OFF LINE Dating :)
NCTravellingGirl
Posts: 717 Member
So, I've shared that I'm done with online dating... we talk on here a lot about it though so it's left me realizing I have NO idea how to get dates OFFLINE, haha! I've had a habit of rushing through shopping, staring at the floor in public, etc... and I know I need to change that.
SO, I'd LOVE to hear about the best public place you met someone that you actually went on a date later with. Please share who approached whom and where it occurred. I'm looking for ideas :bigsmile:
SO, I'd LOVE to hear about the best public place you met someone that you actually went on a date later with. Please share who approached whom and where it occurred. I'm looking for ideas :bigsmile:
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Replies
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1. Go to the produce section of your favorite grocery store.
2. Pick out the most beautiful seedless cucumber and keep it in your hand while you 'shop' around the beer cooler
PROFIT!0 -
Well, you probably don't want to go this route, but when I was in college I got dropped while crowd-surfing at a concert. One of the guys that came over to see if I was all right was not only another student, but a trained first responder. After spending an hour or longer with me at the med station, he gave me his number and asked me to call him the next day to let him know how I was doing. So I did, and then asked him to lunch so I could officially thank him. He accepted, and we went out a few days later.0
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1. Go to the produce section of your favorite grocery store.
2. Pick out the most beautiful seedless cucumber and keep it in your hand while you 'shop' around the beer cooler
PROFIT!
Make sure the cucumber isn't too big. Wouldn't want to affect any egos. hehehehe :laugh:
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1. Go to the produce section of your favorite grocery store.
2. Pick out the most beautiful seedless cucumber and keep it in your hand while you 'shop' around the beer cooler
PROFIT!
Make sure the cucumber isn't too big. Wouldn't want to affect any egos. hehehehe :laugh:
yeah... might wanna open a jar of gherkins instead! :laugh:0 -
Just go to the places you enjoy being. Whatever it is (live music, Karaoke, sporting events, hiking, a cooking class, etc.), you're more likely to find someone you're compatible with there. The primary advantage online dating gives you is the opportunity to focus on people of similar interests. The next best way is to be doing what you love when you meet him. Plus, if you're enjoying yourself doing an activity, you're more likely to be smiling and less stressed about the whole thing.
For the record, I've never approached anyone I saw in a grocery store, but I have asked a cashier out before (she said no).0 -
Where is DM when you need him? Isn't this his favorite topic? :laugh: 0
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1. Go to the produce section of your favorite grocery store.
2. Pick out the most beautiful seedless cucumber and keep it in your hand while you 'shop' around the beer cooler
PROFIT!
Make sure the cucumber isn't too big. Wouldn't want to affect any egos. hehehehe :laugh:
yeah... might wanna open a jar of gherkins instead! :laugh:
Oh oh oh oh and then you can ask a man to open them for you so he can show off his big manly muscles. LOL0 -
Where is DM when you need him? Isn't this his favorite topic? :laugh:
I was thinking the same thing, haha... He'd LOVE this :laugh:0 -
I agree. Go to places you usually go but this time, no staring at the floor. Make lots of eye contact, smile a ton, and maybe even lick your lips in a seductive non porn'ish way. I also will bite my lower lip at times (didn't even realize this until a couple of guys told me and they thought it was sexy).
I go to a lot of bars, happy hours, concerts, shows. So this is where I will meet guys. I will go to the clear to get a drink and I'll smile and say hi to the guy sitting there alone. Sometimes he will talk, sometimes he won't.
I went to an 80s cover band show alone. I was dancing and smiling all by my lonesome. A guy approached me, asked me to dance and though it didn't work out, we are still friends. He still mentions me being the only girl that was smiling.
Carry yourself as a single hot to trot gal!!0 -
So, I've shared that I'm done with online dating... we talk on here a lot about it though so it's left me realizing I have NO idea how to get dates OFFLINE, haha! I've had a habit of rushing through shopping, staring at the floor in public, etc... and I know I need to change that.
SO, I'd LOVE to hear about the best public place you met someone that you actually went on a date later with. Please share who approached whom and where it occurred. I'm looking for ideas :bigsmile:
If you can come up for my bday, we will definitely go out and work on our confidence.
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For me, any kind of crowd setting, I usually can make a comment to myself and get someone's attention.0
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Once when I was about 22, I got a date with a guy I met at a fair because another girl in the group ran off and told him against my will that I was checking him out. I was embarrassed, and when I saw him walking back over with her to meet me, I was dizzy with anxiety. But we started talking, had a beer or two, and exchanged numbers. We went out on a date about a week or so later. I know it was somewhat juvenile the way it all came about, but oh well.0
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Just go to the places you enjoy being. Whatever it is (live music, Karaoke, sporting events, hiking, a cooking class, etc.), you're more likely to find someone you're compatible with there. The primary advantage online dating gives you is the opportunity to focus on people of similar interests. The next best way is to be doing what you love when you meet him. Plus, if you're enjoying yourself doing an activity, you're more likely to be smiling and less stressed about the whole thing.
