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Someone who starts wearing fur after their $1200 stimulus check
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https://youtu.be/05IScAptLRA
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inb4 "be grateful you have a job!!" :smile:
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At least you have husbands. I could use any kind of company right now.
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Wear my Easter suit to church It's canary yellow and the coat has a butterfly collar. And I don't care what the deacon's wife says - I look good in it.
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Good luck on your journey I also wish him happiness... for he seems very troubled
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Triangular-headed snakes ahead? :hushed:
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They got free pizza night tho?
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Concerts, gym, swingers clubs
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Then let people see that. Those are the ones you want to attract and it will be worth the wait if need be. When I entered my 30s, it stopped being so much about looks. Can we sit by the lake and talk about our deepest fears for 3 hours? I can't be scrolling through Instagram selfies forever. You go to the gym ok cool. What…
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AND WE PRAY, AND WE PRAY, AND WE PRAY EVERYDAY EVERYDAY EVERYDAY
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Not gonna lie. When I was using the self-checkout at Walmart this morning I kept asking the cute goth clerk for assistance. I was having trouble "reading" the code on the avocados and the scale wasn't properly weighing my bananas (I set them down on the edge wink wink). I've been feeling lonely as of late and FaceTiming…
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https://youtu.be/GTAxLII3B24
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The gyms are closed. The bars are closed. And all the guys at Costco wear pleated Dockers. You're all we got left 😳
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Why do people have to be so creepy on internet forums? What ever happened to walking past the cosmetics section at target a few dozen times and getting on with your day.
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BOOM I GOT YOUR BOYFRIEND I GOT YOUR MAN
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I drop a deuce. Then I take a long look at myself in the mirror and wonder where it all went wrong. After that literal wake-up call, I venture into the kitchen and pour myself a glass of orange juice (that's if there's any leftover from all the Screwdrivers I made the previous night. Probably not.) Then I plop down on the…
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https://youtu.be/ZKtQBu42s4k
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Gonna go to whole foods and buy wheatgrass powder. I'm leveling up. Also gonna snag a few of their muffins too lol
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It's not what you think! (de-clamps)
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What I'm gonna do tomorrow
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I'm gonna reupholster my Corolla. Whatever's left over is going into my offshore account.
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Being attractive looks like it's draining You ever see an attractive woman enter a room and all heads shift to her. And she's just there to get her teeth cleaned! Even the damn pictures on the wall tilt. And then you think about how every single day she leaves the house, eyeballs are going to be on her. She can't even like…
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(takes off my Saturday night wig) Dude... it's me!
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https://youtu.be/cCCQu5ozxuM
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https://youtu.be/A38ZhX7AR1k
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https://youtu.be/PizX6iQZsKU
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https://youtu.be/jLA68MWypMc
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I just want a cake right now With, uhh, someone jumping out of it :sleeping:
