What was your final push to get serious?

This year for some reason has me down in the dumps farthest I've ever been. Just do not feel like my self any more and the only thing making me happy lately is food. With no motivation what-so ever to workout. October 11th I tested positive for Covid-19, Doctor told me to go home and sit on my behind till it passes and that I shouldn't worry to much because I'm 22 and in okay shape. Hearing her say that did not help me, my anxiety about having it and I had all flu like symptoms i just was terrified this was going to get worse.

For me when I have anxiety or that feeling of no control I make toxic choices and go on horrible binges. My work closed, I'm in my room cant leave my bedroom because I still live at home with my dad. I start ordering so much food. Started with Cracker Barrel, then Taco Bell, Cold Stone, McDonald's you Mcfreaking name it I ordered it all. The funny thing is about day 3 of being in my room I LOST MY TASTE AND SMELL. Yeah so mid Cracker Barrel pancake I realize I cant taste a damn thing and through that 12 days I still ordered food and shoved my face. That is when I realized this is a problem and I'm not even eating because I enjoy the taste or because I'm hungry I'm eating because of anxiety and boredom. I have acted this way for as long as i can remember. So its time to quit and I re downloaded the MyFitnessPal app went premium and I'm sticking to it this time.

For me, it was the diagnosis of Type 2 Diabetes back in January. At the time I had been 'yo-yo'ing for years between 290 and 260. At the time of diagnosis I was at 265lbs and my A1C was 9.7 with a random sugar reading of mid 20's. Being 51 I knew this was the time to smarten up and live better or keep on living the way I was and leave my family suffering through my early demise. I am happy to say that by July I had dropped 65 lbs to 200 and had cut my A1C in half, dropping it to 4.7 in a six month span. I've eased up some on the weight loss but have still dropped another 11 lbs since then and am sitting at 189 lbs with a BMI that for the first time since I was a teenager is under 25. At one time my BMI had reached 39!

I started my most recent weight loss journey October 18, 2009. 2 days earlier I had gone to the Cleveland Clinic for intractable burning pain throughout my body due to MS. I was told that a pain pump could be inserted into my spine, but I needed to be under 300# for them to do it. I cried the whole way home from Cleveland to a little town just south of Erie, PA. You see, I weighed close to 360 pounds at the time. I already had weight loss surgery back in 1995, and had gained almost everything back. 2 days later I found another weight loss site and my journey began. I did not think I'd be successful, not without a revision, but I had to try.

The above is on my MFP intro. Now, 11 years later, I am about 145 pounds lighter. I gained and lost over those years, but I always "got back on the horse". This is a journey that for me will last a lifetime.

bertoroe wrote: »

I still struggle with the commitment, mostly because I feel very lost in all of this. Not necessarily out of information, I think, because I've done the research to a degree. But because I struggle with validation and feel that if I'm not seeing results I'm probably doing it wrong lol.

I got back into it because I realize my health is getting worse, but I have always been in it for the self-esteem. It's been a very long journey, I'm just hoping that I keep going from here.

You sound like you (I hate to use this term as it seems excessive but it’s true) “suffer” from Body Dysmorphia.

That’s when you see something different in the mirror than others see. At about 50 pounds down, I was extremely frustrated because I saw the same fat chick in the mirror.

What really helped me was at that point someone (in my case my trainer) taking weekly photos and video of me.

It really messed with my head seeing visual proof of someone who looked completely different than the person I saw in the mirror.

It took a while but it truly helped and I am very grateful she insisted (still does, religiously) doing it.

Even now, I still occasionally “feel” or “look” fat. I am not enamored of looking at myself in the mirror, but I make myself model in front of it every morning to remind myself I am no longer that person, and to be grateful of and honor myself for where I’ve come from.

It’s still very, very hard, after years of disliking and criticizing that mirror image to come to grips that it’s OK to like myself again.

Hugs to you. Don’t give up. Get validation.