For the record, I've never approached anyone I saw in a grocery store, but I have asked a cashier out before (she said no).
I've tried this.. for the last year..or so..and nada not one date not one interested male. I'm in 2 running clubs, I go kayaking with different groups of random people every other friday, I've gone to karaoke, I go hiking, ect. I keep meeting married men and lots of women. Its very frustrating in terms of hoping to meet a good guy. But atleast I like what I'm doing lol0 -
Last year, on my lunch hour I was on my way to Panera to grab a salad. I left my office on foot and had just crossed a street. A guy met me on the other side, asked my name and age (I work on a college campus but can pass for a teenager). We exchanged contact information and had a ate a bit later. We went bowling and listened to some live jazz. In the end, it didn't work out. He thought spending approx. $200 on our first date automatically "earned" him dessert. Ummm no!SO, I'd LOVE to hear about the best public place you met someone that you actually went on a date later with. Please share who approached whom and where it occurred. I'm looking for ideas :bigsmile:
Funny part: I ran into him about a few month ago in a McDonalds when I was out with my brother. It was AWKWARD to explain to my brother who the guy was.0 -
Offline dating?! what the heck is that
In all seriousness, almost every girl I've had a decent relationship with was always a setup by a friend. Offline is definitely best.0 -
Hmm.. I've gotten some dates by challenging (and winning of course) men to chugging a beer/shot, and I went to a club once where there was a cover band. I ended up talking to the drummer and we dated for a couple months. It didn't work out because he lived too far away and was always down in the dumps without taking any actions about it though, lol.
I met another guy at a bank standing in line to talk to the teller, went out with him once.
Just go anywhere, and talk to people! 0 -
If you have a dog go to dog park. Some girls I know said its great place to meet people.0
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I used to go to strip clubs and it was effective. Nowadays a kilo of coke and a babysitter are just too expensive though.0
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Where is DM when you need him? Isn't this his favorite topic? :laugh:
I was thinking the same thing, haha... He'd LOVE this :laugh:
He'll have lots of statistics to provide on the benefits of online vs offline dating and the proximity to your location and all that fun stuff. :laugh:
Just messin' with you, DM!
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Random thoughts:
1 - Church. You're religious, right? Surely there are some eligible guys at your church? Or try to get active with some church events. A friend of mine is religious, and she's always going somewhere on weekends to help build houses for the poor, etc. Even if you don't meet anyone, you're helping people in need. And getting some exercise in the process.
2 - Join a league. Volleyball, badminton, tennis, bowling. Whatever. Again, great exercise, even if you don't meet anyone. Sometimes they even have golf vacations for singles, etc.
3 - A friend of a friend. I'm sure you know some "connectors." These are the people - usually women - who are great at setting up others. They oftentimes suck at meeting people for themselves. But they set up everyone else. Find one of these women and let them know what you're looking for.
4 - Volunteer in the community. Another friend of mine got involved in politics. She began to organize events, etc. It started small. Now she is a major player in her community. It was really amazing to see the transformation in her, as well. She went from organizing bake sales for candidates to giving speeches in front of large crowds. If politics aren't your thing, what about local theater? Soup kitchen? Local symphony? The beauty of this is that you're going to meet interesting people. You know, the kind that listen to classical music, try to help the poor, have energy to change things... And again, even if you don't find Mr. Right, you're making a difference.
5 - Charity work. Oftentimes you will be lobbying companies to donate. You're not speaking with low level employees, but relatively senior level people. Great targets...
--P0 -
If you have a dog go to dog park. Some girls I know said its great place to meet people.
This is not true. I only ever see women and couples at the ones near me.0 -
You have home improvement projects you need to do, right?
Home Depot, Lowes and similar stores are good places. But gotta keep that head up and smile! Bonus points if you ask someone's advice on "how to".
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2 - Join a league. Volleyball, badminton, tennis, bowling. Whatever. Again, great exercise, even if you don't meet anyone. Sometimes they even have golf vacations for singles, etc.
3 - A friend of a friend. I'm sure you know some "connectors." These are the people - usually women - who are great at setting up others. They oftentimes suck at meeting people for themselves. But they set up everyone else. Find one of these women and let them know what you're looking for.
