Thank you for ignoring me! I lost 11 pounds.

2

Replies

  • TheHappyLoser
    TheHappyLoser Posts: 95 Member
    solieco1 wrote: »
    Wow. That has got to be the most passive aggressive post I have ever read and completely devoid of any consideration of what your friends may be doing or going through or God forbid working. A little Grace goes a long way. When I post a loss yes, I like the wonderful encouragement but I also post it to give others perhaps a boost that we are all in this together. Congratulations on the 11 pounds and I looked at your profile and the reasons you want to lose weight - sound like great reasons. Perhaps go with those. Very best of Luck to you.

    Sadly, you are assuming wrong. I did consider the fact that people might be as busy as I am. Or new and are trying to figure it all out. That day my newsfeed was full. Messages, pictures, updates, lots of them had nothing to do with weight loss or fitness. Inspirational quotes, motivation, sharing of struggles. A few hahas. I would have never felt left out on an empty newsfeed. I felt left out and it ignored because it was so busy.
  • janejellyroll
    janejellyroll Posts: 25,763 Member
    Hey! I also commented on your status update but I think Captcha ate it? It's absolutely not personal - I rarely scroll through my whole newsfeed, I'll Like the first 10-15 status updates I see (usually just streak/weight loss updates, I don't care so much about the "so and so is now friends with what's her face" or "what's her face completed her diary" updates), but stop scrolling at that point and do whatever I logged on to the site/app to do. I didn't wake up this morning and think "I'm going to ignore TheHappyLoser's incredible progress specifically, on purpose, to hurt her feelings." Nobody did. We just didn't see it right away. FWIW I had to scroll down and load about 5 more pages of status updates to even see your weigh-in (which I then Liked). You're doing amazing, just try not to take social media so personally and you'll be so much the better for it.

    This is a good point. From what I've heard, lots of people are getting captchas when they're trying to comment on newsfeeds and it's curbing some interactions at the moment. Even people who would otherwise comment might not be at the moment.
  • solieco1
    solieco1 Posts: 1,559 Member
    edited March 2021
    solieco1 wrote: »
    Wow. That has got to be the most passive aggressive post I have ever read and completely devoid of any consideration of what your friends may be doing or going through or God forbid working. A little Grace goes a long way. When I post a loss yes, I like the wonderful encouragement but I also post it to give others perhaps a boost that we are all in this together. Congratulations on the 11 pounds and I looked at your profile and the reasons you want to lose weight - sound like great reasons. Perhaps go with those. Very best of Luck to you.

    Sadly, you are assuming wrong. I did consider the fact that people might be as busy as I am. Or new and are trying to figure it all out. That day my newsfeed was full. Messages, pictures, updates, lots of them had nothing to do with weight loss or fitness. Inspirational quotes, motivation, sharing of struggles. A few hahas. I would have never felt left out on an empty newsfeed. I felt left out and it ignored because it was so busy.

    Hugs <3 and good luck as you continue
  • lacylucy1935
    lacylucy1935 Posts: 70 Member
    Don't rely on FB for support, you got this! I do not like to comment on much due to the fact I had one friend feel hurt because she didn't see me wish her Happy Anniversary. Now I usually do not because I am afraid I will hurt someone's feeling and to me that is not what FB is about.
    This is about how you feel and what you have done! Great work, keep it up!
  • ginamyrmel
    ginamyrmel Posts: 70 Member
    I do know how you feel; I don't have many friends, but when I'm excited about something, I thought they'd respond, but not normally. So, I share my successes with in-person friends. I'm feeling lonely some days, but I use MFP to log my food and that's where it helps.
  • Diatonic12
    Diatonic12 Posts: 32,344 Member
    @TheHappyLoser

    Then why be a friend or have friends if you don't participate or don't expect anybody to participate?


    Doggone it. I can feel you coming right through this question. It touched me. We're here and we care. Some show it more than others. There are pros who do a really great job of responding back on the personal home page. They're very considerate, thoughtful and full of daily encouragement.

    I've started a thread on chitchat where I can just mill around and shoot the breeze with the Universe. Understood and appreciated, you wanted some friends.

    You don't have to play any games to find long term stability with weight. Don't let feelings drive your behaviors going forward, you want your new behaviors to stick. Feelings are fickle. We have to dig deep and discover why we really want a change and that will give you resolve to carry on come hail or high water - with or without any friends.

    Pain is the precursor to change. When the pain of staying the same becomes greater than staying the same it stokes our passion to make lasting changes. Going forward you can resolve to be a better friend to those who are struggling because you've walked down this road. It is a lonesome road and we have to walk it mostly all by ourselves because there is no shortcut to lasting weight loss.

    You've resolved to put in the work. When we turn the pain or the loneliness into ACTION we can use as fuel to keep us moving forward waaaaay into the future. Use it. Stay fierce and unstoppable and you'll be picking UP friends who are struggling alongside the road. You'll know how to be there for them.


  • brenn24179
    brenn24179 Posts: 2,144 Member
    you can delete all of them (wish I could do this in real life, lol) and start adding new friends. Congrats on your weight loss.
  • Zinka61
    Zinka61 Posts: 522 Member
    edited March 2021
    Congratulations on your great loss, and yes, lose the unsupportive friends and keep looking until you find more like the 3 good ones you have! They are out there! Supportive friends are the main thing that motivates me--They are worth their weight in gold! If people aren't interacting with me, I delete them very quickly. For a lot of us, when it comes to friends, it quality over quantity so we can manage to be present for those on our friends list. Otherwise what is the point of having friends at all? You deserve better!
  • TheHappyLoser
    TheHappyLoser Posts: 95 Member
    edited March 2021
    tuddy315 wrote: »
    I felt the same way when I sent you a personal message and you didn't read or respond to it.
    Ddsb11 wrote: »
    This post strikes me as someone needing some kind of counseling or therapy. Your tone is lacking any personal responsibility or compassion for other people. I hope that you can remove your expectations from complete strangers and find peace with yourself on your journey.

    I assume a woman who feels the need to use an avatar like yours on a public health and weight loss page, must know a thing or two about therapy.

    You don't seem very "Happy" to me.

    I got two messages today, neither one was from you. Maybe it didn't go through?
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