Am I the only one who hates it when people tell me I've lost
kittenmitton
Posts: 231 Member
Maybe I'm crazy, but I can't stand it when people tell me I've lost weight. I normally just say yes and change the topic quickly, but what I really want to say is "oh, really? I didn't even notice losing 90 pounds. How strange."
Maybe it's just because I have a completely messed up family. My "grandmother" (I use that term in the loosest way possible. Biologically she's my grandmother, but in every other sense of the word she's not) never once told me I was beautiful until I lost a bunch of weight. None of my "relatives" on that side of the family barely even noticed I existed until I dropped 90 pounds. Now, all of a sudden, I'm thin, so it's ok for them to be seen with me (it's odd though, because most of them are bigger than I ever was). I guess that's why I hate being told I've lost weight, but it just makes me really uncomfortable when people point it out. I mean, I don't want to go back to how I used to be at all, of course, but I just hate it when people say something about my weight. I guess it makes me think that's the only thing people care about when that's the first thing someone says to me...Anyways, I'm rambling.
So am I alone in this, or does it make anyone else uncomfortable when people tell you you've lost weight?
Maybe it's just because I have a completely messed up family. My "grandmother" (I use that term in the loosest way possible. Biologically she's my grandmother, but in every other sense of the word she's not) never once told me I was beautiful until I lost a bunch of weight. None of my "relatives" on that side of the family barely even noticed I existed until I dropped 90 pounds. Now, all of a sudden, I'm thin, so it's ok for them to be seen with me (it's odd though, because most of them are bigger than I ever was). I guess that's why I hate being told I've lost weight, but it just makes me really uncomfortable when people point it out. I mean, I don't want to go back to how I used to be at all, of course, but I just hate it when people say something about my weight. I guess it makes me think that's the only thing people care about when that's the first thing someone says to me...Anyways, I'm rambling.
So am I alone in this, or does it make anyone else uncomfortable when people tell you you've lost weight?
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Replies
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I smile and thank whoever said it. I've only lost 20 lbs and never had a real weight issue, so I have a different perspective.
Something to consider: a person's weight is one of the most obvious things to notice about them, with hair style being the other. If someone notices a difference and comments, try to realize that they are trying to pay you a compliment. Losing weight is not an easy thing to do, and most people realize this. So too say it to someone is sort of like saying, "Hey, look at you! You have done a great thing! You've figured out how to beat the odds and lose weight! That's no easy task! Good job!"
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I don't think people are saying that you've lost weight to be mean. As long as they associated with you before as much as afterwards (which is apparently not the case with your family), and genuinely seem happy for you, then they're probably just noticing that your hard work has paid off. Most genuinely nice people mean it as a compliment, and in my opinion, it should be taken as that and nothing more.
For me, it's awesome when people compliment my weight loss because I'm a vain MF'er, but I digress.0 -
I guess my issue is that I know my "relatives" aren't being sincere, nor are they complimenting me when they say it. It's almost like it's their way of saying "oh, you're socially acceptable now." I think that's why I have a hard time accepting it when well-meaning people say it...0
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I love it when people notice. It makes me feel more confident that this is actually working!!!!0
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Fair enough. Maybe if more genuine people say it, you'll stop associating the compliment with your douchey relatives.
Therefore: You really have lost weight. And look great.0 -
Ugh, I know EXACTLY how you feel. In addition to that, I also hate "Oh you look great!" What, like I was butt ugly before? You're right, it IS as if some people are really saying "You're of an acceptable appearance now".0
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For me, it's awesome when people compliment my weight loss because I'm a vain MF'er, but I digress.
That should say, " vain MFP'er"0
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