4 - Volunteer in the community. Another friend of mine got involved in politics. She began to organize events, etc. It started small. Now she is a major player in her community. It was really amazing to see the transformation in her, as well. She went from organizing bake sales for candidates to giving speeches in front of large crowds. If politics aren't your thing, what about local theater? Soup kitchen? Local symphony? The beauty of this is that you're going to meet interesting people. You know, the kind that listen to classical music, try to help the poor, have energy to change things... And again, even if you don't find Mr. Right, you're making a difference.
5 - Charity work. Oftentimes you will be lobbying companies to donate. You're not speaking with low level employees, but relatively senior level people. Great targets...
--P
All of these are great suggestions, especially #3. Work your personal web of relationships for potential dates.
Meetup groups are teeming with singles. Go to them. Don’t go to a meetup group that is specifically labeled “singles”, as those groups tend to have more forced environments. Pick some Meetup groups based on some sort of common interests, and it can be pretty generic. Most Meetup group events are filled with singles because the majority of events that the majority of groups do are bar mix and mingles, and someone already in a relationship would perceive no value in your typical bar mix and mingle.0 -
2 - Join a league. Volleyball, badminton, tennis, bowling. Whatever. Again, great exercise, even if you don't meet anyone. Sometimes they even have golf vacations for singles, etc.
3 - A friend of a friend. I'm sure you know some "connectors." These are the people - usually women - who are great at setting up others. They oftentimes suck at meeting people for themselves. But they set up everyone else. Find one of these women and let them know what you're looking for.
4 - Volunteer in the community. Another friend of mine got involved in politics. She began to organize events, etc. It started small. Now she is a major player in her community. It was really amazing to see the transformation in her, as well. She went from organizing bake sales for candidates to giving speeches in front of large crowds. If politics aren't your thing, what about local theater? Soup kitchen? Local symphony? The beauty of this is that you're going to meet interesting people. You know, the kind that listen to classical music, try to help the poor, have energy to change things... And again, even if you don't find Mr. Right, you're making a difference.
5 - Charity work. Oftentimes you will be lobbying companies to donate. You're not speaking with low level employees, but relatively senior level people. Great targets...
--P
All of these are great suggestions, especially #3. Work your personal web of relationships for potential dates.
Meetup groups are teeming with singles. Go to them. Don’t go to a meetup group that is specifically labeled “singles”, as those groups tend to have more forced environments. Pick some Meetup groups based on some sort of common interests, and it can be pretty generic. Most Meetup group events are filled with singles because the majority of events that the majority of groups do are bar mix and mingles, and someone already in a relationship would perceive no value in your typical bar mix and mingle.
I am going to drag her to a social for one of my meetup groups on friday.0 -
I am going to drag her to a social for one of my meetup groups on friday.
YAY! I'm so excited to meet Minnesota/ Ruth and hang out this Friday with her Meetup group! It's been interesting and slightly hilarious reading these posts LOVE IT!
So here are my thoughts -
1- The Religious angle sounds great in theory, and I DO believe that it what would be best, to share compatible beliefs. HOWEVER, I know this may start an interesting side discussion, but I've never met a single guy at church that I respected AND was attracted to at the same time. Most Christian men seem to misunderstand what it means to be the leader of their family. They are either overly dominant and expect a "submissive" wife (let's not start a discussion on what the term should really mean), OR they are a doormat who lets everyone walk all over them. So as much as I would love it, I've never dated anyone who shared my faith.
2- Friends of Friends again sounds great. But I moved to this area knowing no one... all my friends are SINGLE women I met at church, haha.... if they knew anyone worth dating, they'd be all over them first! Clearly I need to expand my circle, but quite honestly, it's hard to BUILD a new relationship with a married couple because they have their own life going on (usually kids). Friendships are hard enough to maintain when lifestyles are different but are even harder to START.
3- The meetup groups I definitely agree with. Several of my formerly single friends played flag football or did sports based meetup groups (not for singles) and are no longer single.
4- Volunteering is something I've very passionate about. I guess I do a lot of it through my church though so it's not a separate group of people. Something new for me to consider outside of my normal volunteer activities.
5- Shopping/ Home improvement stores - I work at Lowe's HQ so too many of my coworkers are in the stores, haha! I used to own but now rent so I generally pay someone to do improvements and deduct it off my rent. Maybe I should be picking up the repair guys, haha?! I'm also a purposeful grocery shopper. I go in with grocery lists and get it done and get out. I don't look around so perhaps I could start paying attention to my surroundings..... or just start walking around with cucumbers???? Bahaha!0 -
I am going to drag her to a social for one of my meetup groups on friday.
YAY! I'm so excited to meet Minnesota/ Ruth and hang out this Friday with her Meetup group! It's been interesting and slightly hilarious reading these posts LOVE IT!
