotten to the point where I won’t go in a grocery or anywhere in public without wearing my N95, which fits very snuggly all around.
So now anyone who’s had a severe allergic reaction to anything shouldn’t receive the new vaccine. That means both my daughters would not be able to get it. They’ve both required epinephrine due to allergic reactions. One of them has asthma. Hopefully the Moderna vaccine will be approved soon and that will be an option.
I agree, it’s hard to stay optimistic at times during all this! What’s hard for me is knowing we are doing our part and then seeing people ignore the mask mandate, gather in large groups etc. They go on business as usual and the virus keeps spreading. If we could’ve ALL done our part, we could’ve gotten things under control a LONG time ago!


You have a lot to think about and consider for your job situation. I hear some companies are embracing the whole work from home scenario as it actually cuts down on their overhead. You are an amazing sister, giving her money while she’s out of work.

Did you get to take that walk with a friend?


Gabi, You messed up calorie wise for one day, not a big deal. The fact that you owned it, but are determined just to move on without the whole guilt thing shows you are truly making progress! That’s AWESOME!

Katrina, How are you doing?


I didn’t go over on calories today, but definitely indulged in too many treats! Had a socially distanced birthday celebration with my sister. We got take out and ate in a nearby park, with our chairs about 15 feet apart( my sister, my daughter, and me). We shared a lot of laughs as well as the treats. Laughter goes a long way during this unsettling time!

Exercise:✅
Tracked: ✅
Under: ✅