I weighed in at my heaviest (211) at 5'7" and was diagnosed with Stage II hypertension. If I let my blood pressure stay high I could have a stroke or heart attack at any minute.. I'm 29. I have finally decided to take control of my health and make this a slow and realistic journey. The weight loss benefits from lifestyle changes will be nice but the main thing that is motivating me is my health.

My sister died.
She was only 45. She left behind a shattered husband and 3 preteen girls. This just happened in October.
She was morbidly obese. Her BMI was over 50. She had been having heart problems for a year and was on a bunch of medications for it, plus meds for fibromyalgia, IBS, and depression.
Her heart just stopped. The coroner's report said: sudden cardiac arrest due to heart disease caused by obesity.
The thing is -- she was the most joyful, beautiful, funny, smart, and kind person I knew. She wasn't just a "fat person". She was overflowing with life! She loved movies, especially Disney and Pixar. She loved food. She loved to bake awesome cakes and desserts for her friends' birthdays. She loved to laugh. She was busy all the time, except when pain kept her inside, and even then she was on her phone chatting with her hundreds of friends. Over 2,000 people attended her virtual funeral.
We all had told her she needed to lose weight, that she was getting "too heavy". My other sister and I have also struggled with obesity. We were raised to "clean our plates" and Dad always insisted there was dessert after dinner. Our rewards were always food-based -- cookies, candy, Dairy Queen, McDonald's.
My sister wanted to lose weight but she was in so much pain, it was hard to start. It was a horrible cycle that ultimately led to her death.
Please tell my sister's story to yourself or anyone who is overweight and struggling with staying on track. She was beautiful and loved so much. She was such a bright light and now she is gone. Please realize that NOW is the time to lose the weight, no matter what. Your children need you. Your spouse needs you. Your sister needs you. Please don't think you have more time because maybe you don't.

CeeGu wrote: »

My sister died.
She was only 45. She left behind a shattered husband and 3 preteen girls. This just happened in October.
She was morbidly obese. Her BMI was over 50. She had been having heart problems for a year and was on a bunch of medications for it, plus meds for fibromyalgia, IBS, and depression.
Her heart just stopped. The coroner's report said: sudden cardiac arrest due to heart disease caused by obesity.
The thing is -- she was the most joyful, beautiful, funny, smart, and kind person I knew. She wasn't just a "fat person". She was overflowing with life! She loved movies, especially Disney and Pixar. She loved food. She loved to bake awesome cakes and desserts for her friends' birthdays. She loved to laugh. She was busy all the time, except when pain kept her inside, and even then she was on her phone chatting with her hundreds of friends. Over 2,000 people attended her virtual funeral.
We all had told her she needed to lose weight, that she was getting "too heavy". My other sister and I have also struggled with obesity. We were raised to "clean our plates" and Dad always insisted there was dessert after dinner. Our rewards were always food-based -- cookies, candy, Dairy Queen, McDonald's.
My sister wanted to lose weight but she was in so much pain, it was hard to start. It was a horrible cycle that ultimately led to her death.
Please tell my sister's story to yourself or anyone who is overweight and struggling with staying on track. She was beautiful and loved so much. She was such a bright light and now she is gone. Please realize that NOW is the time to lose the weight, no matter what. Your children need you. Your spouse needs you. Your sister needs you. Please don't think you have more time because maybe you don't.

That's a really powerful story: I can feel the heart in it, right through the screen. Deep sympathies to you and your family for your loss.

I don't even know my weight yet because I'm afraid to get on a scale. This year, with Covid lockdowns, I feel as if I've been sitting around way too much, nibbling constantly. I also quit smoking and I'm sure that has led to weight gain as well. My clothes are too tight. I won't buy up another size. My hips and knees hurt, but they hurt less when I get up and walk or go for a bike ride. I've worked hard this year to avoid Covid, to quit smoking, to give up caffeine and sugar... so that tells me I actually do care about my health. Now I need to take it up a few notches, so I can fit into nice clothes, so I can keep up with my grandchildren next summer, and so I will feel better overall.