So here are my thoughts -
1- The Religious angle sounds great in theory, and I DO believe that it what would be best, to share compatible beliefs. HOWEVER, I know this may start an interesting side discussion, but I've never met a single guy at church that I respected AND was attracted to at the same time. Most Christian men seem to misunderstand what it means to be the leader of their family. They are either overly dominant and expect a "submissive" wife (let's not start a discussion on what the term should really mean), OR they are a doormat who lets everyone walk all over them. So as much as I would love it, I've never dated anyone who shared my faith.
2- Friends of Friends again sounds great. But I moved to this area knowing no one... all my friends are SINGLE women I met at church, haha.... if they knew anyone worth dating, they'd be all over them first! Clearly I need to expand my circle, but quite honestly, it's hard to BUILD a new relationship with a married couple because they have their own life going on (usually kids). Friendships are hard enough to maintain when lifestyles are different but are even harder to START.
3- The meetup groups I definitely agree with. Several of my formerly single friends played flag football or did sports based meetup groups (not for singles) and are no longer single.
4- Volunteering is something I've very passionate about. I guess I do a lot of it through my church though so it's not a separate group of people. Something new for me to consider outside of my normal volunteer activities.
5- Shopping/ Home improvement stores - I work at Lowe's HQ so too many of my coworkers are in the stores, haha! I used to own but now rent so I generally pay someone to do improvements and deduct it off my rent. Maybe I should be picking up the repair guys, haha?! I'm also a purposeful grocery shopper. I go in with grocery lists and get it done and get out. I don't look around so perhaps I could start paying attention to my surroundings..... or just start walking around with cucumbers???? Bahaha!
I'm gonna try to put a slightly different outlook on points 1 & 2.
1. Keep your eyes and ears open. You're stereotyping. They are out there.
2. If you go out with your friends & one is interested in a guy but the guy is interested in you, that's fine, as long as they haven't previously dated or had a relationship. She has no claim to him & he's not interested in her so it's no big deal. I know you referred to them introducing you but this is just another thought if you're out together.
I would say don't try so hard to look for it. Be natural, be yourself, and be aware that the opportunnity could present itself anywhere at any time, and most definitely when you least expect it. Cliche but very true.0 -
It seems sometimes that everything I do I am surrounded by about 90% guys. So you're already in engineering right? You've talked about at guys at work before, but do you have any friends there around your age that might have any single friends? If not, make some. It's relatively easy chatting with people at work because you see them every day. Ask them to go to happy hour sometime.
Sports bars. These are always about 95% guys, just avoid the regulars. Football season is starting soon, I always assumed any sports bar on a football Saturday or Sunday would be a gold mine for women. Maybe you could meet another O$U fan.
You may have to get out of your comfort zone for a while, but just start doing more. Do them by yourself if you have to. Try wine tastings, take a class (cooking or something at a local community college you may be interested in), volunteer outside of your church, go hang out at a coffee shop and just read, or maybe try a new sport. Sometimes when I golf with a friends they pair us with one or two other people so things move more quickly. I always hope it will be two hot chicks but it never is. I was also on a social floor hockey league for a while.0 -
It seems sometimes that everything I do I am surrounded by about 90% guys. So you're already in engineering right? You've talked about at guys at work before, but do you have any friends there around your age that might have any single friends? If not, make some. It's relatively easy chatting with people at work because you see them every day. Ask them to go to happy hour sometime.
Sports bars. These are always about 95% guys, just avoid the regulars. Football season is starting soon, I always assumed any sports bar on a football Saturday or Sunday would be a gold mine for women. Maybe you could meet another O$U fan.
You may have to get out of your comfort zone for a while, but just start doing more. Do them by yourself if you have to. Try wine tastings, take a class (cooking or something at a local community college you may be interested in), volunteer outside of your church, go hang out at a coffee shop and just read, or maybe try a new sport. Sometimes when I golf with a friends they pair us with one or two other people so things move more quickly. I always hope it will be two hot chicks but it never is. I was also on a social floor hockey league for a while.
I'm working on the work connection thing. I was in Home Decor surrounded by all women because what man want to buy rugs and curtains for a living. Now I'm moving to HARDWARE, and I'm already surrounded by men. I start the new team next week :happy:
I do hang at sports bars during football season. I'll admit this is the first season in a while I've felt confident enough to pay attention to who's around me though. Thanks for the O$U comment, smart mouth...:grumble:
I've done a lot of wine tastings,etc... but again hadn't considered it a dating possibility. Guess I need to open my eyes a bit, haha...Hopefully when Minnesota and I meet up Friday, I can meet some of her meetup folks and get up the nerve to try one of the sports related meetups. I'd love to play softball, go biking, etc...
Thanks for still stopping by to give advice now that you've landed yours, haha :flowerforyou:0
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