Can't get motivated for wedding!

It's 11 weeks until our wedding, and when it was meant to be last May, I had done well and lost a stone. But then lockdown happened and I put on weight again. I know that I need to start now, but for the life of me I can't get motivated at all. My partner is motivated now but it's not rubbing off! Can anyone suggest any films to watch/blogs to read that might help give me a kick up the bum, please?!

Replies

  • lmf1012
    lmf1012 Posts: 402 Member
    Go visit wedding photographer websites and look at the brides in their gowns... maybe that will inspire you?
  • Lhenderson923
    Lhenderson923 Posts: 102 Member
    I think you need to figure out why you want to lose weight. Is it just because you’re “supposed to” before your wedding? Is it for the photos? Or is it because you want to be healthier long term? All of these things may require different motivation. Secondary to this, you can’t always rely on motivation for weight loss. It all comes down to dedication. You will not feel motivated every day, and if that is all you have to rely on, then your goal will be much harder to reach.
  • Lietchi
    Lietchi Posts: 6,034 Member
    Just to be comfortable in your dress, I presume you don't need to lose a lot? I would recommend the slow, gradual approach, which doesn't require tons of motivation.
    Just start by logging your food for a few days, perhaps a week, without making changes to what you eat.
    If you're currently not exercising, perhaps set a small exercise goal, for example: take a 30-minute walk each day, or do a 15 minute exercise video each day.
    After a week or so, you can start decreasing your calorie intake a bit by making some small changes: slightly smaller portions, or perhaps less snacks, or replacing some high calorie foods by slightly lower calorie alternatives. No major overhaul, just tweaks. I'd choose a weight loss rate of 0.5lbs per week (or perhaps 1lb, certainly no more than that).
    And you can inrease your exercise slightly, if you feel like it. It's not strictly necessary for weight loss, but for me exercise gets my mind in the right attitude, I feel better about myself and more motivated to take good care of myself.

    With this gradual approach, you don't need a huge amount of motivation or willpower, and it won't add a lot of stress to your life on top of the stress from preparing the wedding. It will also give a good base to continue after the wedding. Much better than overhauling your diet completely to look good for the wedding and then going back to your old habits and gaining back the weight.

    PS: I would call it inspiration instead of motivation, but the Success Stories section of the forums are a great place to explore!
  • csplatt
    csplatt Posts: 988 Member
    are you happy at your current size but feel like brides are “supposed” to focus on dropping sizes?
  • SnifterPug
    SnifterPug Posts: 746 Member
    Well, others have made very good points. But for practical purposes, you are very unlikely to be able to get another dress sorted in the time available (even if you wanted to). Unless the current dress can be altered you are kind of stuck with trying to shed a bit of weight because, photos aside, you want to be comfortable on your wedding day.

    Forget motivation - it never lasts anyway. Make a sensible plan that you can stick to, and then just.do.it. You may find the 11 weeks gets you into a mindset where you want to continue after the wedding. You may not. But you have enough time on your side to be able to shed weight in a sensible manner.

    Good luck!
  • Speakeasy76
    Speakeasy76 Posts: 961 Member
    I found that whenever I felt I "needed" to lose a certain amount of weight, it would totally stress me out and it would backfire. I actually did lose some weight before my wedding, but did it by focusing on strength training and not so much about my diet (the exercise part has always been pretty easy for me to form a habit). I didn't lose as much as I wanted to, but I was smaller as my dress needed to be altered.

    Even though I wasn't technically overweight when I got married, I weigh more than 20 pounds LESS than I did when I got married...14 years and 2 kids later! It's because: 1. I focused on eating better and doing it for my overall health and 2. I didn't put any pressure on myself to do it by a certain date. This was a LIFETIME thing, not just about looking good for a certain event...although I know most brides want to look as good as possible for their weddings!

    Do I look at my wedding pictures and sometimes wish I was as muscular and smaller then as I am now--if I'm being honest, yes. However, it took me YEARS of smart strength training to reach this level, and trust me, I'm still not done.
  • Wombat468
    Wombat468 Posts: 191 Member
    Thank you all so much! I'm going to take a good read of these and get started!
  • Wombat468
    Wombat468 Posts: 191 Member
    csplatt wrote: »
    are you happy at your current size but feel like brides are “supposed” to focus on dropping sizes?

    No, definitely not happy m