smolmaus Member

Well your body has changed but you still have the same brain and patterns of self criticism aren't sucked away with weight loss. It's a very common phenomenon for people to look back on old photos of themselves and think "wow I looked amazing, why did I used to think I was ugly/ fat etc." I know I have been critical of my…

Massively mischaracterising what I said there. "I hate when people don't take the sick leave they're entitled to" is not "I hate people who come to work sick". When people don't take what they're entitled to it contributes to a culture where other people are then expected not to take it. It's an excuse for companies to…

I worked at a university for two years (PhD studies) and professors are, and should be replaceable and definitely take sick days. I know there are 3-4 faculty members off on long term sick due to stress right now in that department (because my partner works there now) and their classes are being taught by others using…

That thought does help me though. I'm not in America but I have felt bad about taking sick days I needed before. When I got back the world hadn't ended, I wasn't as important as I thought I was. Someone else had held down the fort or contractors accepted they would get their stuff the next day. Delays happen all the time…

I doubt it was effortless the first time. Your brain plays tricks on you that way. You probably don't remember the same stage from the last time because so much has happened since, including obviously a lot of success. I'm doing the same thing right now, getting back into the gym in the mornings and wondering how I used to…

Can relate! I was actually talking to my dad about this last night. He has an app on his phone that he can go to when he's feeling stressed or anxious and it asks you questions, one of which is "what would you advise someone else to do in this situation?" and for him, having to write that down and engage with the idea (not…

This makes me sad. I'm sorry you felt that way at such a young age. Same. Well, past me was the same I have to poke around for a rib at the minute. Some (most) women just aren't built for catwalk bambi legs and a thigh gap and there's no point trying to teach elephants to climb trees. Clothes not fitting right is a thing I…

This little phrase is delightful :3 I honestly think that if deadlines are so tight that a project falls apart because of one employee taking a sick day that's a failure on the part of management. That's a risk the company is taking by trying to run on a skeleton crew. My job is fine with paid sick (and I have ceoliac so…

I just think it's a polite thing to do if you're sick and have to go outside. Very common in other parts of the world, just not where I am. Also; they make little cotton ones with cat mouths on them and I want one (I am a responsible adult I swear)

I hate people not taking sick days they're entitled to. You don't get paid more for being infectious and it creates an expectation for other people not to take sick days who need them. With the gym tho, I know it's filthy no matter how clean it seems. So long as there's no one with bubonic plague I won't change my…

I agree that these are important things to tell a therapist or medical professional. In the short term, nobody is forcing you to weigh yourself. Just don't. If you feel good then count that as a measure of success, it means a lot more. If your old pattern was weigh-panic-binge-restrict then cutting out the first step can't…

Is the exercise a new thing? That can cause water retention which can temporarily mask weight loss. Or, are you sure you're actually eating what you think you are? Are you weighing solids with a scale (yes) or eyeballing things (please no)? If you know you're eating at a deficit you know you will be losing weight but you…

I am also 5'2" with an office job. Neither of us need to eat <1000kcal to lose weight. You might feel okay now but your body will not be having a good time and for most people it catches up to them eventually. Maybe with fatigue, thinning hair, bad skin or just losing all control and eating whatever you can get your hands…

If he wants to revamp his way of eating then the best thing you can do for him is let him handle it himself. Get him to do the research. Ask him what low carb alternatives he would like to swap in for his rice etc. If you do all this for him he won't learn a single thing about eating for long term weight management. Part…

Ceoliac? Because that's me too. As a child I couldn't gain weight if I tried. I used to eat as much as the grown men in the family and be hungry in 90 minutes so my hunger and fullness signals are very very broken. Once I was diagnosed and puberty hit I stopped getting the "look at you, you're so skinny" comments which…

You're eating at most 800kcal per day? There is absolutely no need to do that unless you have been instructed by a doctor and are under their supervision. How long has the scale been stalled? If it's been more than a week or two then the chances are you are eating more than you think because no adult alive can maintain…

I used to get up every morning and make my own guacamole, on toast with two scrambled eggs. Breakfast of queens. I've swapped the avo out for sauteed red onion, mushrooms and spinach because avocados are expensive if you go through 3-4 a week but I might treat myself this weekend :)

Absolutely, I agree with you. I just think the mental issues (disordered eating, yo-yo dieting, possible life-long weird relationships with food) are more important than any potential hormonal damage. Which we don't even know is significant. I didn't say don't worry about anything. We are advising the same thing just with…

I appreciate this. I dropped out of my PhD due to depression and when people go on about what a shame it was I feel just as sick as when I got comments about my weight gain. To OP: I absolutely agree with everyone saying that this is exactly the thing your referral to a therapist is for. Comments by other people are…

I never find I enjoy McDonalds as much as I think I'm going to. Fast food is cheap and quick but I wouldn't think of it as an indulgence in terms of taste and experience. But if you did feel anxiety or guilt about not "eating clean" then that is a real problem. I don't usually subscribe to "food is fuel" but it might be…

It's not worth worrying about (in my opinion) because whatever "damage" has been done is already done. My advice was to focus on reasonable, sustainable eating habits to get away from the "good food/ bad food" mentality that has him feeling defeated and upset because he ate a burger or seven and didn't even gain any real…

I didn't say that hormonal changes didn't occur with weight loss and especially rapid weight loss. I said they're not worth worrying about.

When you were "on" your diet did you not allow yourself to have any takeouts or treats at all? It sounds like you've just put them on a pedestal as a forbidden thing. 1000kcal for a burger and chips for a man your age is probably fine? It's only the "oh I shouldn't be having this" mentality that makes it attractive. Eat…

You got sober? You can do this. You had support and information before and now you can have them again. You don't know what to do? You're getting great advice already and the Most Helpful threads are excellent resources to start with. There's nothing to be scared of here. I understand it looks like a cliff face you have to…

I also used to be the same way. I stopped trying to make up for it and to be honest I also stopped trying to restrict myself at all until I got that behavior under control. The binging is't a screw up, it's a reaction to something. For me that's anxiety (both about life in general and about the dreaded weight gain), for…

This part worried me a little. Why should you feel any differently than you do? You feel what you feel. Are you losing weight because you actually want to or because you think that you're supposed to or because you're trying to fix some other problem? It's perfectly okay not to want to lose weight, unless you have some…